Kryptonite
by elizabethbruttenholm
Summary: I didn't think David would ever come back. I thought Tig and I would be together, come hell or highwater.  I thought Opie, my best friend, & Donna, my sister, would live happily ever after. I thought Jax would be there to protect me. I thought wrong.
1. Chapter 1

I couldn't breathe. I couldn't move. The floor of the garage was hard and cold against my back, even through my shirt, it was cold. His weight was on top of me, crushing me.

"Opie," I cried, "Jax… get your ghetto booties off me! I can't breathe…"

"Take it like a man," Jax said, jumping on top of Opie again, he reached down and began to tickle me.

Tig and Chibs laughed at me and my two best friends, rolling around the garage floor. They started betting on who would win. Clay told me where to hit them but, they held my hands down. And, Piney, well, Piney just laughed and laughed.

At this point, I couldn't breathe, I couldn't move, and I ran the possibility of wetting my pants if I kept laughing. "Guys," I said, "Guys… I'm gonna pee my pants!"

That seemed to get the correct reaction.

I had known Opie and Jax since kindergarten. We had been put together in a group for some kind of activity and we hadn't separated since.

"Stop screwing around," Gemma said, peaking over the top of her camera, "Lemme take one half-decent picture."

_Gemma didn't usually get emotional but, seeing the three of them together with their big, goofy grins made her a bit weepy. She looked at Jax and Opie who had grown into men. Opie was still growing. And, Gracie, with her big smile, big eyes, and poofy, curly hair that puffed out beneath her cap, in a shower of frizz. She was acting more like Gemma everyday. Her sass and her wit. Her need to take care of Jax and Opie was beginning to show, just like Gemma. Gemma had begun to think of her as her student. Learning the ways of the club, Lord knows that Tara or Donna couldn't do it… take over when Gemma couldn't do it anymore._

Gemma pulled the camera to her eye again, while Mary's face popped up over hers, "Harry," she began but, seeing no response, she tried a different address, "Opie, please take off that ugly hat and put you graduation cap back on."

_Mary felt a bit awkward being at Opie's graduation. Two years ago she had run off with Opie, she didn't want the Sons of Anarchy to be his life, like it was Piney's. However, Opie, as expected, came back. Shortly followed by Mary._

Opie responded to his nickname. My mom tried to find something to screech at, too but, she just took the pictures. A barrage of flashes caused us to see spots and rub our eyes. Opie quickly replaced his cap with his black beanie, that I had bought for him a few years back. He walked over to my younger sister, who was now a junior, and gave her a hug. Opie and Donna had been going steady since she was a freshman. Jax walked over to Tara Knowles, his girlfriend, who was also wearing the graduation attire and hugged her as well. Only one thing I could do, look for David. David Hale and I had been together since sixth grade. "True Love". That's what Jax would say, followed by, "Hale and Gracie, sittin' in a tree…" To which I would respond with a slap to the back of his blonde head. I spotted David in the middle of all his football buddies. I stood on my tippy toes and waived to him. He waved back and pushed himself through the crowd. "Hey Gracie," he said, scooping me into one of his gentle hugs and kissing me on the cheek, "Guess we're adults, now."

"Guess so," I said, not really wanting to be adults, "We're having a little barbecue at the garage tomorrow, I was hoping you could come."

David looked at me, "I don't know Gracie," he said, I knew the answer he was going to give me before I had even asked him, "I don't think that's a good idea… you know the guys don't like me."

"I understand, David," I said, disappointed but, not surprised, "Well, if you need me, that's where I'll be."

I wrapped my arm around Tig's. "You look beautiful," he said, kissing me on the lips, he moved his mouth to my ear, "Can't wait to get you home and outta that dress."

"I'm gonna take that as this dress is ugly or we're gonna have a good night," I whispered.

"Good night… great night." Tig said, kissing me one more time.

He looked good in a tuxedo. I never thought I would see the day. We let Gemma and Clay walk a ways down the aisle, and then we started. Jax and Wendy were behind us. I had never seen Wendy so cleaned up before. By the time we were all in our places, Opie standing at the front of the church, the wedding march began. Donna began her walk down the aisle, she looked so beautiful. I couldn't believe her and Opie were getting married, even then.

"Wanna dance," Tig said, more of an order than a request.

I jumped, he had come up behind me and pinched my bottom. "Sure, baby."

_Damn, she looked beautiful, Tig thought. The red silky dress flowed down the floor, showing off her curves. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. Her curls were thrown up on her head but, had fallen from a bit of dancing. A trace of red lip stick still clung to her lips. Damn. _

Tig took my hand in his, wrapped his arm around my waist, I rested my hand on his shoulder. Quite romantic. Must have been the "mood" because, I had never expected Tigger to ask me to dance, a slow dance at that. I stared at him, looking at his eyes, his hair, his face, his hands that held mine. I couldn't imagine a day without him. Another man jumped into my head, I quickly erased it, him. "You know," he said, breaking me from my trance, "If you take a picture, it'd last longer… just saying."

I laughed, "I love you, Alex Trager,"

"Shit," he said, laughing and pulling me closer to him (which I thought may have been impossible.)

I sighed, "That's not the response I was looking for but, I believe it will do."

Tig and I finished out the night with a few more dances. To my surprise, Tig was actually quite the dancer. ( He even knew the Cha Cha Slide) He had taken off his jacket and rolled up the white sleeves on his dress shirt. With those suspenders, tailored pants, and shiny shoes, I didn't know if I could wait to get him home. One of my Uncles stood up to make a toast. I wasn't listening intently, I picked up on "high school sweethearts" and I felt a pang of jealousy. I immediately thought of David. I felt guilty for being there with Tig, for being with Tig in general. I wondered what David was doing, how he was, if he missed me. I quickly realized that this was not the time to be feeling down. I snapped out of it and convinced Chibs to dance with me, receiving very dirty looks from the two blondes that were clinging to him.

I erased those last thoughts of David and started the Electric Slide with Chibs.


	2. Chapter 2

Tig kissed me, his usual roughness pushing down on my lips. I ran my hands through his head of curls.

_Tig loved being with her, with Gracie. He loved her scent, her voice, her body. He loved that her hair was as curly as his, if not more. He imagined what their offspring (if it came to that and hopefully it wouldn't) would look like. Little psychopaths with afros. _

He pushed me with his hips until the backs of my knees hit the bed and I fell backwards, Tig undid his belt and dropped his pants. "Oh my," I giggled, "Commando."

"That reminds me," he said, crawling on top of me, "I need you to do some laundry."

I walked back out to the garage, straightening my shirt. "Little, afternoon delight," Jax said, never looking up from the bike he was working on.

_Jax knew that Gracie loved Tig. He hated it though, knew that one of these days Tig would find a new girl, new pussy. It was inevitable, it was Tig._

"None of your business pervert!" I said, walking into the garage office.

When I opened the door, I surprised to see Gemma and Chief Unser talking. "Hey Gracie," Unser said, "Nice to see ya."

"You too, Chief," I replied.

"Well, Gemma," Unser said, while he stood up and walked toward the door, "I'll see ya around… take care Gracie."

Unser closed the door behind him as he left. "Gotta tell ya something, Gracie-girl," Gemma said, lifting the blinds and looking out into the garage at the guys.

_Gemma loved Gracie. She was practically her own. She had watched Gracie grow up. She, like Jax, knew that Gracie loved Tig. And like Jax, Gemma knew that it would only end in Gracie's heart being broken. Clay, who felt the same father-daughter feelings for Gracie, had agreed with Gemma that they needed to talk to her, about what she was planning with her future with Tig. _

Tig had made his way back to work. I stood next to Gemma, staring at Tig, the corners of my mouth turning up. I was always in a good mood after a romp with Tig.

"What's up," I said, remembering she had some news for me,

"Well, David's back… Unser told me… he's been looking around town for you," Gemma said, looking at him while still facing the garage.

_Although Gracie had tried to hide her emotions about David but, Gemma saw them, clear as day. As soon as Gemma had said "David", Gracie sucked in her breath and her eyes sparkled, a reaction that Gemma had yet to witness the mention of Tig give Gracie. _

I silently sat down in one of the old office chairs. I hadn't spoken to David in almost five years. Before he left for college, he had proposed to me. I had said yes, thinking that I would have gone with him. I didn't and a long term relationship wasn't' going to work out. I wanted to go with David so badly but, my family's business was my future, not college. So, as David went off to get an education, I stayed behind. I was jealous that he would be able to get out of Charming. And, I was devastated that I couldn't go with him. That's when I had found respite in Tig, of all people. "Well," I said, not really sure how to react to this news, after I had told him it was over, he had promised never to come back to Charming, "He's not going to like where he finds me."

When David and I separated, all hell broke loose around me. Not only was I an emotional wreck but, so was Jax. Tara had left for Chicago, which put Jax into a depression that seemed nothing could cure. A few years later, Opie was arrested and put away. My parents had moved to Florida shortly before it, leaving me to take care of Donna, Ellie, and Kenny who were just babies then. (Not to mention, Jax) And then, David, who I loved, left. I still loved him and I knew that he being back would create problems. BIG problems.

I began to stand up when Gemma and I heard Chibs hollering for Gemma to come quick. We both ran out to find Jax sitting on one the stools in the garage. He was sitting there with his hands in his hair with a look of total confusion on his face. Gemma knelt down in front of him, looking him over for some kind of injury. "What's wrong," Gemma said, standing up and looking at the guys, "What's going on?"

Jax looked up at Gemma and I.

_He realized that he was looking at the two most important girls in his life, His mother and his best friend. Soon, Wendy would have to be important again too, although she couldn't be treated as a mere distraction this time around. _

I watched as Jax opened and closed his mouth to say something but nothing was coming out. "Just tell them Jax," a voice said, behind Gemma and I. We both turned around at the same time. It was Wendy. Standing there, looking high and mighty as usual. She wore an old stained shirt with a pair of ratty jeans. She looked like she hadn't showered lately. I wasn't about to get close enough to her to take a whiff.

_Wendy looked at Gracie and envied her. Hated her. Wendy hated Gracie because of the love that Jax had for Gracie. Because, Jax would do anything for Gracie. Now, Wendy thought, now he'll love me. He'll have to love me. Or else._

"Tell us what," I asked, turning back to Jax, I put a hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze, "You can say it Jax, its okay."

Jax, again, opened his mouth but, no words came out.

_What's going to happen now? I can't take care of… of… I'm going to be a… a… she's…. she… is…_

"Oh, for shits sake," Wendy said, rolling her eyes, "I'm pregnant."

My jaw hit the floor and bounced to the ceiling and probably hit the floor again. A smile spread across my face and I turned to look at Clay and Gemma. "You're gonna be grandparents!" I said, giggling.

I sat in the living room, looking at a list of dishes I would make for Opie's coming home party. It was definitely going to be big and one dish of potato salad among who knows how many bikers wasn't going to be enough. Better get a few bags of potatoes, I thought. I was thinking about Tig. And David. I wasn't sure if I should go see David at the station. I knew that I should, that I would. I was really debating if I should tell Tig I was going. I knew the answer but, I didn't want Tig's reaction. I would cross that bridge when I came to it. A knock at the door snapped me out of my thoughts.

I walked past the mirror I had on my wall. That was a sight I didn't need to see. "Shit" I said to myself. I fluffed up my hair and dug some lip gloss out of my purse and smacked some on.

I looked… decent. At least I hadn't put on the sweats. I opened the door, "Hey, you usually don't knock, ya-,"

"Hello, Gracie,"

For the second time that day, my jaw hit the floor.

_She hadn't changed, he thought. Still beautiful. He had missed her and wished he wouldn't have left… her. He would have left Charming but, he would have taken her with him. Married her, started a family. She was still staring at him, her big brown eyes as wide as could be._

"Usually," he laughed, "People say hello back or give someone the finger… some kind of response."

All I could do was stare at him. He was… a man. A man in uniform. My knees were weak, like they used to get when I was around him. He had those eyes. Those eyes that weren't like Tigs… they were different and I could get lost in them. I realized that he was talking to me but, I couldn't comprehend. I was still taking him in. His arms… his arms were bigger. I wanted to touch them, wanted them to hold me. I took a deep breath. He still had that same stupid haircut and that big smile.

"David." I finally managed to spit out. This must have been what Jax felt like when Wendy told him the news, speechless.

Looks like that bridge was here.


	3. Chapter 3

"David," I said again, not realizing that I had repeated his name a few times now. He hugged me. I stared at him and "Come on in."

"Thanks," he laughed, I knew he would. He always laughed at my general goofiness.

_Gracie looked older but, still the same. Just like Donna but, Gracie had a shock of curly hair that was always messy. And, she was feistier than Donna, too. David scooped her up in a big hug, she didn't hug him back but, stood there with her eyes as big as saucers. She finally asked him to come inside._

"You wanna coke?" I asked David.

"Sure," he said.

_As Gracie disappeared into the kitchen, David walked over to the fireplace mantle and inspected the array of pictures that filled it. The frames contained photos of members of the Sons of Anarchy. Most of them with Gracie hanging on to the side of Alex 'Tig' Trager. David's stomach tightened in a knot, was she with him? He looked around the place and what he saw confirmed it: a work shirt from the Teller-Morrow Garage with the name tag labeled 'Tig' embroidered on it, a couple empty beer bottles (which David knew Gracie didn't drink) sat on the dining room table, and pair of men's work boots sat by the door. _

A wave of panic hit me, I grabbed my cell phone and sent Gemma a text. Probably not the best way to welcome a man you had been without for five years but, it could develop into a matter of life and death. Literally.

_Gemma picked up her cell that was buzzing around the table. "David is at my place… keep Tig around. Please." Gemma quickly shut her phone as Tig walked in the office. "Well," he said, setting some paperwork down on the desk, "I'm gonna head over to Gracie's, anything you need me to do before I lock up?"_

_Shit, Gemma thought, shit. Shit. Shit. "Um… will you go to the store with me and get stuff for Opie's party? I might… I will need some help. Please?"_

"_Uh…" Tig was surprised that Gemma wanted help with groceries, "Sure. I'll follow you to the store."_

_On the way to the store, Gemma sent Gracie a text, "Tig is with me. Don't know how long I can hold him. Hurry up."_

I read the text. I didn't want to hurry up. Being wit h David made me forget about all the rest of the shit going on around me. I felt bad for not being able to talk to him. I stood up and stretched, trying to figure out how to get David to leave without mentioning Tig. I glanced toward the door and David took the hint. "I'd better be leaving," he said, standing up and making for the door, "Maybe we can go out tomorrow? Like we used to? To breakfast?"

I walked over and leaned against the wall next to the door, David's hand rested on the doorknob waiting for my response. "Yeah," I said, "But, Opie comes home tomorrow, it'll have to be fast."

David leaned in and kissed me. But, I turned my head to the side so his lips landed on my cheek. He breathed a sigh, "See you tomorrow," he said, opening the door, and stepping out. He closed the door gently behind him.

I turned around and picked up the two cans of Coke that sat on the table, neither of them opened.

Tig rolled from on top of me to his side of the bed. We were both still breathing hard but, he was already half asleep. I rolled onto my side and looked at the clock. 2:00 AM. I was a little nervous about going to see David tomorrow, mostly excited. I wanted to kiss him… I wanted to do more than kiss him. But, reality hit me in the face. Going to bed with one side of the law and having breakfast with another was not going to work.

_Tig finally caught his breath, I could do this every night, he thought to himself. I do do this every night. He turned over and looked at Gracie who was sleeping on her side; he ran a finger down her spine, he saw her shiver. Tig scooted closer to her and wrapped his arm around her, Gracie settled into him. 'Good night,' Tig whispered in her ear. _

'_Night,' Gracie replied._

Tig was gone when I woke up. I stretched and looked at my phone, today was going to be a great day or a horribly, tragic one. David had sent me a text, "Café. 9:00."

_David sat at one of the tables in the corner at the café. He was drinking coffee and waiting for Gracie. His fingers tapped impatiently on the tabletop. He had been talking to Unser earlier this morning and Unser had told David about Gracie and Tig. _

"Hey David," I said.

He looked up at me and smiled. I missed that smile. I sat down and ordered some coffee and breakfast. We talked a bit, ate a bit, and talked some more. Finally, it grew silent, and David sighed, "Unser told me about you and Alex Trager," he said with a grimace, like saying Tig's name hurt his insides.

"Yeah," I said, I wasn't really sure how to explain that one, "We kind of hooked up… well, more than hooked up… we've been together, basically since you left."

David looked a little confused. "Why… him?" he asked. He sounded a little disgusted, like I had stooped to the bottom of the barrel and scraped Tig off of it, "Alex Trager is a bad man. There's no other way to say it… he's done horrible things, everyone knows that… you shouldn't be with him… that's what I don't get… why him?"

"Why not him," I retorted, a bit pissed, this wasn't the first time someone had brought this up with me, "He was there. He was there when you couldn't and wouldn't be. He was there when you left and took everything with you." I stood up and grabbed my purse, I could feel myself losing control, I think I already had, "Really David? Did you expect me to sit around and wait for you?"

He started to say something but I cut him off, "Shut up, David. That was rhetorical."

I turned on my heel and walked away, stomping my feet as loudly as I could. I muttered all kinds of profanities in David's direction. That shit head wanted me to sit around knitting while he romped around with girls in his dorm rooms. Bastard.

_David watched Gracie storm off. Well, he knew he didn't say that right but, he really couldn't see anything that he and Tig had in common. Or why Gracie would turn to him. To David, Alex Trager was one of the slimiest men in Charming. David knew about Trager and his… habits. David had always known that Gracie might end up with one of them, he never thought it would be Tig._

I drove out to Donna's to pick up Kenny and Ellie before she left to get Opie. I walked in and was greeted by my niece and nephew squealing about the party and their father coming home. "Where's your mom?" I asked them, kissing each of them on the cheek.

"She's in her room," Ellie said, rolling her eyes, "C'mon… she needs help."

Ellie took my hand in hers and dragged me to Donna's room. "Oh, hey, Gracie," Donna said, holding up two shirts in front of a mirror, "I can't decide what to wear to get Opie," she said, looking thoroughly confused.

I walked up to Donna and picked out the blue one. She always looked good in blue. "I don't think Opie is gonna care what you're wearing. I think he's gonna wanna rip it off… ya know?"

"Shut up," Donna said, blushing, "I don't need you to be thinking about that." She paused and changed her shirt, "I heard that David was back in town."

"Yeah, he is," I said curtly, I didn't want to talk about him but, I would have to. I just let it all go at once, "He came over last night, before Tig. We talked for a bit. He tried to kiss me."

Donna laughed, "Well, that's great!"

"Its not great. I'm with Tig. I love Tig." I said, on the verge of tears.

"But, you still love David," Donna said, finishing my thoughts.

"Yes…no… I don't know," I said, flopping down on the bed, "We were in high school, we were just kids."

_Donna couldn't help but feel a bit of sadness for Gracie. She loved her sister more than anything. But, Gracie had to make that choice herself. No one could make it for her. And it wasn't going to be easy. But, Donna didn't think about that long… tonight, Opie was coming home._

Donna sighed, "Let's not worry about that now. Tonight is going to be fun."

I smiled. I couldn't help but smile. My Opie, my best friend, my brother-in-law, was coming home. I missed him so much. Everyone did.

"C'mon kids," I said, walking out of Donna's room as she finished getting ready, "Let's get outta here so your mom can get your dad."

Kenny and Ellie went into a fit of screaming and jumping around before I even got them out to the car. We drove over to Gemma's to pick up some food. Piney, was just pulling out of the driveway as we were pulling in. He waved at the kids and I before heading out to ride with Donna. The kids waived at their grandfather and jumped out of the car before I even turned I it off.

"Hey kids," Gemma said, wiping off her hands and giving them hugs and kisses, "Are you ready for the big party?"

The kids responded with yet another round of jumping up and down and squealing. "What did you give them?" Gemma laughed.

I raised my hands in the air, "Wasn't me."

"Why don't you kids go play downstairs," Gemma said, the kids ran off, squealing some more. Gemma turned to me, "Well?"

"Well, what?" I said, becoming completely engrossed in the vegetable tray in front of me.

"How did it go over with David," she asked, taking a bite out of a celery stick.

I told her. When I finished, she was laughing. "What the hell, Gemma?" I said, her giggles not helping my mood, "He really pissed me off. I mean, I love Tig… who is he to tell me any different? Ugh. He really pissed me off."

Gemma stared at me before she handed me a bowl of potato salad, "He's a man Gracie, he's gonna piss you off."

After that, the kids, Gemma and I loaded up our two cars with food and drinks for the party and headed over to the clubhouse. We pulled in and parked the cars next to the regular line of motorcycles. Half-Sack came out a few moments later and I loaded him up with cases of pop. "Guys are in church," he said, "Should be out soon."

"Thanks, Sack," I said, and followed him inside.

I put the pops in the fridge as Gemma, Ellie, and Kenny came in with bowls of different sides. When we finished bringing in all the food, the guys finally came out. "Just in time," I said, shoving Jax.

"Its what we do," he said, kissing my forehead, "You gals get everything?"

"And then some," I said, I gave each of the guys a kiss and hug, Tig's being a little more intimate, before going to find Kenny and Ellie. They were in Tig's dorm room watching T.V. with Half-Sack. The three seemed content so I let them be. Bobby was pulling out the grill when I got back. I scooted back inside where the rest of the guys were. Tig, Clay and Jax were sitting at the bar talking while Gemma smashed some hamburgers into patties. I walked up and put my arm around Tig, "How's it going, boys?"

"Ready to get this party going," Clay said, taking a swig of beer. Like magic, the rumble of a group of motorcycles could be heard from outside. We all got up and walked out, the scent of the barbecue filled my nose and I felt Tig's arm slip around my waist and he kissed my head.

_Tig kissed Gracie's hair and smelled her shampoo. She bought this strawberry scented shampoo from this weird hair joint downtown. He loved it but, he wasn't about to go around telling the guys about Gracie's shampooing habits. _

I didn't recognize the men that pulled into the lot but, they seemed to know Clay and Bobby pretty well. Happy pulled in soon after. I gave him a hug and a kiss. I liked Happy, which for some was hard to do. Happy was easy to talk to, if you had the guts to go up and talk to him in the first place. Luanne showed up a few minutes later and she and Gemma were hanging out. Within the hour, the lot was full of motorcycles and fast cars. Opie would be around soon. I walked back inside and found Kenny and Ellie. The three of us walked out into the lot to wait for Opie. Jax picked up Ellie and put her on his shoulders. She laughed and threw her arms up in the air. My phone buzzed in my back pocket, a text from Donna, _two minutes away._

"They're two minutes away," I shouted, almost screeching.

"Are you ready?" Jax said, walking over with Ellie, a big smile on both of their faces.

"What kind of question is that," I said, laughing, "Our best friend and my brother-in-law is coming home. Tig found his place behind me and wrapped his arm around my waist again. I looked at him and smiled. He leaned in close and whispered in my ear, "Are the kids staying at your place tonight?"

"I can bum them off on Piney," I said, "Why? Gotta hot date?"

"You read my mind," he said.

_Tig always liked staying at Gracie's place… it was homier than his. He was there so often he'd might as well stay. He had his own drawer in the dresser and his own spot in the closet. He had always helped Gracie make payments and finally, pay it off. It was truly, their house._

Everyone looked over as a pair of headlights swept over the lot, it was Donna's car. I could see Three people, Piney's silhouette filling the back seat. The crowd surged closer to get a better look, it was like Opie was a celebrity. And, if a guy like Opie was just getting out of the big house, he would get treated like one tonight. Jax grabbed my hand and pulled Kenny and I closer, "Family first," he yelled.

The crowd parted and we walked closer. Opie jumped out of the car and stared at his kids. They stared back, acting shy and nervous, "Go," I whispered in their ears.

They ran up to him and he scooped them both up. Donna walked up to me and gave me a hug, "Congrats" I said, "Do you think Piney can take the kids tonight?" I glanced over at Tig who was waiting for Opie to get done with the kids.

"Oh," Donna smiled, "I gotcha, sure. I don't mind."

I heard Jax and Opie hug and turned around. "Hey!" I said, I finally got a good look at Opie. His beard was longer, a lot longer. Donna had taken his beanie that I had gotten him back in the day and he already had it on. He looked tired but, otherwise happy. I couldn't help it. I ran up to him and jumped, flinging myself onto him. "I missed you!" I said, laughing. I didn't realized that everyone else was staring and smiling.

"I missed you, too," he said, smiling and setting me down.

He gravitated toward Donna and the kids again and I toward Tig. I slipped my hand around his waist, under his cut, and smiled at him. "Let's go get some hot dogs," I said, turning and heading toward Bobby who was flipping some burgers and trying to crane his neck to see Opie but, the crowd had closed in and all I could see was his beanie.

I walked back in the clubhouse as Donna and Opie drove out of the parking lot. The room was full of sleeping bikers and girls strewn over them. Piney had taken Kenny and Ellie long ago and Gemma was getting ready to leave with Clay and get some sleep. Tig was still awake and talking to Happy, they had been talking all night, our "hot date" hadn't worked out as planned but, Tig was a man of his word and he would get the job done soon enough. Gemma walked out of the bathroom and smiled at me, "You looked so tired," she said, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear, "Go get some sleep… we'll come back later and clean up."

After that, Gemma left, shortly followed by Clay. I found Tig walking to his room, I trotted up behind him slipped a finger through his belt loop. "Hey baby," I said, pressing my body against him, Tig was always warm… not like, that weird 'Twilight' shit that Ellie was reading but, I could count on Tig to warm me up. I followed him into his room. I flopped down onto his bed and closed my eyes. I was so happy that Opie was home. I felt Tig crawl onto the bed and lay his head on my stomach; I ran my fingers through his curls. "Good party," I said, thinking more about my get together with David.

Tig grunted, letting me know he was falling asleep. _Good enough, _I thought. For now.


	4. Chapter 4

I had unpacked the last of Tig's boxes and finally plopped down on the couch with a glass of ice water. Tig had officially moved in and sold the house he owned across town. He had been busy with the club and the garage so, I ended up unpacking all of his stuff. Jax and Wendy were expecting the baby soon. We were all excited for that, except Tig. He thought that if I saw Jax with a baby that I would want one. Not so much, I was perfectly content with other people's kids… I could give them back when they got annoying. Opie was working in the lumber yard, staying away from the club. Donna really hated the cut but, she knew that it was a part of Opie. It always would be.

I was flipping through the channels (on Tig's big, flat screen television that had taken over my, our, living room) when my phone began to buzz around the table. It blinked "Gemma" across the front.

"Hey lady," I said, always glad to hear Gemma's voice.

"Hey baby," she said, sounding stressed, "I need you to try and get a hold of Jax… or anyone."

"What's going on," I said, my stomach instantly tying in knots, "Is someone hurt? Where's Tig?"

"Its Wendy," Gemma said, "Meet me at the garage."

Gemma ended the call and I jumped off the couch, grabbed my keys and headed for the car. I pulled into the garage right before Gemma did. Gemma was honking her horn, trying to get someone's attention. The guys came walking out and Gemma jumped out of her car. "Jax, we gotta get to the hospital. Its Wendy."

I looked at Tig and saw that the guys were already headed to their bikes. I pulled out of the parking lot and sped towards the Saint Thomas. I was out of my car when Tig pulled up next to me. I slipped my hand into Tig's, he squeezed it. I'm sure we looked menacing walking through the hallway of the hospital. Tara Knowles, Jax's old girlfriend, came around the corner and met us in front of Wendy's room. As Tara was telling Jax about Wendy's and Abel's conditions, I was doing everything it took to not go into Wendy's room and beat the ever-living daylights out of her. When I snapped back into the real world, Jax, Chibs and Bobby were out the door. "I can take you to see Abel now," Tara said.

Gemma, Clay, Tig and I all followed Tara down the hallway. The rest of the boys went back to the clubhouse. Tara held open a door to a small room. It was warm in there, muggy. In the middle of the room there was an incubator, in it, was Abel. He was so little; he didn't even look like a real baby. He had tubes going in and out of his little body. I never liked Wendy. But, this sealed the deal. I wiped away the tears that had fallen out of my eyes. "Hey," Tig said, he pulled my up to his chest with one arm, "Hey, it'll be okay. He'll make it."

"I'm just mad," I said, talking into his cut, "That stupid bitch. I wanna kill her."

"Yeah," Gemma said, still staring at Abel, "We all do."

Tig, Gemma and Clay left the room and I stayed back with Tara. "Thanks for taking this case," I said, I hadn't seen Tara since high school. We were good friends when Jax and her together, "I know Jax will appreciate it."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," Tara said.

I rode home with Tig on the bike. I couldn't get Abel out of my head, his little body. Wendy was gonna get it. Tig dropped me off at the house. "I'm going back to the garage," he said, "I don't know when we'll be done… this warehouse deal has really fucked things up."

"I know," I said, "See you later."

I kissed him and walked inside. I resumed my position on the couch and let myself fall asleep.

"_I'll gut them bitches," Tig said, finishing off his candy bar, "Just… don't mention it to Gracie, huh?"_

"_Fuck, Tigger," Clay said, knowing full well that Gracie would find out, "Jax is gonna find out. You best talk to him about not telling your girl. Just… just take care of it, okay?"_

_The men discussed the situation with Tig and the Mexicans in the warehouse. As soon as Clay had told the Club the situation, Opie and Jax said, in harmony, "Shit. Does Gracie know?"_

"_Of course… she doesn't," Tig said, keeping his eyes on the table._

"_What were you thinking, brother," Chibs chimed in. _

_Tig looked at Chibs with a tired face, "I was thinking about getting my dick sucked… twice."_

_Jax stared at Opie and then Opie stared at Tig. "If you want your dick sucked, you go and see your girl about it. Not some Mexi-whores lying around," Opie said, tapping his finger on the table. _

I watched the rides go around… spinning and rumbling and squeaking. Made me sick just thinking about them. Tig pushed me to the front of the line for the "Scrambler"… it looked more or less like the "Spinning, Spider-Web of Death" but, Tig was behind me which meant I had little to no chance of escaping. "C'mon baby," I whined, "It looks… horrible."

"It looks like fun to me," he laughed and kissed my cheek, "Suck it up, Gracie. It won't be so bad when we're making out on it."

I stared at Tig for a second, "I bet you won't be thinking that when I throw up in your face," I laughed, smacking his name on his cut.

I knew Tig wasn't a fan of throw up and, I could see it in his face, "I'm just kidding," I laughed, "You big baby… but, rides make me sick, you of all people should know that."

Tig pushed me toward the ride once again, gave the carnie our tickets and hopped on an inside cart. "Maybe we should leave the seatbelts off," Tig said, knowing full well that wasn't going to happen.

"Or, maybe," I said, reaching across Tig's lap, making sure my hand ran across the right spots, "We could make sure we were strapped in nice and tight." I clicked the seatbelt and pulled it against our laps.

Tig rested his arm on the back of the car and kissed my temple. I turned my head and kissed his lips, his scruff scratched my face. Clay's voice next to my ear made me jump, "Hey kids," he laughed, sticking his face between us, "Mommy and daddy are watching now."

Clay and Gemma climbed on one of the cars across from us. Tig looked at Clay, shook his head and resumed our previous activity. The ride started and made our bodies sway backwards. When it really got going, so did we.

"_They really go together, don't they," Clay said, staring at Tig and Gracie._

"_Yeah, Gracie loves Tig, no doubt about that," Gemma agreed, "But, you make sure that Tig doesn't fuck it up or that Hale doesn't get in the way. Okay?"_

"_I think we can handle that," Clay said, "But, I'd imagine that Jax and Opie will have Hale under control."_

By the end of the ride, some parents were giving us dirty looks and one mother was covering her daughters face. "Oh brother," I said, wiping my bottom lip off, "We weren't that bad… were we?"

Gemma came by, shaking her head, "Well, you were… focused."

Tig gave his little giggle, "You should see her when we're at home."

"Shut up," I retorted, my face turning red.

I looked around for something to do and David's face caught my eye. He was with some guy friends, laughing and had a beer in his hands. He also had a girl clinging to his side. He saw me staring and waved for me to come over. Tig saw it, too, and grabbed my hand, "C'mon, Gracie. Let's go."

I looked at Tig, "I'll only be a second."

He only nodded. I walked over to David and his friends. They all had on Polo shirts and jeans. College friends. "Hey Gracie," David said, smiling. He looked a little tipsy, he could never hold his beer. "These are some of my friends from school."

He introduced me and we talked for a bit. "And, who is this?" I asked, nodding to the blonde at David's side.

David's cheeks got a little pink, "This is… Candy,"

I snorted. David ignored me and went on.

"From… college."

I'm sure she was from college and, I'm sure her she majored in reverse cowgirl and Herpes.

"I bet," I laughed and shook my head, "I'll see you around. Good luck with…" I looked "Candy" up and down with as much disgust as I could, "That."

David looked pissed and Candy, well, she looked… more pissed. I turned around and walked back to Tig. "He still looking at me?" I asked, never turning around.

"Yeah," Tig said, staring right back at Tig, "Hasn't blinked."

"Kiss me," I said, flinging myself onto Tig.

"Aye, aye," Tig said, against my lips.

_Tig picked Gracie up; she wrapped her legs around him. Probably a little too much for a Carnival but, it was called Fun Town and this was definitely fun, Tig laughed in between kisses. He enjoyed pissing Hale off. "Still looking," Gracie asked again. _

"_Well, not exactly," Tig said, peaking over Gracie's shoulder._

_Gracie jumped down and looked at Hale. _

I turned around to see what David's face would look like. Unfortunately, it was smashed into Candy's face. My shoulders sagged. Mission failed.

_Tig could tell that Gracie was going to be upset. That wasn't going to happen. "What's her name?" Tig asked Gracie._

"_Candy," Gracie replied._

"Let's go," I started to turn around but, Tig was taking a few steps toward David.

"Hey, Candy," Tig yelled, I wrapped my hand around his arm, getting ready to pull him back. David and Candy stopped their spit swap and looked Tig's way. "You still got that infection? You know… down there?"

I laughed. Tig turned around and through his arm around my shoulder and kissed my head. "Let's get outta here, baby girl," he said.

"Fine with me," I said, I slipped my arm under his cut.

Gemma and Clay had gone to get something to drink and were sitting at a picnic table. Tig and I joined them and we sat around talking for awhile. Soon, Juice, Bobby, Chibs and Jax came to join us. They didn't sit down.

Juice leaned down and whispered into Clay's ear; Clay nodded and looked at Tig. "Time to go," Clay said, snapping into his business tone of voice.

Tig stood up and bent over me, so that his arms were on either side of me, "Don't be out too late," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck, "I've got plans for you."

Tig kissed me on the forehead, "See you later," he said, walking away with the rest of the guys that had joined up.

"I'm gonna go to the hospital for a bit and see Abel," I said, standing up, "You wanna come?" I asked Gemma.

Gemma looked at her watch, "Yeah," she said, "Luanne is here… gonna wait for her to get done. We'll meet you there."

I walked into the hospital and up to the wing where Abel was. I walked into his room, Tara was already there, looking into the incubator at him. "Hey," I said, in almost a whisper.

"Hey, Gracie," Tara said, "How are you? Haven't seen you much since I got back in town."

I kept my eyes on Abel, "You mean since you left Jax?"

Tara kept her eyes low, too, "Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"Well, other than this guy," I nodded toward Abel, "I'm pretty good."

Tara sat down in one of the rocking chairs in the room. "You and David… didn't work out?"

I sat in a chair next to her, "Not so much."

Tara and I talked for the next hour, catching up on the years that she had been out of Charming. Gemma showed up with Luanne after awhile. Tara left the room pretty quickly. "I'm having a dinner at my place tonight," Gemma said, "You best be there."

"What should I bring," I said, giving her and Luanne a hug.

We stayed in Abel's room for a little bit. When we left, Gemma made a pit stop in Wendy's room, she made us wait outside.

It had been a few months since Abel was born and he was finally coming home today. Gemma was putting a big party together and was inviting almost everyone who lived in Charming.

_Tig and Clay sat on the picnic table, looking out into the parking lot of the Teller-Morrow garage. "Gotta be tonight. Make it ghetto, make it gangster," Clay said._

_Tig took a deep breath. "You got it."_

I sat on the couch with Piney and Kenny. Piney was trying to do a trick with a cup on Kenny's head but, he was failing miserably. Tig walked in and sat next to me, slinging his arm around my shoulders. I snuggled in for a night of laughing with my family. "Have you talked to mom and dad lately?" Donna asked.

"No," I laughed, our parents had packed up and bought a condo in Florida about six months before Abel was born. We hadn't heard much from them since. "They are pretty preoccupied with golf and trimming their lawn."

Donna and I didn't talk much anymore, either. She really didn't like Tig but, she dealt with it. It was weird seeing her here with everyone. Tig and I sat and talked with Chibs and Bobby for awhile. Joking and laughing. Tig seemed distant though and it was bugging me. He got up to grab another beer from the kitchen and I followed him, "Something on your mind, baby," I said, leaning against the counter.

"Club stuff," Tig said, taking a swig of cold beer, "Nothing to worry about."

"If you wanna talk, we can," I said, giving him a hug.

Tig buried his face in my neck and squeezed me harder than usual. "Its ok," Tig said.

We walked out of the kitchen as Jax walked in the door with Abel. Everyone's attention turned to the father and son and any worries were put on the back burner.

Opie dropped me off at my house in Donna's car, Tig wanted to stay with Clay. "See you guys later," I said, shutting the car door behind me. I walked inside and changed into some pajamas. I curled up of the couch and flipped on the television, and waited for Tig to get home.

_The red and blue lights from the police cars and the ambulance flashed across their faces. Tig and Clay watched from behind the yellow tape as the paramedics lifted Donna's body into the ambulance. David asked Jax some questions and talked with Unser. When David turned around, he locked eyes with Tig. "Shit," David said, "Gracie."_

_Tig read David's lips and he knew he had to get to the house before Hale did. Hale ran to his jeep and Tig to his bike. "Here we go," Clay said under his breath has both sides of the law raced toward the same girl._

I had dozed off on the couch and a knock at the door startled me awake. I sleepily walked to the door and was surprised to see David. "What do you want?" I said, groggily.

_Tig screeched to halt in the driveway. He saw Gracie open the door, "Hale!" Tig shouted and ran up to the door. He didn't see the look on Gracie's face until after Hale left with a busted cheek and a broken nose. Tig walked in the house and found Gracie sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall in the hallway. _

Hot tears poured down my face but, my body was numb. Tig was talking to me, holding my face in his warm hand but, all I could do was stare at him. A moment later, I was sobbing into Tig's chest. His cut muffling my sobs and his "Sergeant at Arms" patch soaking up my tears. "I'm sorry," Tig said, "I'm so sorry."

I woke up blinking into the warm sunshine that fell through the bedroom window. Tig sat on the edge of the bed, next to me. He looked like he had tried to get dressed. He had his pants on but, hadn't gotten them buttoned or his belt buckled. He wore no shirt but, it sat on the bed next to him. I watched him, as he stared down at his hands that rested on his lap. I slipped my hand into his. He jumped a little, and turning around to face me. "How are you?" Tig said quietly, brushing the hair out of my face.

I grabbed his hand and pressed it against my face, my eyes burning with tears again. "I don't know,"

Tig lay down beside me and pulled me close. I fell asleep again, letting my tears run into his chest hair.

After three days of crying and sleeping, I finally made it out of bed. I took a long needed and shower and brushed my teeth. My face was pale and dark circles stood out below my eyes. I walked out into the kitchen and poured a cup of coffee. I looked at my phone and I was impressed by the number of missed calls from every member of the Sons of Anarchy. None of them from Opie, which worried me. Tig walked in the room, "Gemma was here earlier but, you were asleep," he said, giving me a hug and kissing the top of my head.

"Take me to Opie's house," I said, wanting to be with my family. Tig hesitated for a moment, "Let's go to the clubhouse… the funeral is today."

"What?" I said, not knowing what to think, had it been that long?

"You were… not here." Tig said, staring out the window, "Your parents have the funeral planned out. We just have to go to it."

"I… I can't believe this is happening to me," I said, sitting down at the table. I rested my head in my hands.

"Let's get out of here, Gracie," Tig said, pulling my hands away from my face and kiss the inside of each of them, "You need some sunshine and fresh air."

I nodded my head and let Tig lead me out the door. The wind whipped my hair out of the ponytail but, I made no effort to control it. I pulled myself closer and buried my face in Tig's back and closed my eyes, trying to let any stress fly off the back of the bike. We pulled into Teller-Morrow and my mouth fell open, a sea of bikes and leather clad men filled the parking lot to the brim, "They're here for you and Ope," Tig said, nodding and waving to a few of them. We rolled to a stop and I hopped off the bike. I turned around and kissed him, "I'll meet you inside," he said.

_Tig watched Gracie walk into the clubhouse and disappear into the darkness. His stomach turned once again as he thought about what he had done and who he was hurting. He had never felt like this before and he didn't like it. This guilt would eat him alive._

I walked into the clubhouse. It was packed with people and smelled of leather and booze. It was quiet though, a low murmur of voices. No one turned around but, I caught Clay's face in the crowd. When he saw me he quickly stood up and pushed his way through the crowd. The rest of the Redwood Originals' followed him. Everyone turned and watched Clay walk up to me with open arms. I fell into his hug and let him hold me. "I am so sorry," he whispered into my ear.

I moved around the room, from hug to hug. Chibs, Bobby, Piney and finally I found my way into Tig's embrace. By then, hot tears coated my face again. "Where's Jax," I asked, trying to keep my voice level.

"Roof," Bobby said, handing me a drink.

I knew when Jax needed to think, he would head to the roof of the garage. We used to hold secret meeting up there when we were kids. I made my way out of the clubhouse and saw Jax sitting above everyone, looking down over the crowd. I climbed the ladder up to the flat roof, "Hey," I said, Jax 's head jerked up and his face fell.

"Gracie," he said, his voice low and somber. He stood up and walked up to me, "I'm sorry… I don't… know what to do."

"I know that Opie needs us," I said.

"I can't get a hold of him," Jax said, pulling me down to sit next to him.

I leaned my head on Jax's shoulder, "Remember… when we used to play up here? And…" I sucked in a ragged breath, "And, Donna used to want to come up but, we would never let her?"

"Yeah…" Jax said, trying to laugh.

A sob burst from my lips, "We should have let her." I cried into Jax's shoulder and he put his arm around me. We stayed like this until I stopped.

Jax nodded to a car that pulled into the parking lot, "Those your parents?" he asked.

"Looks like it," I said, not ready to deal with them.

My parents got out of the car. I couldn't tell from where I was but, they looked somewhere between frightened and disgusted. "Best go see what they need to complain about."

"Hey," Jax said, grabbing my arm, "Its gonna be okay."

"I know," I said, trying to give Jax a reassuring smile.

My parents, Tig and I sat at the table in the room where Sons of Anarchy had church. My mother kept her eyes on the table, while my father glared at Tig. Clay came in the room and shut the doors, taking a seat at the head of the table. He rubbed his eyes and leaned back in his chair, "We'll… pay for everything."

"No, Clay," I said, taking another ragged deep breath, "We can handle it."

"I've already collected the money," Clay said, holding up a big hand, "No way around it. I'll leave you all to talk about arrangements."

I watched Clay leave, when he opened the door, I saw Gemma holding Opie surrounded by Jax and the rest of the club. Piney was holding Kenny and Chibs had Ellie.

I turned back around to look at my parents, "What do we do?"

I slipped my hand into Tig's, watching my parents lips curl up with disgust. My father stared at me with so much hatred, I thought that I might die. His voice was low and rough, "This…. This thing. Is on you."

I stared at my parents, my mouth hanging open. I tried to suck in a breath but, I couldn't. "What?" I said, my voice was barely a whisper. Tig's hands had curled into fists and his eyes stared into my parents faces. My father looked us both up and down, "If you… hadn't gone off with the people. Become what you are, your sister would still be alive. It will only be a matter of time before you end up like her. When they become tired of their whore-"

"Whoa… whoa." Tig said, holding up his hands, "This is not the time and definitely not the place to be talking like that."

"You…" my father said, his voice a harsh whisper, "You killed her. You piece of trash. You and your biker whore that calls herself my daughter-"

My father never finished his sentence. Tig flew across the table and began pounding my fathers face with one fist and holding his neck with another. My mother screamed and Jax and Bobby came running into the room. I heard Jax yell, "Holy Shit."

My father's face was bloody and my mother and him ran out of the clubhouse. My mother couldn't look at me and she never said one word. They sped out of the parking lot and took a right for the highway.

I stood up and walked through the crowd and into Tig's room. I sat down on the bed and stared at the hallway. Tig stepped into my line of vision but, all I could do was move my eyes to his. I heard a few people walking down the hall but, Tig held up a bloodied hand and the footsteps faded away. I swallowed the lump in my throat, took a breath and stood up. "You're hands, let me clean them up."

I walked into the bathroom and wetted a washcloth with cool water. Tig sat down on the edge of the bathtub. I sat down on the floor in front of him and wiped the blood off of his hands. We sat in silence.

"Baby," Tig said, "Look at me… I'm so-" 

"Tig," I said, cutting him off, "I'm alright."

I stood up and held out my hand, Tig's hand, now clean, enveloped it and I instantly felt better. "I need to see them."

Tig led me into the clubhouse room again, and all eyes were on us. "Go back to your business," Jax said as I stopped and stared at Opie. Everyone turned around and ignored us. Opie covered the distance between us in two strides and pulled me into him. I felt his breath on my neck and tears hit my shoulders. "Hey," I said, holding Opie tight to me, "Don't… don't cry. We're all together now… its going to be ok."

_Clay came up to Tig and gave him a pat on the back. Tig watched as Opie and Gracie comforted the kids and each other. Clay felt bad but, Tig felt horrible._

_Tig took grabbed a bottle of tequila and took a swig, "What have I done"_


	5. Chapter 5

The days passed slowly. But, each day was a little easier to get out of bed, a little easier to crack a smiled. Tig spent most of his time at the clubhouse, I saw little of him. I painted the house, a fresh coat of white made everything clean and new again. I kept myself occupied with Kenny and Ellie, distracting them and myself. I watched Abel and went shopping with Tara. We had grown closer in the last few weeks. We all had, me and Opie, the Club; we all took care of each other, looked out for each other a little more.

"You coming to Bobby's party tonight?" Tig asked me one morning while I made him breakfast.

"Yeah," I said, setting down a plate of sausage and eggs, "I'll be there, wouldn't miss it."

Tig pulled me down onto his lap and kissed me. I looked at him and pulled a bit of egg out of his scruff. "You should come home more often," I said, looking at him, "I miss you."

Tig was silent for a moment, "We're just busy… club shit… garage is full."

"I understand," I said, getting up and finding my own chair. I lit a cigarette, a bad habit I had picked up when all this shit started.

"You could come help out at the garage if you wanted," Tig said, "I know Gem could use it. I wouldn't mind having you around." 

"Okay," I said, "I'm not sure how much help I'd be but, I'll come."

"Go get dressed," Tig said, throwing the last piece of bacon into his mouth, "You're coming with."

"Aye, aye captain," I said, getting up and walking pass Tig, I laughed when I slapped my butt.

We rode together on Tig's bike, something we hadn't done in awhile. I wished that the ride hadn't been so short, that we could have gone on together like that all day. I hadn't been to the garage since the funeral. I was walked into the big, open garage doors next to Tig and was immediately scooped into a bear hug from Chibs. "How are ya, kid?" Chibs said, setting me down and looking at me above his sunglasses.

"Good, I'm good," I said, smiling, "Where's Jax and Opie? Where's Clay?" I asked, noticing some of the members were missing.

"Out and about," Piney said, "Taking care of business."

I hugged everyone else and went into the office where Gemma was working. She looked up from her paperwork, "Gracie," she smiled, stood up, and pulled me into a gently hug, "I missed you. Where have you been?"

"At home," I said, sitting down in one of the chairs, "Taking care of Kenny and Ellie… and, Tig."

"Well," Gemma said, patting a stack of papers and putting me right to work, "Take these out to the boys and divide them up, everybody is gonna be working today."

"Sounds like this is going to be a great time," I said, walking out into the garage. I tossed each boy their paperwork and sat next to Tig, hopping up on his work bench.

"These, are for you," I said, handing them to Tig.

"Thanks," he said, patting my knee.

_Tig watched Gracie move around the garage, passing out the to-do lists to everyone. The corner of Tig's mouth pulled up as he watched how she made everyone smile, made everyone laugh. He watched how she moved her body, kept her torso always facing him. How her eyes glanced over at him and when he would catch her, how she would blush. "Damn," he thought, "This is gonna be long term."_

I walked back into the office where Gemma sat, filling out some paperwork. She looked at me over the top of her glasses and grinned, "You two ever gonna get hitched?" she asked.

"Who?" I asked, staring at Gemma, "Oh! You mean, Tig and I?"

"Well, I didn't mean you and Clay," Gemma laughed.

"Oh," I laughed, "I think Tig is happy right where we are."

"And, where are you?" Gemma asked.

"Here," I said, leaning against the door and watching Tig, he was welding some sort of car part, leaning against the work bench, he looked good, "Here is nice."

"You should see the way you two watch each other," Gemma said, resuming her paperwork, "It's almost disgusting."

"Almost," I said, still watching Tig.

I stayed at the clubhouse until the party. Laughing and joking with the guys as they worked on various cars. The sun set and the asphalt cooled off, the lot started to fill up with bikes. I recognized only a couple. Tig seemed to know them all. He was quite the celebrity amongst the MC and, it made me laugh. Tig walked through the crowd shaking hands and giving hugs. Women tried to walk up to him but, he always laughed and pointed at me. At first, they gave me dirty looks but, soon realized that with Gemma and Luanne on either side of me, I wasn't going to lose that one. At first, I hadn't realized my status in the MC but, after a few years of Tig and always being close to Jax and Opie, I saw that I was the Vice President to Gemma's presidency.

We all turned our heads to the car that had pulled into the parking lot, spreading the crowd in half. Bobby jumped out of the car and slammed himself into a hug with everyone around him. I put myself in the line, trying to get a good spot. I didn't want to greet a drunken Bobby which, he already looked like he was on the road to being. "Bobby," I said, laughing as he scooped me up with one arm, balancing a cup of beer in the other.

"I missed you, Gracie," Bobby said, spinning me around.

"When are you going to make me some muffins?" I asked

"As soon as I get past tonight's hangover," he laughed, setting me down and walking to the next group of hugs.

We all settled in for the rest of the night, Tig and I sat next to Gemma and Clay. Talking and laughing. We hadn't done that in awhile. I sat on the top of the picnic table and Tig sat himself on the seat, situated between my legs. I ran a finger down his neck and instantly felt him relax. That one move, that one touch was like a Vulcan nerve pinch and if I kept it up, Tig would have been snoring in five minutes. After a few hours of drinking and goofing around, a shiny BMW pulled into the lot. A man stepped out, he was wearing a suit, his hair was gray and he wore a smirk to match his clothing. Three other men got out of the car as well, although, their idea of dressed up was not the same as the man that led them toward Clay. His "body guards" were covered in tattoos and their faces were dark, I didn't trust them. "Who's that," I said, getting up and following Gemma as she followed Tig and Clay.

"Ethan Zobelle," Chibs said, behind me, "White power."

"Must be new in Charming," I said, instantly disliking him.

Gemma had stopped and pulled me back when I went to stand by Tig, "You wait here, with me."

"I forget sometimes," I said, absentmindedly. I was watching Tig, carefully. I was ready to pounce if anyone raised a finger. Not that Tig couldn't handle himself but, I could take the scrawny one on the end.

Gemma and I watched as Clay got extremely close to Zobelle's face and Tig did the same with one of the men stood closest to him. I stepped forward but, Gemma pulled me back again, as every man that was in the parking lot took a step closer to Clay and Tig.

"What was that about," Gemma asked, as the car pulled away.

"Just a newcomer," Clay said, "Figuring out his spot in the Totem Pole."

…

A few weeks after Gemma's accident, I was home alone when Unser walked in the door. "Hey Gracie," he said, I handed him a cup of coffee, "How are ya?"

"I'm doing fine," I said, sitting down next to him, "Is there something you needed to talk about?"

"Yeah," Unser said, rubbing his face, he looked stressed and worn out, he had dark circles under his sweet eyes, "We need you to come into the station, just ask ya a couple of questions… about Donna."

"Okay," I said, standing up, "Take me in."

"Whoa," Unser laughed, "You can come in whenever, I just wanted to come in and check on you myself."

"Thanks, Chief," I smiled, "I'll be in, in an hour."

Unser walked out the door, "Oh, and," he laughed, "I saw Mr. Trager gave Hale a good beating. Broke his nose, in two different spots. Probably deserved it."

I shook my head, "I'll see you at the station."

I drove to the police station and walked inside. ATF agents filled the halls and Agent Stahl walked out of David's office. She saw me and walked towards me, I did my best to ignore her and I walked past.

"Gracie," she said, walking up to me.

I kept my eyes forward and pushed by, "I have nothing to say to you."

I walked up to one of the desks, "Excuse me," I said, "Where is Chief Unser? He wanted me to come in and answer a few questions about Donna Winston."

My sister's name was getting easier to say, everyday, the more I heard it and the more I said it.

The lady, a blonde skinny-bitch who I had never liked, didn't look up from her paperwork, "Talk to Deputy Hale. Unser isn't here."

"Lovely," I said, I turned around and walked to David's office, I knocked on the door.

"Hello, Gracie," David said, closing a file, "C'mon in. This is just gonna take a few minutes."

David's face was healing but, he still shadows under his eyes from the bruises. I wouldn't have expected David to recover so quickly from such a meeting from Tig but, I wouldn't have expected a lot of things to happen that did.

"Do you have any leads at all," I said, after David asked me some questions.

"Well," David said, closing the folder, "The only one we have right now is that," he paused and looked at me, "Clay Morrow made a horrible mistake."

"Excuse me?" I said, appalled that David would tell me that, even if I had asked.

"ATF had Opie's truck bugged," he said, leaning back in his chair, "Along with his phone. Clay must have found it."

I stood up and walked out the door. "Gracie," David said, standing up, "Come here."

I turned on my heel, "What do you want?"

"I want you to be careful," David said, "You're running with a crowd that's getting dangerous… for you."

I poked my finger into his chest, "You're the one who needs to be careful."

I called Jax on his cell phone, "We need to talk," I said, pulling out of the police station and heading toward the clubhouse, "I'm on my way."

All the way to the garage, the thought of SAMCRO being the reason for Donna's murder ate at my mind. What if Clay had put a hit out on Opie? I sucked in a breath, Tig would have been the one. Tig would have done it. It made me sick to think that the people I cared for most in the world had killed my sister. That the club that had taken care of me and that I had grown up with had killed my sister. My stomach flipped and turned and tied into knots all the way to the garage. I slammed my car door shut and stomped through the garage, ignoring the greetings from the guys and pushing Tig's hands out of the way. "Where's Jax," I asked.

"Inside," Tig said, "Why?"

"Nothing," I said.

Jax walked out of the church room, "In here, Gracie," he said.

I turned around to Tig, I'll be out in a minute," I said, "We just gotta talk." I tried to calm down as much as possible but, I couldn't look Tig in the eyes. I was afraid of what I would see. He walked up to me but, I pushed my hand into his chest, stopping him, "Go away."

Jax shut the doors and sat down next to me. "What's going on, Gracie," Jax asked.

"Did SAMCRO kill Donna? Did Clay kill Donna?" I asked, staring at Jax.

"Shit," Jax said, he leaned back in his chair and put his hands on his head, "You really wanna know what I think?"

"I wanna know," I started, "What the fuck happened and why… _why _did it land on my family," I told Jax what had happened with David.

Jax stared at me and took my hands in his, "I think he's right, Gracie. I know he is. And, you and I both know who carried out that hit."

I hundred different emotions hit me all at once. I trusted Jax, more than anything or anyone, probably more than Opie. I knew that if he believed this was true, it was.

"Gracie," Jax said, "Look at me… we cannot tell Opie. Do you understand?"

I nodded.

I stood up and pushed open the doors. Jax didn't try and stop me. My hands were shaking and I could feel the blood rushing to my face, heating it up. All the guys were waiting outside; wanting to know what was going on. Tig sat on the edge of the pool table. He stood up and walked toward me, grabbing my arm, "Hey," he said, "What's going on?"

I turned around and looked at him. I looked right into his eyes, searching for any sign that maybe, just maybe, Tig hadn't done it and none of what I had learned was true. I saw nothing. My hand came up and flew across Tig's face, making a red hand print appear on his cheek. I hit him again, this time with the back of my hand. Hot tears spilled onto my cheeks.

His eyes grew wide and he let go of his grip on my other arm, letting it fall to my side. I turned around slowly and walked out the door. "Stupid bitch," I heard Tig say.

I didn't turn around but, I heard a scuffle and Bobby say, "Whoa, Tigger, let her go."

"No bitch hits me," I heard Tig say, "Let go of me. I'll show her who hits who, dumb slut."

My face flushed red with rage and I stomped back into the clubhouse, "You wanna hit me, Tig?" I screamed, letting all the emotions from the past weeks come out of my mouth in a screech. It looked like Tig was doing the same. "You wanna hurt me?" I spat, "Wanna teach me a lesson?" I screamed at Tig's red face, my voice cracked and more tears spilled out of my eyes. Tig's face twisted into rage, his neck muscles flexed as he tried to get out of Chibs' and Juice's grip and a vein pulsed in his forehead, "Go head," I began again, "Teach me a lesson."

Juice and Chibs were struggling to hold Tig, while Jax wrapped one arm around my stomach, letting me get no closer to Tig, who began to yell across the room, "I'll be the shit out of you!"

Opie and Clay ran into the clubhouse, Tig almost got loose of Juice and Chibs when Ope ran over and pushed him back. Clay walked over to Jax, 'What the hell is going on in here?" he yelled over Tig and I screaming at each other.

"Gracie," Jax replied, pulling me back, away from Tig, "She hit Tig. Set them both off."

I clawed at Jax's arms, trying to loosen his grip. "Let me go," I yelled, "Let the bastard hit me, he's nothing but a sack of shit."

I swung my arm up and grabbed a tall beer glass off the pool table, flinging it in Tig's direction, it smashed across his chest, covering Chibs and Tig with beer and glass, "Go fuck yourself, Tig," I hollered.

Tig stopped struggling and smiled, "Don't have to, I've got all the whores I need right here," he said, spreading out his arms, "Good ole SAMCRO supplying me with all the pussy I can pound. In fact, I had a few of those sluts last night. Trust me baby, I don't need you."

There it was. He had said it. The thing that he knew would hit at the very center of me. I stared at Tig and let my arms fall to my side, "You son of a bitch," I said, I knew this day would come, I didn't think it would be now. Not when all this shit was happening.

Tig stared at me. I stared back at him but, I wasn't really seeing. Chibs and Juice stared at me, their eyes as big as saucers. Opie and Jax glared at Tig. I pushed Jax's hand off of me and walked out the door, blinking when the bright, California sun hit my face. The parking lot, the building and the world around me began to melt away. My chest felt tight and I couldn't breathe, my heart hurt. Every time I blinked, I saw Donna's face, her body, her coffin. I imagined all the women Tig had been with. My legs turned to liquid and I fell to the hot, hard asphalt. The top half of my body began to fall backwards and I felt my head knock against the ground. A sharp pain began to radiate from the back of my head but, I ignored it. I opened my eyes and laid on the warm ground. I heard Jax scream my name from a million miles away. I turned my head up to the cloudless blue sky and watched the black and red spots bounce across my eyes. I blinked again, more slowly, and when I opened them, Jax was kneeling down next to me. Chibs, Clay, Opie and Juice were all standing above me. "Call Tara," Jax said, touching the back of my head. He brought his hand up and I saw dark, sticky blood on his fingers. Juice disappeared from above me and I let my head fall to the side, watching him run into the garage. I tried to speak, tried to move but, my body or my brain, I didn't know, wouldn't let me. There was a man standing in the doorway.

I heard two screeching tires and saw David's jeep pull into the parking lot. He jumped out and ran over. The group spread out as David knelt down beside me, I saw his mouth move but, I couldn't hear what he was saying. I felt my body being lifted from the ground; I let my head fall against the chest of the body that was holding me. It wasn't leather. David.

Finally, everything went dark and I fell into a world of silence and sleep.

_Tig came home and found half of the closet had been cleaned out. Only one toothbrush, only one cell phone charger. Half the drawers in the dresser hung open, empty. Tig sat on the edge of his side of the bed and rested his head in his hands. Without thinking, he picked up the lamp on the nightstand and threw it across the room; it shattered over the carpet and left a whole in the wall. _


	6. Chapter 6

"She took a pretty good whack to the back of her head," I heard Tara's voice say, "She should have gone to the hospital but, she'll be fine."

"Thanks for coming so soon," I heard Jax say.

I took a deep breath and opened my eyes. I was lying on my side and it didn't take long for me to realize how bad my head hurt. I rolled on to my back and sat up slowly. I winced as my head rose off the pillow. Jax, David and Tara were in the bedroom. "Where are we?" I asked, my voice hoarse.

"My place," David said, he was leaning against the dresser with his arms folded.

_David stared at Gracie, laying in his bed. Her face was pale and her eyes were red, from crying. The dark circles under her eyes made her look sick. She looked around the room, her eyes glassy with tears. If he could, he would have gone over to Trager's with a couple of his tasers and taught him a lesson… more than once. But, he knew that his place was here. He wasn't going to let Gracie get hurt again, not while he was around. Not while he was alive. _

"Could I have a glass of water?" I asked.

"Yeah, baby," Gemma said, walking into the hallway

Tara handed David a bottle of pills, "Give these to her if it gets too painful. But, limit her intake. If she gets sick, bring her to the hospital. I have to go back in for awhile. Call me if you have any questions," Tara turned to me, "Try and take it easy, Gracie," she said, zipping up her bag, "Move slow for the next couple of days. No bikes. I will take the stitches out in a couple weeks."

I tried to laugh but, my head pounded. I lay back down on the pillow and closed my eyes.

"Thanks," David said.

There was a scuffling out in the hallway, "Lemme take it to her," I heard Juice say.

"No," Chibs retorted, "I wanna take it in there."

I heard Bobby's laugh, "Would you two shut up?"

Gemma walked in the room and I saw the three guys peak in behind her. "Hey boys," I said.

Chibs, Bobby and Juice filed in behind Gemma. "How ya feelin' kid?"

"Like shit," I said, sitting up again and taking the water from Gemma.

"Let's get out of here," Jax said, standing up.

He kissed me on the head, gently. Chibs and Bobby did the same, both of them being careful when they touched me. Juice came up and kissed my cheek. "Be careful, Gracie," Juice said.

Jax let the three of them go out first. He looked at David, Gemma and finally me. "You call me," he said, "If you need anything. Anything at all."

"Thanks, Jax," I said, "Where is he?"

"Doesn't matter," Jax said, "You stay away from him," Jax walked out into the hallway and I listened as he walked out the door.

Gemma stood up and followed Jax, she kissed me, "I love you, Gracie."

"Love you, too Gem," I said.

I watched her leave, too. David picked up a duffle bag and set it next to me. "Gemma brought a lot of your things over. Some pajamas are in there for you."

"Where is your spare bedroom?" I asked, "I can put my things in there."

"I don't have one," David said, he walked over the closet and pulled out some blankets and took a pillow -off the bed, "You sleep in here, I'll sleep on the couch."

"No," I said, "You sleep in here. It's your bed."

David laughed, closing the door, "Go to sleep, Gracie."

I put my pajamas on and walked out into the hallway. I stopped and looked at all the pictures, David's mom Nancy, no doubt had hung up on the wall. Most of them were family portraits but, a few contained pictures of David and I. One made me smile, David had his football pads and jersey on, his scrawny neck poked out from his shoulders and his big ears made me laugh. It was from homecoming our senior year. I wore a little black dress and my big, poofy hair puffed out to my shoulders and fell to my back. We had big goofy grins on our faces. I wished we could go back to that, when all we had to worry about was our parents catching us sneaking in and out of each other's houses. I heard the television going and I found David sprawled out on the couch, flipping through the channels. "Hey," I said, making David jump.

"Gracie," he said, sitting up. He let the blanket fall off of him, I grinned a little when I saw he was wearing his boxers. His body was definitely not the same as Tig's, "You should be sleeping" he said.

"Not tired," I said, sitting next to him. I winced, I'd have to get used to being careful, "What's on?" I asked pointing to the television.

"Not much at this hour," David said, leaving the channel at Sports Center. Not much had changed.

After a few minutes my, "not tired" excuse was clearly fading. I felt my head nod and my eye lids slip closed. I would jump awake when David would grunt or laugh at the television. "Go to bed," David kept saying.

"Not… tired," I yawned.

I leaned over and took David's blanket and wrapped up in it. I rested my head against David's shoulder. "Let's get you to bed," David said, he stood up and picked me up, blanket and all. He carried me to the bedroom and set me down pulling back the covers. "See you in the morning," he said, walking away.

I grabbed his hand and he turned around to look at me. "Just sleep in the bed, David," I said, "It's not that big of a deal. I've seen you in less."

I patted the other side of the bed and David walked over and crawled in. I turned over and faced him on my side. He did the same. "You think our parents will hear us?" I smiled.

"Only when you snore," he laughed and pushed a ringlet of hair out of my face.

"I don't snore," I said, yawning again.

"You do, too," he laughed.

I let my eyes close and drifted off to sleep. That night I dreamt of Tig. I dreamt that I followed him the night of Donna's party. I saw him pull up behind her and I tried to honk my horn and scream but, no sound could come out. I opened the car and, in slow motion, I ran to Tig's car. He wore a mask; I reached in and touched his face. I felt the warmth through the mask where his mouth was. He pushed me out of the way as he put his arm out the window. I saw the gun and I turned to run to Donna but, I saw the bullets fly past me and I stopped and watched Donna's body go limp. I turned around and Tig was walking toward me now. His mask was off and he was smiling. He held up the gun to me and fired.

"No," I screamed as I sat up in bed. My face was wet with tears and David was next to me, staring.

"You okay?" he said.

"Just a dream," I said but, my voice cracked when I started to cry.

I closed my eyes and saw Tig's smiling face and the gun again. I jumped out of the bed and ran into the bathroom and threw up. David ran in after me. I layed on the floor and let every emotion I'd kept bottled up, out. I sobbed and gasped for breath. David sat down next to me and held me. "He did it,David," I cried, "He did it." David didn't say anything.

David walked me back to the bed. My head was on fire. I stayed sitting while David crawled into the bed. He lay back down on the bed and kept his hand on my back. My head pounded. I rubbed my eyes and lay down next to David. This time, I let him pull me close. I slept soundly the rest of the night.

_Tig grunted as he came. The bleach blonde girl looked up at him and grinned. Tig lifted his head up from the bed. "Get outta here," he said, buttoning up his pants. He grabbed the bottle of booze that sat half-empty on the nightstand. It clinked against the other empty ones that filled it._

"_You serious," the girl asked, standing up._

"_Do I look like I'm kidding? Go." Tig said, closing his eyes and taking a swig from the bottle._

"_Dick," the girl said, closing the door._

_Tig snorted at the girls smart remark. She wouldn't be around much longer. Tig closed his eyes and saw Gracie's face. _Get out of my head, _Tig thought, rubbing his eyes. He took another drink from the bottle and drifted off to sleep._

"I'll go to the hospital with you," Gemma said, her face still slightly bruised, "I need someone sane to talk to."

"Thanks," I said, running my fingers across the back of my head. The gash had finally healed.

I met Gemma at the hospital and we walked into a room with Tara. I sat on the table as Tara started to work on my stitches. We talked about Abel for awhile and how Wendy was doing. Finally, the conversation changed to the club. We talked about everyone except one. I hated beating around the bush. "How's Tig," I finally said, looking at the tile floor.

"He's okay," Gemma said, "He's drinking a lot… screwing around."

"Literally, screwing around," Tara said, taking out a stitch.

"Tara," Gemma said.

"No…" I interrupted, "its better you tell me the truth."

"Have you seen him? At all," Gemma asked, "Since it happened?"

"No," I said, staring at my fingers, "I've been avoiding him. I don't know if I can look at him… after what he's done to us…"

Gemma eyes flashed and I knew, she knew what had really set me off. I saw her realize what kind of information I knew, things that could bring her husband and the Sons of Anarchy down. Tara saw the looks we were giving each other. Gemma didn't look away, "Give us a second, Tara."

Tara nodded and walked out. Gemma stood up and walked up to me. Tears had started to fall onto my legs, making dark spots on my jeans. Gemma put her hands on either side of my face, pulling it up until our eyes met. "You know what really happened then?" she asked.

"Yeah," I said, "I haven't told anyone."

"Good," Gemma said, "You keep it that way."

"I know," I said, pulling my face out of Gemma's hands, "I know what to do." A fresh sob found its way out of my mouth. I was so sick of crying.

"I'm so sorry," Gemma said, pulling me in close to her, "I'm sorry."

Gemma held me for a bit, until stopped sobbing. She took a step back and looked at me, "Does he know?"

"No," I said, wiping off my face with one of the course hospital Kleenexes, "I can't think about him. When I think about it… it makes me sick."

"I know, baby," Gemma said, pulling me close, "But, you have to think of it like the men would. They thought they were doing what had to be done. You can't hold it against one, for doing the work for everyone. That's Tig's job… Clay doesn't realize what a toll that takes on him. But, Tig is like a stupid fucking puppy and he'll do whatever Clay asks, without a second thought."

After another breakdown in the hospital room, I went back to the clubhouse with Gemma and Tara for a drink. Piney joined us. "How's the noggin, Gracie," he said, scooping me up into a hug.

I looked around and saw that nothing had changed. The mug shots on the wall, the pool table, the stain on the floor where Half Sack had left the deer head. It was empty, no women, no men and thankfully, no Tig. I couldn't be around him right now.

"Better than the last time you saw me," I said, pouring him a beer, "Guys must be on a run?" I asked.

Gemma nodded. I instantly relaxed knowing that Tig wouldn't surprise me and show up in the next hour, or day for that matter.

We sat around and talked for awhile and then Piney's phone rang. "I'll be there in a bit," he said, closing the phone and walking out the door.

"Hey," Gemma said, standing up, "What's wrong."

"Tiggy spilled his bike out on the highway," Piney said, looking at me.

I jumped up, "Is he okay? What happened? Is he at the hospital?" I paused and sat back down, rubbing my face. I really needed to get over him.

"Don't know," Piney said, walking out the door.

Tara gathered her things, "I gotta head back to the hospital… not really supposed to be here. See you later, Gracie."

Gemma followed her out, "I need to go get some things taken care of."

I stood there alone in the clubhouse, "Okay," I laughed to myself, "See you later."

I walked down the hallway into the room Tig had always occupied. It was dirty, his clothes were scattered in piles around the room. I wondered what the house looked like and maybe if both of us had been avoiding it. I was still at David's. We hadn't been fooling around, always using the excuse that my head hurt or, I didn't want to mess up my stitches. (of course, there were ways to get around that but, David never argued.) David was content with cuddling and just being together. I kept the house clean and cooked for him. In return he kept me safe. Jax wouldn't let me go out without someone. He was afraid that Clay would realize that I knew about the hit on Opie. I had been grounded by my best friend and he would have killed me if he knew I was alone at the clubhouse.

I sat on Tig's bed and fell backwards, letting his scent fly up around me. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and called Jax. "Hey," he answered.

"What's going on?" I said, sitting up.

"Tig got picked up by bounty hunters," Jax said, "Where are you?"

"I'm at the clubhouse," I said, "Where is he now? Are you safe? Are you going to get him?"

"We're fine," Jax said, "We'll all be back home soon. Have Tara come to the clubhouse, okay? He's going to need some mending."

Jax hung up. "I guess no one says good-bye around here," I said to myself.

I tried Tara's cell a few times but, no answer. "We'll have Doctor Knowles contact you as soon as possible," the hospital receptionist said.

I paced the clubhouse waiting for Tara's call. I pounced on my phone as it buzzed around on the table. "Bout time," I said, tapping my fingers on the bar.

"What's up?" Tara asked.

"Its Tig," I said, "He needs some medical attention."

"Is here there now," Tara said, I could hear her lowering her voice, "Where are you?"

"He's gonna be here soon," I said, glancing at the door, "I really don't wanna be here." The thought of seeing Tig made my stomach turn, "Sounds like he's gonna need stitches."

"I can't make it," Tara said, "I have surgeries back to back, all night. Can you do it?"

"I've done it before," I said, remembering the time Tig had come home from a night out with a huge gash on his arm.

"Good," Tara said, without asking me if I really wanted to (although, I'm sure she already knew the answer) "There's a first aid kit in the closet by the door, everything you need is in there, I gotta go."

Tara hung up the phone without saying goodbye. I set up a mini-emergency room around the leather couch that sat in the corner. Again, I paced the clubhouse, wringing my hands and worried about what I would say to Tig. Every time I heard a car drive past, I would run to the door. But, it was never them. Finally, three hours and a shot of tequila later, I heard the big truck pull into the lot. My heart started to race and I felt sick to my stomach. I took a deep breath and walked to the door.

"_What's she doing here?" Tig said, seeing Gracie in the doorway._

"_Waiting for you," Piney said, "You need my help?"_

"_Nah," Tig said, carefully getting out of the car, "I'm a big boy."_

I slowly walked towards Tig. Halfway to each other, Tig stopped and so did I. "Hey" I said, trying to smile. I knew that it looked like I was trying not to barf but, I was kind of doing that too.

Tig grunted, trying to walk again, "Give me a hand."

I shot over to to Tig's side and slipped an arm under his, "Where's Tara," he asked.

"At work," I said, setting tig down on the couch, "Just gonna do it myself," I walked over to the bar and pulled a bottle of tequila out and tossed it to Tig, "Its gonna be a party."

"Thanks," Tig said, taking a long swig.

I sat on my knees and stared at Tig's bandages for a moment, the blood had seeped through and was starting to turn brown. I looked up at him, "You're gonna have to take your pants off."

Tig laughed, "Only you and me could make this a pants off party."

"Yeah," I smiled, "Only you and me."

Tig undid his pants and slid them down as far as his arms would reach. I grabbed them and slid them off, over his boots. I scooted closer to Tig's leg and began to clean off the dirt and blood that had started to dry on his skin. Tig's leg tensed up when I ran the cloth over his leg. It could have been that he was sore, or it could have been that the clubhouse contained three percent air and ninety-seven percent sexual tension. I hadn't gotten any since I had been at David's and, I my head was spinning being around Tig. I would forget for five seconds about everything that happened and I would find my hands wandering up his leg. But, my mind snapped back to reality and I thought about my sister.

The cut was big and it wasn't going to be a quick fix. The silence was killing me. "How've you been?"I asked, putting in the first stitch.

Dead silence. I looked up at Tig, he was staring at me, "Jax and Piney told me that you've been staying with Hale."

"Yeah," I said, wishing I hadn't started a conversation.

"You fucking him?" Tig asked, never missing a beat.

I snorted, "Unfortunately, no," I pulled another stitch close, "A little bird told me that you've been fucking around yourself."

"Just a few blow jobs now and then," Tig took another swig of tequila, "good stress relievers."

I couldn't help but shake my head, "Only you," I said.

"Yeah," Tig said, leaning his head against the back of the couch. He closed his eyes and soon, fell asleep.

I finally finished up the stitches, not too bad for my second time around. I cleaned off his leg for the second time. I let my mind wander again and gently pressed my lips against Tig's leg, finally breaking the barrier. Tig stirred a little but, he didn't wake. I cleaned up around him as his snoring became louder and the bottle of tequila became dangerously close to falling. "Hey," I said, taking the bottle and brushing his hair back, "Let's get you to bed."

Tig grumbled as I slipped my arm underneath him and helped him up. I slowly helped and sore and tired Tig to his room. He limped to the bathroom as I pulled the covers back on his bed. He slowly washed his hands in the sink. I came up behind him and took off his cut, laying it on the dresser. I walked back to him as he hung his head and put his weight on his hands that were resting on the sides of the sink. I watched him for a split second and then, I took to strides to his back. I wrapped my arms around his stomach, resting my body against his. I laid my head against his back. He turned around, his head tilted back and his eyes still closed, like he was trying to ignore me. So many voices screamed at me in my head, _Don't touch him, anymore… He killed you sister, instead of killing your best friend. Go ahead… help him. Just take off his shirt… you're just helping him. You're next, _they screamed,_ you'll be next! _I closed my eyes, took a deep breath and started to unbutton Tig's shirt. I tried my best to keep my hands from shaking and to keep my fingers away from his skin. _Don't do it. _The voices said again, _you've missed him, you need him… do it. _They argued. I shook them away again. I needed to get out of here. I got halfway down his shirt when my hands did what my head or my heart, both were pretty fucked up at this point, were thinking. My hands stopped, I let my fingers slowly run up Tig's stomach, ran them to his chest. My left hand over a scar and my right over his heart, I felt it racing. I leaned into him, kissing the space between my hands, inhaling his scent. My mind continued to argue with itself but, my body was already doing its own thing. I continued to unbutton his shirt, still kissing him. I felt Tig's hands pull me close to him; they slipped down and began to undo my belt, my pants. I slipped my hands into his boxers, feeling for the thing I had missed so long, hot and hard. Tig groaned and pulled my face up to his, kissing it. He pressed his face against mine, hard, pulling me as close as he could against him. I ran my hands through his hair, down his neck, onto his shoulders. He pulled my face away from his and looked at me. I looked straight in his eyes and my breath caught in my throat. The sane voice in my head whispered once last time, _go. _

"I need to go," I said, the tears welling up in my eyes, "Now."

"Why?" Tig asked, catching my arm, pulling me back to him.

"Please," I said, my voice quivering, on the edge of another breakdown, "Let me. Let me go."

Tig opened his mouth to say something but, didn't. He gently let go of my arm. I looked at Tig, "I'm sorry," I said, quietly, "I'm sorry this happened but, I can't."

Tig grabbed me one more time, "I need you to stay," he said, "I'm going crazy… without you. I… please stay." Tig eyes bounced back and forth across my face, searching.

I'm sure my eyes were as big as dinner plates. Never, ever had Tig said anything remotely close to _that. _My mouth hung open; my ears couldn't believe what they had heard. Was it desperation? Was he begging? Did he just want a lay? I stuttered, blinking my eyes with my words, "I, I need to go."

I broke free of Tig's grip and ran out the door. A tug in my stomach made me want to go back, and hold him and cry. But, I couldn't. I made myself sick thinking about it. That I would even consider it. Tears streamed down my face. I couldn't get Tig's face out of my head. His eyes, they were sad and confused. I also saw Donna, I saw her face, cold and dead against the steering wheel. I ran out the door as Jax and the guys pulled into the lot. "Perfect," I said, wiping my face dry. Jax saw me and jumped off his bike.

"Hey," he said, his eyebrows pulled close together, "What's going on?"

"Nothing," I said, pushing Jax away, "Leave me alone."

"Stop," Jax said, walking behind me, "Gracie!" Jax yelled, making me stop.

I turned on my heel, "What do you want?"

"What's going on?" Jax said, stepping close to me.

I glanced over to the rest of the guys, all staring at us, "I can't be around here. I can't. Its tearing me in two. Its tearing my heart in two. I can't look him or anyone else in the eye without knowing…"

Jax pulled me close to him, muffling my voice. He whispered in my ear, "Don't," he said, "Don't do it. Let it go… let all of it go."

I pushed myself away from him, stepping back. I wiped my face dry and straightened my clothes. I smiled at Jax, knowing I wouldn't see him for a long time. "I can't," I said, getting rid of all emotion in my voice, "I can't be here, any longer. If you want to see me, come to my home," I turned around and walked away, pausing and turning to Jax one more time, "Don't wear your cut."


	7. Chapter 7

I had been home for a few days. I let my cell phone die and it had been sitting, lifeless on the counter. I cleaned the dusty, empty house for two days. I stopped to sleep and eat. I kept the radio on as high as it would go. I heard it at the end of my driveway when I took the third bag of trash out. Finally, a knock on my door, between songs, snapped me out of my cleaning frenzy. Weaving in and out of all the boxes, I walked to the door, slowly swinging it open. David.

"Hey," I said, opening the door letting David walk in.

"Hi," he said, turning to me as I closed the door, "What's up?" I put my best happy face on.

"Jax told me what happened," David said, putting his best man of the law face on.

"You two sure are getting close, aren't ya," I said, picking up a box. I walked over to the mantle on the fireplace and started tossing pictures that contained anything SAMCRO. The box filled up quickly and the mantle became quite bare. I tossed everything else into another box.

"You gotta talk to someone, Grace," David said.

My head snapped up when David called me "Grace"… I hated it. People only called me that when they were serious. Jax and Opie never called me that. Neither had Tig.

I finished taping the flaps of the box down and stood up to look at David. "About what?" I said, holding one of the boxes of memories.

"What's going on with you? What's going on in your head? You haven't talked to anyone in days." David stood staring at me from across the room.

"Oh," I said, getting out a cleaning spray and towels, I went to work on the fireplace, "Would you like to talk about how, my sister was murdered? Or, would you like to talk about how the man I loved killed her? Or, that he was supposed to kill my best friend instead? Or, that my parents blamed me for my sister's death and I haven't seen them since? Or, would you like to talk about how I can't just… get over it. I can't let it go. I'm leaving Charming."

David's mouth hung open, "Why?"

"I can't do it," I said, marking each of the boxes either "keep" or "storage" and set them in their designated piles, "I'm going to, well, I don't know where. I've rented a moving truck for two weeks. I'm going to drive until I find somewhere I like. But, right here, in this town… I can't do it."

David was looking at the floor, his hands on his hips. He moved his eyes up to me, "You know I love you?" Before I said anything, David continued, walking toward me, "And, you know I'll take care of you. I don't want you to leave. I don't want you to run away, I want you to stay… with me." David put his arms around me and pulled me close, "Please… stay with me."

"No," I said, pushing him away. I put my hands on the sides of his face, "Go… go home. Find yourself a housewife. One who isn't all messed up. Cause, I am. This town made me this way," David opened his mouth to say something, but I put my finger over it, "Please, the longer you stay, the harder it gets. You've got a football game on in twenty minutes."

David put his hands on my shoulders and gently kissed my head. He walked out the door, looking back in "I love you, Gracie," he said.

I smiled at him, "I love you, too."

The door shut gently behind him. I watched his old, ugly Jeep pull out of the driveway. I pressed play on the music and went back to work. An hour later, Gemma stormed through the door, slamming his hand on the pause button. "What the hell?" I yelled at him.

"What the hell," Gemma said, "What the hell? Where the fuck have you been? I have been trying to get a hold of you for days. Do you even know what's going on?" Gemma paused and looked around the room, "Where the fuck are you going?"

"I'm leaving Charming, moving away," I said, trying to sound as confident as I could in front of Gemma. David was a little easier to be cocky to than she was, "I don't care what's going on with SAMCRO anymore. I'm done with it."

Gemma laughed at me, "You really don't know then. They all got picked up the other night. Arrested."

I stared at Gemma, "Jax and Opie?" I asked.

"Not Opie," Gemma said, sitting down on the couch and rubbing her temples, "We need you right now. I need you right now."

I shook my head, "This town and this club have screwed my head up, Gemma. I can't."

Gemma stood up, "We need help with the money. Enough to bail them out… all of them. You'll get paid back."

I tossed my moving money back and forth in my head, Gemma stared at me. She knew, Gemma always knew. "I've got twenty-thousand in the bank," I said, quietly, ashamed that I hadn't offered it sooner, "and… ten thousand in the safe."

"Thanks, baby," Gemma said, standing up.

I gave her the money in the safe and saw her out the door. "I'll get you the money tonight," I said.

Gemma turned around and smiled at me, "Thanks," she smiled, "Lemme know if you need some more boxes."

I closed the door and walked back to the pile of keep boxes. I pulled the tape off of the top, opened it up and put its contents back where they were. "Looks like we're staying for awhile," I said, turning the music on again.

Dear Readers,

Thank you SO much for reading this far! Thank you for sticking with me. This story has really been sucking me in lately so; don't be surprised if chapters (even though, some are little) are popping up frequently. Only three more episodes left in Season 3! Can you believe it? What an awesome group of people this show has created!

Also, fellow Sons and Tiggy fans should head over to for some AWESOME SOA content and even cooler people!

I don't own anything Sons of Anarchy (just seasons 1 and 2 on DVD… which have been my life savers in this whole story writing process!) But, Kurt… if you feel like giving anything as a gift… you know where to tweet me!

New chapters on the way!

Reviews are like Tig… I love them!

Elizabeth Bruttenholm


	8. Chapter 8

_I watched the world float to the  
Dark side of the moon  
After all I knew it had to be something  
To do with you  
I really don't mind what happens now and then  
As long as you'll be my friend at the end_

If I go crazy then will you still  
Call me Superman  
If I'm alive and well, will you be  
There holding my hand  
I'll keep you by my side with  
My superhuman might  
Kryptonite

I slowly opened my eyes, "What the fuck? What is that sound?" I said out loud, to myself. My phone buzzed around the table next to my bed, a familiar name blinked across the screen. "Clay?" I said, picking up the phone off my nightstand. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock, "Its two in the morning… is everything okay?"

"No," Clay said, I had never heard his voice like that, "Tig… I need you to go get him. He's out on the reservation with the Prospect. They did… a little test for the club… shrooms." 

"What?" I said, sitting up in bed, "Is he okay? Why can't you go get him?"

"I need you to go get him," Clay said.

I remained silent for a moment, "I don't think… that's a good idea," I said.

"Gracie," Clay said, becoming the President of the Sons of Anarchy, "Go get him."

I knew I couldn't refuse, "Okay."

I dressed and got into my car and drove the forty-five minutes to the reservation. I sat in the car, hoping Tig would just get in. A young kid walked out to the car, "He's out in the field," the boy said, pointing out to a field with tall, yellow grass in it.

"Thanks," I said, closing the car door and starting the hunt.

I walked a hundred yards out into the grass, letting my hands brush across the tops of it. I heard something out in front of me, "Tig?" I said, craning my neck and walking faster, "Tig are you out here?"

I saw his head poking out above the grass. The closer I got I realized he was crying, sobbing, "I'm sorry… I'm so sorry," he kept saying over and over again.

"Tig," I said, and ran to his side, "Are you hurt? What's wrong?"

Tig slowly looked up at me, dropping the doll that was in his hand, "I'm sorry," he said. He grabbed my face in his hands, "I'm so sorry, Gracie," he cried, "I'm just so sorry."

I wiped his face, I didn't like tears on Tig. "What happened," I asked, "What's going on?"

He fell onto me, knocking my down into the cool grass. He put his head next to mine and touched my face. "I'm so sorry," he said, I didn't try to get up, I turned on my side to face him, "It wasn't supposed to be Donna," he said. My heart skipped a beat, _here it comes_. Tig put his hand on my face, "I killed Donna." He had stopped crying and but, it face still held the pain.

I felt the lump in my throat and the pit in my stomach. I hadn't cried in days. I rested my hand on top of Tig's and rubbed my thumb on his. It took me a few moments, "I know."

We stared at each other for a moment and then both of us let out sobs. We had been holding our breaths, waiting for the other one's reaction. Tig stared at me for a long time, finally, he spoke, "I need you so much… I'm going crazy without you. I need you with me. All the time."

"Let's go home," I said, sitting up. I pulled Tig up with me and he stood up, so close, that our bodies were against each other. I leaned up to kiss him but, his hand closed over my mouth.

"Wait," he said.

We walked to the car, in silence. Thinking about what had just happened and what was going to. "Are you okay to take the bike?" I asked, as Tig veered to the right, toward his ride.

"Meet me at the house," he said, starting his bike and riding off.

I followed Tig. I flipped through the different radio stations four times and found nothing that could calm me down. I wanted Tig so badly but, I felt like a pony with the carrot dangling in front of me. I settled with rolling down the windows and listening to Tig's bike.

Biting my nails as I pulled into the driveway. I parked next to Tig's bike, as soon as my feet hit the pavement, a wave of heat ran over my body. I knew Tig was in there and I knew that he was waiting. I opened the door and Tig jumped up off the couch. His cut was on the table, his wallet and phone sat on top of it.

I slammed the door close and turned around. Tig turned and walked toward the bedroom. I followed him, taking off my coat and tossing it across the room. Tig waited by the bedroom door, while I walked in. He let the door shut and we lept toward each other, slamming our bodies together. His mouth crushed onto mine. His hands worked at my shirt while I worked at his.

I tried to slip away from Tig to catch my breath but, he held me tighter. He pressed his mouth against mine, kissing me. He pulled away only for a second; I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck, "You smell like booze."

_Tig grabbed her face with his big hands and forced his mouth onto hers. Gracie moved her fingers over Tig's cut and he kissed her again._

_The tiny light on the bed table dimly lit the room making it hard to see, but Gracie still looked as beautiful as the last time. Her eyes lit up as he grabbed her around the waist and pulled her to him. His hand quickly moved up from her waist and ran through her thick, dark hair. The familiar smell of Gracie's strawberry shampoo clouded his senses as he put his lips up her ear._

"I need you, now," Tig pulled himself back and stared at me. His eyes darted down to my lips right before he pulled me onto him. I could taste the last shot of Tequila on his breath, found it soothing, and I let a moan escape from my mouth. Tig pushed me backwards until I was flat against the wall. His mouth never left mine.

_Her hands reached up to touch his face and she ran her hands through his curly hair. He grabbed them and pulled them above her head, pinning them against the wall behind her. Keeping her hands pinned up with one of his, Tig quickly pulled off his leather cut and dropped it to the tile floor. Gracie slipped her hands out from his grasp and ripped off Tig's dark blue, button-up shirt, snapping the buttons off as she went. The remains of his shirt slid to one side, revealing the dark hair that spread across his entire chest._

"God, how I have missed that," I moaned. Tig pushed me down so I was holding myself up with my arms on the bed. He slid his hard hands up my stomach, grabbing my shirt along with it. He slipped the thin shirt up over my head, revealing my tight, black tank top underneath. Tig quickly ripped off the tank top and threw it to the floor. He grabbed me again around the waist and pulled me up to him so that my chest met his hard mouth. I could feel the beginnings of a beard scrape against my bare skin and I threw her head back so it was nearly touching the bed.

_Tig slowly traced his tongue along her chest and up to her neck. His hand crept into her curly black hair and pulled so her smooth neck was completely exposed to him. With his other hand, he roughly ran it up and down her stomach, first caressing, and then scratching along her bare skin. His hand finally came to rest on her neck where a gasp came from Gracie's lips. Tig's teeth grazed her ear, then bit down more forcefully. _"You're mine."

_He pushed his lips against hers. His hand tightened on her neck for only a moment, just enough to force her head down onto the bed. His hand tugged at her hair, making her cry out in pain for a second and then the pain turned to pleasure as his hand left her hair and once again felt along her stomach. _

Tig got up and started to tear at my silver belt buckle. I tried to sit up and kiss him, but he pushed me back down and then started at my belt again. He quickly ripped it from the loops, making one break, and then threw it, hitting the wall making another dent in the drywall. Tig broke the button on my tight fitting jeans and pulled them down, showing the black thong underneath. I slapped my hands on the wall behind me, bracing myself for what I had needed for, far too long. Tig tightened his grip on my neck again.

"_Stand up," Gracie started to fumble to her feet, but not quickly enough. Tig grabbed her by the waist and pulled her up so she was facing him. She quickly started to undo the button on his jeans, feeling what was waiting for her underneath. Before she could go any further, Tig grabbed Gracie by the hair and brought his lips to hers. His hand slid up her stomach, cupped her breast, and squeezed. Gracie's breath came faster now as Tig ripped the bra off of her. He pushed her back against the wall and licked his way down her chest, stopping occasionally to bite and suck._

"Stop wasting time, Tigger," Tig looked up and met my eyes. He smiled and his blue eyes narrowed. He pulled my black underwear down and stood back up. He grabbed my arms and pinned them against the wall behind me. With one hand he finished with his zipper and rubbed himself against me. I could barely contain myself any longer, I needed him. Now.

_Gracie's breath was coming in short gasps now and she tried to pull her arms down from Tig's grip. She could feel him rub faster against her. The hair on his chest was rubbing against her bare skin, scratching her. Tig grabbed her leg and pulled it up so it hooked around his waist. His lips were now on her breasts and she began to moan, Tig pushed his mouth over hers, muffling the sounds that came from Gracie's mouth with his. He grabbed her other leg and picked it up, wrapping it around his waist. At the same time, she could feel him enter her. Tig covered her mouth with his as she started to moan, taking her noise into him. He pushed in and out of her, scraping her back against the wall, but she wouldn't feel the pain until later; now it was just her and Tig._

Tig picked me up and carried me back to the bed, never leaving me. I accidently kicked out my leg and knocked over the new lamp beside the bed. I reached up and pulled his hair so he would look back at me. He looked at me as my nails dug into his back and pulled down, leaving red streaks behind. Tig's breath was coming quicker now as he pushed in and out of me. I felt his lips constantly on my body, my neck, my chest, and my lips. I slammed my hands behind me, gripping the head of the bed. My back arched as Tig pushed. Tig grabbed my back and pulled me up to him so we were now sitting together. I looked down at his eyes and ran my hands through his hair. Tig's breath was coming even faster now and he pushed even faster and harder. I rocked my hips to match his thrusts, Tig grunted as I let out a moan with each push.

_He ran his tongue along her neck as she moves her hips against him. Her long hair falls into his face, filling his senses again with her smell of strawberries._

"_Gracie…Gracie," his breath was even shorter now. Her breath was hot in his ear. Tig could feel her hips move against his as he pushed deeper into her. Gracie started moaning and Tig couldn't take it anymore. He threw his head back as Gracie let out a final moan. Her lips ran along his exposed neck as he exhaled. She moved her hips against his one final time._

Tig and I sat together for a moment. He rested his head against my chest, still breathing hard. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close to him. I pulled his head tighter against my body.

"I'm back, Tig."

I woke up with my head resting on Tig's chest. He was snoring quietly. It was still dark out and the room was cold. I sat up in bed and looked around the room. The lamp was still laying on the floor but, Tig must have turned it off. The covers slipped off my skin, exposing it to the cool air, making goosebumps crawl across my skin. My gaze fell on Tig, his head had fallen to the side and his mouth hung open a bit. I didn't know what the morning would bring. I couldn't even imagine what tomorrow would bring, let alone waking up. For now, I was cold and I slid under the covers, scooched as close to Tig as I could get, burying my face in his chest. His arms slowly wrapped themselves around me. And, I fell asleep.


	9. Chapter 9

"Gracie," Tig said, running his finger from my hairline to my nose, "You want breakfast?"

I opened my eyes and it took me a moment to realize what had happened, "Sure," I said, sitting up, holding the sheets against me. Tig's hand ran up and down my back. We sat in silence for a moment, Tig's hand caressing my back. I looked around the room and laughed, I hadn't noticed the destruction that we had caused last night. Pictures from the wall were lying on the floor and if we hadn't knocked them down, they hung crooked. The lamp was still on the floor, along with the alarm clock. Our clothes lay scattered around the floor, Tig's boxers hanging from the doorknob.

I turned around to look at him. His eyes were closed but, a grin was spread across his face. "I'll go get breakfast started," I said, sliding my legs out of bed. I winced, I was sore, "Let's use some lube next time," I said, looking back at Tig.

Tig leaned over and pulled me back into the bed, sliding on top of me. Morning wood. Always got the best of me, probably always would, "How about, this time," Tig said, kissing my neck and collarbone.

I didn't refuse.

I woke back up, this time alone. I could smell the coffee in the kitchen. It took me awhile to realize that Tig was arguing with someone. I rolled out of bed and threw on the silk robe that hung on the back of the door. I poked my head around the corner and saw Tig, standing in the doorway wearing his boxers and t-shirt. The voice was muffled and I couldn't see who it was. Tig was standing in a rather territorial stance but, the cup of coffee in one hand and the egg covered spatula in the other made him seem… less menacing.

"You should go," Tig said, jerking his chin up.

"I just wanted to check on her," the voice said.

I came up behind Tig, rested my hand on his back. My face flushed red when I saw David standing in the door. "Oh…" I said, running my fingers through my frizzy hair and pulling the robe a little tighter, "David… what, what are you doing here?"

_David looked at Gracie, he saw her sleepy eyes, her frizzy hair and her pink cheeks. He knew that look. He looked at her, trying to figure out what to do but, he saw that he had lost her to Trager for good. _

"I saw the bike in the driveway and wanted to make sure everything was okay," David said, kicking his toe against the stairs on the house.

"We're fine," I said, scooting behind Tig. I felt how tense the muscles in his back were and I ran my finger up and down the back of his neck, instantly feeling him relax, "Everything's fine."

David looked up at me, one last time, "When he cheats on you again," he said, squinting his eyes from the sun, "Call me."

I felt Tig tense up again and grab the back of his shirt, "Thanks, David," I said, reaching around Tig with my free hand and pushed the door shut.

"Mother fucker," Tig said, turning around took look at me.

I was tired of this. I walked to the kitchen and flopped into a chair at the table. I rested my head in my hands. Tig poured me a cup of coffee and slid it between my elbows so the steam floated up into my face. I leaned back and rubbed my forehead, "When is gonna be normal? Like it was," I said, staring at Tig, "When it was you and me… and, we didn't have anything to worry about."

"Never," Tig said, sitting down next to me, "It will never be the same."

I felt my shoulders sag; I figured that was the answer, "Will I always have to worry?"

"About," Tig said, taking a long drink of coffee. I never could figure out how to drink hot coffee like he did.

"You," I said, "I don't always want to worry about who you're with when you're gone or on the road. It kills me."

Tig took a deep breath and rubbed the space between his eyebrows, "Gracie," he began, "I need you to know that… that," Tig was having trouble with the three words I so desperately needed him to say. He rubbed his eyes again and looked at me.

I reached over and gave his hand a squeeze, "It's okay," I said, "Don't… don't force it," I walked over to Tig and sat on his lap, staring at him, "I just need to know that when you come home… when you come home that you're coming home to me because you love me. And, that those girls at the club or on the road are just… pussy. Nothing more. I can't stop you from being with them and I won't try. Just… I need you. I love you."

The tears were pouring out of my eyes at this point, Tig was wiping them off as they fell, missing some that landed in dark spots on his shirt. Tig started to say something when his phone buzzed around on the table next to us. "Yeah." He answered it.

I rested my head on his shoulder, ignoring the muffled voices on the phone, "Okay," Tig said, flipping the phone shut.

"Church," I asked, wiping my eyes.

"Yeah," he said, standing up, forcing me to stand up with him. I let my arm fall to his waist, not wanting to let go, "Pack your bag. You're coming with."

I stared at him, "Something wrong?"

"Clay told me to bring you," Tig said, walking into the bedroom to finish getting dressed.

I followed Tig wishing that I was on the bike with him. We pulled into the garage parking lot. Everyone was there. Tig took my bag as we walked into the clubhouse. The guys were already sitting in the church room. Jax looked up at me and, when I saw his face… I knew immediately something was wrong. Tig walked into the room and shut the doors behind him.

I took my bag and went into Tig's room. I couldn't sit there and wait. I started to gather up his clothes and took them to the old washer and dryer down the hall. It took the guys three loads of laundry to finally finish church. I heard the doors open and the men filing out. I walked into the bar and was terrified when I saw the looks on everyone's faces. Tig came up behind me, "Go to the garage," he said, "We need to talk."

I stared at Tig and then looked over at Jax, who nodded and then took a shot of tequila that Chibs had handed him. Tig took my hand and led me to the garage, shutting the door behind us. "What's going on?" I asked, leaning against one of the workbenches.

Tig didn't say anything but, pulled me close to him, holding me tight, "I won't ever let anything happen to you."

I pushed Tig's face away from me, "What's going on?"

"Remember," Tig began, resting his hands on the top of my thighs, "When Gem had that accident?"

"Yeah," I said, realizing I hadn't seen Gem in a few days, "Is something wrong?"

Tig continued, I had never seen him like this, "It wasn't an accident… she was," Tig paused again, shaking his head, "She was raped."

I stared at Tig. My mouth opened and closed. So many things, so many, made sense. The fight with her and Clay, the hospital trips, the bruises. Jax walked into the garage. I flew off the work bench and pulled Jax close to me, "I'm… I'm so sorry," I said, holding him close.

Jax held me tight, "Don't go anywhere without Tig."

Jax let go and walked out the door and rode off in his bike. Tig walked up behind me and draped his arms around my shoulders; I held onto his wrists and kissed both of his hands. Tig kissed my ear. "What's going on?" I said, looking out into Charming from the garage, "What are we doing?"

"Living," Tig said, "Trying to anyway."

I just stood there, looking out at the town that I had grown up in. How it changed. How I had changed. We all had and, it wasn't for the better.

The rest of the day, we all quietly made our way around the clubhouse. Jax and Clay making necessary phone calls, Tig carrying out Clays' orders. I stayed close to Tig when I could. When I couldn't, I was behind the bar, making drinks for the guys. No one really felt like eating but, I made some sandwiches and we all ate in silence. As the sun started to set, the clubhouse started to fill up with girls and friends of the club. Tig finally got back and as soon as he walked in the door, a swarm of women attacked him. I bit my lip and folded my arms, staring from behind the bar. "Hey," Opie said, leaning against the bar and looking in Tig's direction, "If they look you in the eye they'll turn into stone."

"Damn," I said, pouring Opie a shot and one for me, "I know I shouldn't get mad… we talked about this just, this morning."

Opie threw the shot back and shook his head at me, "Do you realize who you're with?" he chuckled.

"Yeah," I said, finding something to do around the bar, unfortunately it was lighting a cigarette and making myself a margarita, "If he keeps this shit up," I said, pointing the bottle of tequila at him, "I'm gonna have no liver and black lungs by midnight."

Opie laughed and I slid a beer his direction, "Don't wait for your pumpkin, Cinderella," he said, taking a drink and walking away.

The mood started to lighten up when everyone got a few drinks in their systems. Lyla showed up later and we talked for a bit. I liked Lyla. She may have had her head on a little crooked but, I'd straighten her out. And, she made my Ope happy. "You two get back together?" Lyla asked, helping me with the constant order of drinks.

"Yeah," I said, passing out bottles of beer, "Why?"

"I can tell," Lyla said, "You keep looking at him _that way… _and your face gets red when you see all those girls."

I looked up and saw one of the smuttiest Crow Eaters run her hands over Tig's crotch, "Bitch," I said, leaning back against the back of the bar, "It's just pussy. She means nothing," I said, telling Lyla and reassuring myself.

"Go," Lyla said, pushing me around the bar, "Show them that he's yours."

"No," I said, walking back behind the bar, "He knows."

Lyla pushed me back out, "But, they don't." Lyla pointed over to Tig and the slut grinding on top of him.

I looked at Lyla and she winked at me. I felt a naughty grin spread across my face. I slipped the button up shirt that I had on, off and threw it on the floor. The black, lacy tank top underneath was most fitting for the situation. The red bra underneath was perfect. Lyla laughed at me, drawing attention from the guys at the bar. I undid my hair and let it bounce past my shoulders. I looked over at Jax and Opie who were sitting in front of me. "Looks like Cinderella made it to the ball," Opie said, to Jax.

I took one more shot of tequila and started my mission. I wasn't sure what I was going to do when I made it to Tig but, we'd work something out. I passed through the crowd with ease. The music was blaring and the room parted like the Red Sea. Tig saw me over the girls shoulder. He quickly pushed her off of him and walked up to me. "Cute friend," I said, coming up to him.

"I know some better ones," Tig said, adjusting his pants.

The whole room was staring now. "Excuse me," the girl said, stepping between Tig and I, "I think I was here first."

I rolled my eyes and stared at Tig, who put his hands up and backed away. "I think I've had him way before you," I said, trying to walk around her. She stepped in my way.

"Go back to David's," the girl said.

I felt the room tighten and heard Chibs, "Get 'er, Gracie," he said.

I didn't need a second opinion; I punched her square in the face. _Motherfucker. _Tig made it look so easy but, fuck, it hurt like hell. The bitch hit the floor though and the crowd erupted in cheers and yells. I turned to look around and Jax and Opie were laughing, holding each other up on the bar. Lyla was smiling and Chibs was on his way over, "Thatsa girl," he said, kissing me on the cheek.

My eyes were watering and my hand was throbbing. I turned around to face Tig. He was laughing and shaking his head while Clay pat him on the back, "Go get her," I heard him say.

I walked up to Tig and jumped, wrapping his arms around my butt, he held me against him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him, hard. The room erupted into cheers again, "Take me to the bedroom," I said, laughing.

Tig carried me to the bedroom, the guys slapping his back the entire way. I could already feel his pants bulging, it would have to wait. Tig set me down and shut the door, "Motherfucking… fuck!" I said, holding my hand that was slowly turning blue, "Why? Why the fuck does it hurt so much?"

"Shit," Tig said, walking over and grabbing my hand.

"Don't touch it," I squealed, "Why would you touch it?"

"I'm sorry," Tig said, holding out his hand, "Lemme see it."

I gently set my hand in his and Tig inspected it, "I don't think its broken," he said, kissing it, "It just needs someone to show it how to hit."

"Hey," I said, "You better watch it or you'll be next," I pulled Tig into me and he held me for a moment.

"Sorry about that," he said.

I believed him, wholeheartedly.

"Oh, Tig," I said, breathlessly as I came, "Fuck… Tig," I didn't know how he did it but… he did. Every time.

Tig threw his head back and growled on top of me as he did the same. He rolled over and we lay there, breathing. I rolled over on my side and propped myself up with my elbow, resting my wounded hand on Tig's belly, "Should we go rejoin the party?"

Tig opened his eyes, "Nah," he said, closing his eyes, "I wanna stay right here."


	10. Chapter 10

I woke up sprawled out on the bed, alone. Tig had gone off with Clay earlier that morning, leaving me alone at the clubhouse. I stared at my hand which had turned a nice shade of purple and was a size bigger than last night. It was sore but, worth it. I threw on some fresh clothes that I had brought and went out to the garage. Chibs was sitting there alone, staring at some papers in his hands, "Hey good lookin," I said, walking over to him. He quickly threw folded the papers and threw them inside his vest.

"Hey darlin'," he said, standing up and pulling me close, "How's the hand?"

"It's okay, looks worse than it really is," I heard him sniff and looked up at him, "Feeling okay," I asked, feeling his forehead, "You look a little pale."

"I'm okay," he said, "You eat?"

"Not yet," I said, "Not much around here except hamburger buns and beer."

"C'mon," Chibs said, tossing me a helmet, "Let's get some breakfast."

"Can you ride," I asked, touching the back of his head.

"I can always ride," Chibs said, "Can you hang on?"

"Always," I said.

I hadn't been on a bike in a long time. I hadn't expected that it would be Chibs toting me around town. We parked and walked into the old diner in the middle of Charming. The waitress obviously knew Chibs, I watched her pull down her shirt and push up her boobs as she walked over. Our breakfasts came out quickly, "Okay, Chibs," I said, buttering my toast, "What's going on? I can tell…"

"Just shit, darlin'," he said, shoving a forkful of pancake into his mouth, "Just shit."

"Fine," I said, flicking an egg in his direction, "Be that way."

"Hey missy," he said, pointing his fork at me, "Watch yourself."

We talked about the party last night for a little bit when Chibs paused and was staring at me, "What?" I asked, wiping the corners of my mouth.

"You know," Chibs smiled, "I remember when you were yay high running around the garage with Jackie-boy and Opie. Now look at you, all grown up, Tig's old lady and Gemma's right hand."

I smiled at Chibs, "Things don't always work out the way you expect them."

"Yeah," Chibs said leaning forward and squeezing my hand, "They do, kid. They do."

We spent the rest of the day riding around town, stopping by my house to get some more clothes, stocking up on cigarettes at the gas station. We rode back into the garage parking lot a few hours after lunch. Tig came running out the followed by Jax and Opie, "Where the fuck have you been," Tig yelled, stomping up to me, "I've been trying to call you all day." He put his hands on my face, turning it , from side to side, inspecting me for damage. Opie and Jax came on either side of Tig, both looked at me with furrowed eyebrows.

"She was with me, boys," Chibs said, patting Opie on the shoulder and walked toward the garage, running a hand through his hair.

Jax pointed a finger at me, "Don't ever do that again," he said, turning around walking back to the clubhouse.

Opie followed him without a word. "You can't just leave baby," Tig said, grabbing my hand and walking toward the clubhouse, "I don't care who you go with," he said, "As long as I know… Charming isn't safe anymore."

"I'm sorry," I said, walking into the clubhouse. Tara was with Jax and Lyla was with Opie. Clay seemed lost in thought, he rested his hands on the bar, he looked empty without Gemma next to him. Tara was holding Abel, who I immediately went over and took from her, "He's gotten so big," I said, holding him, he smiled and wrapped his fingers in my hair. I walked back over to Tig and stood by him, holding Abel.

All the guys seemed to focus their attention on Clay, who was staring at the floor, deep in thought, "What's the plan, Clay," Tig asked.

"Lock down," Clay said, "Everyone is going to come here. Unser, Nomads… anyone connected. Anyone that could get hurt because of us. I don't care how old or how young."

Tig's arm found its way around me and pulled me close to him. I worried about David, being caught in the middle of all of this. Clay's speech continued, "Second, we need to bring in all personal stocks of guns," he said, "Keep a couple for protection but, we're gonna need the rest," Clay paused and his shoulders sagged, "Get to work."

The guys dispersed in silence, I followed Tig to his room, "What can I do?" I asked, leaning against the door, watching Tig pull guns from places around the room.

"Go with the girls," Tig said, pulling a rather menacing gun out of the top of his closet, "Help her," Tig's face was focused and stern, he never took his eyes off the guns he was handling.

I nodded, grabbed my purse and turned to walk out the door. "Gracie," Tig said, still looking at his gun, "Come here."

I walked over to Tig, he set the gun down and looked at me, "Be careful," he said, resting his hands on my hips, "Let me know, wherever you go and whoever you're with."

"I will," I said, kissing him, "Don't worry, sergeant."

Tara, Lyla and I went to the store, followed by Piney and Half-Sack, and started to get the long list of things the clubhouse was going to need, mostly toilet paper and liquor. It was dark when we got back to the clubhouse, Tara's and my car were stocked to the brim. The guys were all in the garage, inspecting the pile of guns they had on the floor. Lyla walked towards the guys but, I caught her arm and swung the door closed, "That's not us," I said, walking back to the bar and putting away the numerous bottles of booze, "We wait for them."

I realized, as I put things away, that I was turning into Gemma more and more every day. The way I talked to the Crow Eaters, the guys. I knew the rules and ropes. I had been totally submerged in club since Donna's death. I hadn't realized it until now but, it connected me to a club in such a way that, I could never go back. I could never leave. I hadn't realized how much I needed Tig. He could never tell me that he loved me and I would be okay. I knew.

I ordered a few pizzas for dinner for everyone. Piney and Half-Sack met the delivery kid at the entrance to the parking lot. Poor kid was probably terrified. I think the guys in the garage smelled the food and came out to eat. Jax stood next to me, holding Abel. I handed him a plate of pizza, "Those all the guns we have?" I asked. Lyla heard me and stared, thinking I was breaking the rules.

"From here," Jax said, "Everyone is getting their stuff from home tomorrow… you got anything?"

"No," I said, taking a bite out of a slice of pepperoni, "Only the one Tig gave me."

"You're in the right place, Gracie," Jax said, smiling, "It might not seem like it but, you are."

"I know," I said, staring at Tig.

Everyone went their separate ways after they had finished eating. Tig and I stayed at the clubhouse again. It had been a few weeks since we had gotten back together. I crawled into bed with Tig. I rested my head on his shoulder and looked up at him. He was tired, already half asleep, "What are you thinking about?" he said, turning his head so his lips rested on my forehead.

I smiled, "You."

Tig grinned, "What a coincidence," he said, "I'm thinking about me, too."

"You would," I said, slapping him with the back of my hand, "Fuck…" I said, "That wasn't a bright idea," I held my hand that was now throbbing.

"If you weren't so violent your hand would feel better," Tig said, laughing.

We fell asleep that night, making fun of each other like we used too. It felt good to be happy, it made me forget about everything.


	11. Chapter 11

Tig was gone by the time I got around the next morning. He went to Clay and Gemma's to pick up guns. Lyla and I were at the clubhouse together, watching the kids. Piney and Bobby stayed with us to make sure we were safe, although I doubted anyone would try and attack SAMCRO on our own turf. Slowly, the guys returned. Chibs and Half Sack first, then Clay, Tig, Jax, Opie and Juice. We all had things to do and no one was in the mood to party.

The guys were outside, working on things in the garage. Jax and I were talking to Clay, getting things ready. In the middle of our conversation, Juice ran in, "Jax," he said, "Clay, c'mon."

We all ran outside and looked around. "Shit," Jax said, and ran toward the corner of the lot.

_Tig saw Gracie run out of the clubhouse and stop in the middle of the doorway, her hair flying forward around her face when she stopped. _No,_ Tig thought, _Not Gracie, don't let her see this. _But, it was too late, Tig looked back up at Opie trying to prepare his body for the next hit. Tig thought he was going to die, that Opie would surely kill him._

Opie held Tig up against the tow truck, holding him by his hair. Tig's face was bloody and he wasn't fighting, his arms hung limp. He looked up at Opie, whose fist was pulled back near his ear, ready for the next blow. I followed Jax who had pulled Opie away. Tig looked around, blinking slowly.

"What did you do," Clay yelled at Tig.

"I had to," Tig said, shaking his head, "I had to tell him. I killed Donna, man."

My eyes got big as I looked from Bobby to Jax to Juice to Clay. Opie turned and walked away, followed by Piney. The rest of the guys walked inside, shaking their heads, trying to comprehend what had just happened. "Call Tara," Jax told Juice.

I slid Tig's arm over my shoulders and helped him inside. Clay walked into the garage and slammed the door behind him, we heard him throwing tools around, and a stool hit the door with a bang.

I sat Tig down on the bed and walked back out without saying a word. Jax was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. The rest of the guys watched me with disbelief as I walked into the garage with Clay. He was leaning against the workbench, his head hung low. "Hey," I said quietly.

_Clay was surprised to see Gracie. She looked at him, her big eyes pitied him. He could barely look at her, now that she knew. He looked everywhere, at the ceiling, the floor, and the walls. Finally, he looked at her._

Clay looked up at me and any bit of anger I saw, disappeared and I only saw sadness, "Gracie," he said, walking towards me, "I am so-,"

"Stop," I said, shaking my head, "I don't need any more apologies," I saw Clay's hands , they were red and starting to swell. I walked over to him and picked them up. They dwarfed my hands. I rubbed his palm, "I've known."

"What?" Clay asked, wrapping his big hand around mine.

"About Donna," I said, looking at the floor, "Since that fight Tig and I got into… I've known."

My shoulders sagged and I felt a weight lift off my chest. Hot tears spilled out of my eyes, "I realize why it had to be done, what you ordered. I understand now and I forgive you."

Clay pulled me close to him, "Thank you," he said.

"I'll talk to Opie," I said, pulling away and wiping my face, "I have to take care of Tig right now. Its time to fix this club."

"Go," Clay said, opening the door for me, "He needs you."

I walked into Tig's room and Tara was cleaning him up. He cracked a smile when I walked in, "Hey," he said quietly.

"I talked to Clay," I told him.

"What," Tig asked, standing up and walking towards me, "What did you say?"

"I told him," I said, "I told him that I knew what he did. I had to." Tig shook his head and went into the bathroom, I followed him. I heard Half Sack ask Tara to look at his implant and I shut the bathroom door behind Tig and I, "Hey," I said, putting my hand on his back, "Look at me," Tig turned around and stared at me, his eyes were glassy and his cheek was turning purple from the big gash on his face.

"I'm sorry," Tig said, brushing his hand through his hair.

"I know," I said, I rested my hands on his shoulders, "But, when shit happens, no matter how fucked up it is or we get, we, you and I, this club, needs to move on. I did it. There are bigger things on the table right now," I couldn't believe I was saying this, "We've got people to protect and a big list of things to do. Get patched up and get back out there."

I opened the door and waited for Tig to walk out; he kissed my head and whispered, "I love you."

I stared at Tig in disbelief. I had just convinced myself the day before that I would never need Tig to say that to me but, I thought my chest would explode. Immediately after he said that, he turned around and threw up. Romantic.

Half Sack headed to the hospital after we told him that his implant was too infected. I wiped Tig's mouth off, "Thanks," I said, laughing, "But, if I'd know that expressing your feelings made you sick, I'd have told you not to."

"Sorry," he said, looking down at me and laughing.

My phone buzzed in my pocket, "Its Opie," I said, flipping it open, "Hey," I said.

"Hi," Opie replied, he sounded distant.

"Can we talk," I asked.

"I'm on my way back to the clubhouse," he said, "Meet me in my dorm," and he hung up.

Tig waited in silence until I finished. I told him that Opie was on his way back, "I'm going to talk to him," I said, "He needs to hear it from me."

"And, me," Jax said, coming into the room, "We need to talk to him together."

Tig stayed in his room while Jax and I waited in Opie's. Opie charged into his room making us both jump. We all stood there for a second, staring at each other. Opie sat down on the bed between us, "What am I supposed to do," Opie asked, staring at his hands that were in his lap.

"Stay," Jax and I said in unison.

"And, Tig? Clay? How am I supposed to share a patch with them," Opie said, sliding his hat off and running his hands through his hair, "Am I just supposed to get over it?"

Jax said nothing.

I took a deep breath, here goes nothing, "Yes," Tig and Opie looked at me, "You need to stay." Opie scoffed at me and shook his head, but I continued, "We need to make this club right, you, me and Jax can do that," silence followed so, I went on, "I'm staying and so should you. Your kids need you. Your dad needs you and we need you."

"How long have you known," Opie said, looking at me and Jax.

"Since the beginning," Jax said, staring at the ground.

Opie looked at me and I found myself looking at the floor, too, "Since Tig and I got in that fight."

We all sat in silence, Opie's anger for us not telling and our guilt filled the room, "We need to move on," I said, standing up. I walked toward the door and opened it, I turned around and stared at Opie, "There are bigger things going on and people need us. It's up to you whether you want to make it right or not."

I walked out, leaving Jax and Opie to talk by themselves. I walked back into Tig's room. He was eating a bowl of chili. I took one whiff and I had to run to the bathroom to throw up, "What is wrong with us? We must be getting sick."

"Nothing," Tig said, throwing the chili away, "Chili makes you throw up and swollen testicles make me throw up."

I lay down on the bed and realized how tired I was. I crawled under the covers and closed my eyes. I felt Tig sit next to me. I looked up at him and smiled, I smelled the chili from the trash can and had to jump out of bed and throw up again, "Tig," I said, leaning over the toilet, "Can you get that chili out of here?"

Tig laughed and took the trash can out of the room. I hobbled over to the bed and crawled back in. I turned over onto my stomach and buried my face in the pillow. Too much puke in one day. "You finished," Tig asked, I didn't look up, I just grunted into the pillow.

Tig sat down beside me again ad rubbed my back, "Maybe you should take it easy the rest of the day," he said, leaning down and kissing the back of my neck, sending chills down my back, "Turn over so I can kiss you."

"Fuck no," I said into the pillow, "I just barfed twice."

Tig laughed and rolled over onto the other side of the bed, "Gracie," he said, sliding his hand up my shirt, "Turn over…"

I turned my head to look at him, "I have puke breath," I whined and threw my face back in the pillow.

"Yeah," Tig said, "You do."

I fell asleep next to Tig, worried that so much stress had finally made me sick. Tig pulled me close to him and buried his head in my neck, tickling my skin with his facial hair. He felt me scoot away and nuzzled in closer, I whined again, "Tig, stop… I don't feel good!"

"I'm sorry," he said, pulling away.

"Don't go too far," I said quietly, peaking up from the pillow. I figured Tig could handle a little puke breath so I turned over and curled up next to him. He was snoring before I was.


	12. Chapter 12

I woke up and blinked, it was still light out. I was afraid I'd slept the whole day. I opened the phone and realized that I had. Damn. I opened it again and double checked the date, October 3, 2010. My heart skipped a beat. I jumped out of bed and ran out into the bar and pulled the calendar off of the wall, "What's the date today?" I said, kind of screeching.

"The third," Bobby said, looking at me over his glasses.

Everyone was staring at me, I saw myself in the mirror across the room. Sheer terror was plastered across my face. "Tig," I said, staring at the calendar, "Did you use a condom that night we got back together?" Juice laughed at my bluntness but, then realized what was happening, "Oh…" he said.

All the faces turned towards Tig, who was holding an ice pack to his face… which had turned white. His eyes got big. Everyone turned back towards me. I grabbed my purse off the counter, threw on somebody's shoes and made for the door, "I gotta go to the store," I said.

I heard Tig say, "Holy shit," as I ran out the door.

Chibs followed me. I ran into the store and grabbed a basket and filled it with pregnancy tests. The teenage clerk at the checkout grinned. I tossed a fifty at the kid and ran out into my car. Chibs had a hard time keeping up. I ran into the clubhouse with the grocery bag full of tests. No one had moved. Tig stood up and started to say something but, I cut him off, "Don't! Say a word," I said, tossing my hand in the air, "Tara," I yelled, "I need you RIGHT NOW."

I stared at the fiftieth pregnancy test. "Fuck you," I said to the smiley face on the end of the stick, "Gimme another one, Tara," I threw the test into the trash but, it bounced out from being so full of the other smiley faces, positive symbols and colored lines.

"There are no more," she said, quietly.

"Are you sure they were all… positive," I asked, knowing that they all were.

"Yeah," Tara said, a slow smile spread across her face, "I'm sure."

I walked out of the bathroom, followed by Tara. Gemma ran in the door, the biggest smile on her face, "Are you," she said.

I stared at her and then looked at Tara who nodded. I had never seen Gemma smile like that before. She started to say something but, Tara shook her head and widened her eyes. I slowly walked past Gemma and out into the bar. The guys hadn't moved but, there were more of them. Men from different charters were starting to come in. Everyone was gathered around Tig, who was sitting in the chair with his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands. Chibs hit Tig in the side when he saw me walk out. Tig stood up so quickly, he wobbled a little. Everyone stared at me. I looked around. The air was so thick. I think everyone was leaning forward, waiting for me to say something. I looked right into Tig's eyes and tried my best to smile but, I thought I was going to puke again, "I'm pregnant."

For ten seconds, the room was dead silent. Everyone had turned to Tig. We all waited, I was terrified. Tig looked down at the ground and then up at me. The biggest smile spread across his face, bigger than Gemma's, and he threw his arms in the air, his hands in fists, "FUCK YEAH!" Tig yelled, striking a triumphant pose.

The guys jumped on him, hugging him and high fiving him. I stood there. My hands on my stomach which now held a human. I let out a huge breath of air and started to laugh. Gemma came up to me and hugged me, "I am so happy for you," she said.

Tig pushed his way through the crowd and gently pushed Gemma out of the way. Tig picked me up with arm and hugged Gemma with the other, "Congrats," Gemma laughed.

Tig paraded me around the room, sitting on his shoulder. He set me down in the middle of it. I was passed around the group like a rag doll, I started to relax, the initial shock of it had gone away but, I couldn't wrap my head around it. Everyone settled down, Tig kept me close to him, making me sit on his lap. He wrapped his arms around me, resting his hands on my stomach. Tara came over and leaned down to my ear, "Can I talk to you for a second?" she said and walked over and stood next to Gemma.

I patted Tig's hand, "I'll be okay," I said, standing up and walking towards Tara. It took me awhile to get to her, everyone kept stopping and congratulating me. Finally, I made it, "What's up?" I said, looking back at Tig, who was talking to Clay. They both had shit eating grins on their faces, Clay patted Tig's shoulder. Tig laughed and then looked over at me. The look I saw on his face instantly put me at ease. I smiled back and he winked at me.

Tara snapped me back to reality, "How far along," she asked.

I thought back and did the math, "Month and half… maybe two. I don't really know. The last time I had my… my period, it was just spotting."

"Makes sense," Tara said, "We should get you in for some ultrasounds though."

I thought about it all for a second, "Oh no," I said, looking at Tara, "I've been smoking and drinking and Tig and I… we had sex. Rough sex."

Gemma laughed, "I think it's early enough that you'll be okay."

I looked at Tara for reassurance, "She's right, you and the baby should be okay."

It started to get late and everyone went to dorm rooms or the air mattresses that had been set up, up and down the hallway. Tig and I walked to his room. We walked in and I flopped down on the bed, "I can't believe it," I said, resting my hands on my belly, "We're gonna have a baby."

Tig stared at me and smiled, "Yep," he said, he undressed and crawled on top of me.

"Tig," I said, gently holding his bruised face, "We can't."

"Who said I was," he laughed, he kissed my forehead, my nose and my lips, "I love you so much," he said, crawling down and resting his head on my stomach.

"I thought you were going to be angry," I said quietly, looking down at Tig.

He looked back up at me, "What?"

I felt stupid for thinking it, let alone saying it, "I thought you would be mad that I got pregnant… I thought you wouldn't want the baby."

Tig stared at me for what seemed like forever, "Gracie," he said, "Don't ever say anything remotely close to that again."

I closed my eyes and I ran my fingers through his hair. We fell asleep like that, Tig's hands were stretched up and holding my arms, his head resting over our baby and my hands wrapped in his hair, "I love you two," I whispered, half asleep.


	13. Chapter 13

I lay down on the crinkly paper and lifted my shirt, exposing my belly to the cold hospital room air. Gemma was still smiling, staring at me. And Tara squirted the cold jelly across my stomach.

Half Sack was waiting outside. Tig had forced him to go after Clay had elected some guy called Kozik to follow us. I thought Tig was going to kill Clay or the blonde guy that had a grin on his face.

Gemma craned her neck over to the screen, "You tell Opie yet?" Gemma asked, not looking at me.

"No," I said, leaning toward the screen too, "He'll find out soon enough."

Tara pointed at the screen, "Right there," she said, her finger resting over a little spot.

"That's it?" I asked, staring at her.

"Yep," she said, "And, you're about two months along."

I cleaned up and we headed back to the clubhouse. Tara honked the horn and a couple of guys, both holding guns, swung the gate open. The place was full to the brim, men, women and kids filled the parking lot, spewing out from the clubhouse. Gemma led the way as we walked into the bar and Tara and I followed her. Clay walked to the front of the room, Jax stood on his right side and Tig on his left. Gemma took her spot next to Clay, on Jax's side. Tara and I found our respective men. We looked a lot like royalty. We were. We looked out over the crowd. I saw Opie in the back, next to Lyla and the kids. I smiled at him and nodded. He nodded back. I walked up to Tig and kissed him, "It's official," I said, smiling.

Jax gave Tig the signal and Tig pulled his fingers to his lips, letting out a loud, clear whistle, "Everybody, listen up," he yelled. Tig pulled me close to him, putting his hands on my belly. He was going to be very touchy for the next seven months. I wrapped my fingers in between Tig's.

Tig looked at Clay and everyone followed his gaze. Clay looked out over the crowd and began, "I'd like to welcome you all to club reaper, glad you made your reservations in advance. As you can see, we're booked to capacity," everyone laughed but, quieted down as Clay continued, "You're here because SAMCRO takes care of its own," I felt Tig's hands pull me closer to him, "the next few days this club has got some business to handle that could put the people in this club and the people connected to it in some… unfriendly situations. Chances are, nothing is going to happen but, people have already been hurt on my watch," Clay looked at Gemma, to Chibs, to Opie and then me, "and that ain't ever gonna happen again," Clay changed his tone from family meeting to President of Sons of Anarchy, "Nobody gets in without an escort and nobody leaves without one. You got safety concern, you talk to Piney. You got a comfort concern, you talk to my Queen. Under this roof you'll all be safe. I want you to make yourself at home. I love each and every one of ya."

"Alright," Tig said, clapping his hands.

The guys made for the church room, I followed Tig to the door and pulled Opie's hand toward me, "You're doing the right thing," I said, kissing him on the cheek.

"You pregnant," he asked bluntly, looking over at Tig.

"Yeah," I said, realizing what this meant to Opie. Me, carrying the child of Tig, the man who killed his wife.

"Congrats," Opie said, walking past me and into the church room.

I stood there, ready to cry. Things may have been happy and normal for awhile but, like Tig had told me, they would never be the same. Gemma saw and waved for me to come over. "You tell him," she asked, sitting on one of the bar stools.

"Yeah," I said, "He hates me. I know it."

"He'll get over it," Gemma said, "If he is gonna stay, he'll get over it."

I knew she was right. If Opie had chosen to stay with the club, he'd have to accept that Tig and I were having a baby. Gemma rubbed my back, comforting me. Tara joined us and we had a cup of coffee together. "Its good you found out when you did," Gemma said, "Took our minds off a lot of shit."

"Glad I could help," I grinned, "I still can't believe it."

We heard the doors open and the guys walked out. Tara, Gemma and I went to join them but, Gemma stopped us. Tig and the blonde guy that was going to go with us to the hospital were having a little standoff. I walked closer, "You wanna kiss?" I heard Tig say, the blonde walked away and Tig turned to Clay, "I am not okay with this."

"I couldn't tell," Clay said, and walked over to Gemma and I. Tig followed him.

"How's the bun," Tig said, smiling.

"Baking," I said, rolling my eyes, "And, don't call it a bun… it sounds likes we're gonna eat it."

"Gonna eat you," Tig grinned.

Clay and Gemma laughed and I punched Tig in the arm, "Ow," he said, laughing.

"I might be preggers," I smiled, "But, I'll still beat the shit outta you… and now, I can blame it on the hormones."

Clay laughed and pulled Tig and I close, "I don't know what we would do without you two," he said, "But, this kid is going to be a terrorist."

"We know," Tig and I said in unison, "We know."

"You must've really pissed someone off," Gemma said.

We were all watching Tara change Chucky's bandages. Everyone was craning their neck. Tig and I sat up on the bar and were joking around, "Do you think they're trying to get a look at his stumps or, trying to get a look at the only compulsive masturbator in the northern hemisphere?" Tig asked.

"Second choice," I said, staring at his injured hands.

Chucky looked up at us, "I accept that."

I stood next to Tig, he was sitting on his bike and I stood between his legs, "Where are you going?" I asked, knowing what was going to happen.

"Timberland," Tig said, resting his hands on the back of my legs.

Clay walked over to his bike and Tig stood up and kissed me, "I gotta go," he said.

My breath caught in my throat, "Come back in one piece."

"Always do," he said.

I walked away and stood next to Chucky. We watched as our men, fathers and our brothers drove off. "He'll be okay," Chucky said to me, "Tig always takes care of his own and himself."

I looked at Chucky, remembering that Tig was the one who had brought Chucky back from the Chinese. "Hey Stumpy, Gracie," Gemma said, "Come inside."

I followed Chucky and patted him on his back. "You're a good guy," I said.

I took one last look out and watched the two guys shut the gates. My hands touched my stomach, "He'll be back," I said, thinking I was crazy talking to someone who didn't even have ears yet.

_Tig thought about Gracie and the baby all the way to the timberland. He had to come back. He wasn't going to leave Gracie alone with a baby. Especially with _that _baby. Tig heard Gracie's voice in his head, _"You got stuff to do, Tig… get a hold of yourself and do it." _The corner of Tig's mouth twitched a little. He had a Gemma Junior, which, wasn't a bad thing. Tig thought about his other kids, his girls. Dawn and Fawn. He felt bad, he'd really fucked up with those two. He wouldn't do that again. "What are you grinning about," Clay yelled, from his bike._

_Tig snapped back to the road and looked over at Clay, "Gonna be a dad."_

_Clay smiled a little and shook his head, only Tig would be thinking about that at a time like now. _

_Unser sat in his office and Hale walked in. "She's pregnant," David asked, slamming the door behind him._

"_Yeah," Unser said, looking around the room. David was looking at Unser like he had knocked her up._

"_Is it his," David yelled, pacing around the room._

"_Yeah," Unser said._

"_Fuck," David said, punching a clean whole through the wall, "Just… fuck. Now what am I supposed to do?"_

"_Deal with it," Unser said plainly._

"_I can't just let her get stuck," David said, sitting on Unser's couch, "Wayne, she probably thinks that she can't leave now that she has a baby."_

"_She looked pretty happy to me," Unser said._

_David shook his head. There was no way he was going to let Gracie do this alone, he thought for sure Trager was gonna leave her as soon as he realized what he was getting into. _

I waited out in the clubhouse, almost everyone else and gone to sleep or was out in the parking lot. I started to clean, trying to take my mind off of everything. I looked at the clock, it was four in the morning. Gemma slowly walked out, her face was sleepy, "Baby," she said, "You gotta get some sleep. They'll be back."

I nodded and Gemma tucked me into bed, making me feel helpless. I fell asleep as soon as my head hit the pillow.


	14. Chapter 14

I handed out another plate of pancakes to whoever would take it. Feeding this amount of people was hard work. I wiped the sweat off of my brow and poured some more batter onto the griddle. Tig sat in front of me, eating his biscuits and gravy. His face was more bruised than before. I leaned on the bar and looked at him, "Ya know, your face isn't gonna be as pretty if you keep bustin' it up," I said, running a finger down the less bruised side.

"That's what we've got you for," Jax said, pulling up a chair next to Tig, "We get uglier, you get prettier."

"How many pancakes do you want, suck up," I said, tossing Jax a paper plate and a fork.

Everyone kept their tone low but, the fellowship and camaraderie could be heard in the muffled laughs and seen in the smiles on the faces. "Tig, Jackson," Clay yelled across the room, "Let's go."

Jax scooped the last bit of pancake into his mouth and took off, Tig leaned across the bar and we kissed, "Be careful," I said. I really sick of saying that.

I spent the rest of the day with Lyla, cleaning the clubhouse. It had grown messy and stuffy from all the people. We sent most everyone out in the parking lot for fresh air and some sunshine. Tig wouldn't let me go with Gemma and Tara. He didn't want me to get hurt in "my condition". I made him promise that it was just the circumstances and that he wouldn't keep me locked up for the next seven months.

Gemma and Tara had taken Abel and Kenny and Ellie weren't really into playing games so, I dug out some old Cosmos from under Tig's bed that I had stashed there. I curled up in a chair, Lyla sat on the couch across from me with a pile of her own magazines. We swapped facts from each for hours, laughing at the ridiculous ones. She asked me questions about the club and Opie. She genuinely cared about him and the kids, and I she was my friend because of that.

Tig and the guys were in and out all day, none of them staying long. Tara and Gemma had been gone for a long time now. "Has anyone heard from either of them," I asked Lyla and Piney.

They both shook their heads. We decided not to worry, Half Sack was with them. They were probably just busy. A few hours passed and I began to fret. It was dark when the sound of motorcycles made us run out into the parking lot. I counted them, two short. Tig walked up to me, "You okay," he asked quietly.

I looked at everyone and then back at Tig, "What happened?"

Tig looked around and then pulled me inside, "We need to talk."

I looked back to see who was here, Bobby was hugging Clay, Chibs was shaking his head and Juice was talking to Piney. Opie was off in the corner, hugging Kenny and Ellie.

Tig sat me down on the couch in the bar, "I don't even know where to start."

"Just start," I said, taking his hand.

Tig rubbed his eyes, "Gemma, shot Zobelle's daughter," he said.

"Where is Gemma," I asked.

"Stahl reported that Gemma killed Zobelle's daughter and Edmond Hayes."

"Holy shit… so, where is she?" I asked, wringing my hands together.

"With Unser," Tig said, "She's safe."

"And, Jax," I asked, looking at the guys who had walked in the door, "He must be with Tara and the baby," I saw another missing; "Half Sack must be with them."

Tig looked up at Clay, "Where are they?" I asked again.

_Tig couldn't tell her. He couldn't stand to see her like that, not again. He pushed her hair behind her ear, "Half sack," Tig said, pausing and looking at her again. He contemplated saying that the Prospect had gone on vacation, "He's dead." Tig pulled Gracie close to him as soon as she sucked in her breath. He hated when she did that, that short breath before she cried. She took a deep breath and put her head against his neck, "I'm sorry," she said. _

_Tig put his hand against Gracie's neck, holding her against him. She pulled away and wiped her face. She asked another question, looking around the room, "Where's Jackson," she asked._

One more, _Tig thought, _one more answer.


	15. Chapter 15

I threw another load of laundry into the washer and poured the detergent. I stared at the water as it flowed into the pile of dark colored clothes; my eyes went in and out of focus as I blinked. I was tired, it was four o'clock in the morning and I couldn't sleep. I kept the clubhouse phone and my prepaid next to me, hoping that Tig would call. He was with Gemma, keeping her safe. I missed him so much. He sent me texts everyone few hours, telling me he was okay but, I really just wanted to hear his voice. I was dreading today, which was Half Sack's funeral. I didn't want to go. But, I knew that by noon the garage and clubhouse would be full, just like Donna's funeral. I changed my clothes and hopped in the bed. I ran my fingers through my hair, making it frizzy.

I hated being alone. I could hear Chibs snoring out in the bar. I walked out with a blanket and pillow. Bobby, Juice, Happy and Chibs all were sleeping on the couches; Juice had a pillow on the pool table and was sleeping soundly. I pulled in cigar out of Bobby's hand and set it in the ashtray. A beer bottle tipped precariously in Chibs' hand, I put that on the table, next to Bobby's cigar. Happy had his feet propped up on the coffee table and his head was leaning against the cushions on the back. He woke up when I threw the pillow and blanket next to him. "Can I sleep out here," I asked, "I don't wanna be alone."

"Sure, kid," Happy said, he put my pillow up against his leg and patted it.

I crawled on the couch and curled up next to Happy. The cool leather squeaked against my skin. Happy rested his arm on my shoulder. It wasn't Tig but, it would do.

…

I twisted my hair into a long, loose braid. It was thicker than my wrist. I contemplated giving myself a haircut but, realized that it wouldn't end well. The last time that happened, I ended up with one side six inches shorter than the other. I slipped on my black dress and slid my feet into the black heels to match. The funeral didn't start for another three hours but, there were already a lot of people heading to the funeral home. Lyla picked me up and we all went together. I hesitated to get out of the car, "I hate funerals," I said, dreading what was about to come, "I just don't want to go to anymore."

Lyla brushed a wild curl back and kissed my cheek, "It'll be okay."

I hated being without Tig, I'd gotten used to staying by his side and I felt unprotected without him. This was the one thing I needed him most at. I needed his big hand on my back, his body at my side. We had to walk a little bit to get to the funeral home. Bikes lined the street and sidewalk but, we navigated easily through them. Clay was standing closest to the door and he scooped me into a warm hug, "Have you talked to Tig lately?" I asked, keeping my hands on the sides of his arms.

"Yeah, this morning," Clay said, "He's fine."

Clay gave me a reassuring smile and nod and I went about the group, hugging and consoling. I stuck close to Chibs, who had been close to the Prospect but, was just as uncomfortable as I was. The building was packed full of people and was too hot. After a few hours, it began to cool down and everyone made their way outside. Unser and David were out on the street, leaning against their cop cars. Police officers lined the streets. Too many of us in one spot. Everyone was gathered in small groups around the lawn, talking and generally keeping quiet. Every so often, someone would see a friend they hadn't seen in awhile and call out their name. As the sun set, a few people here and there were making their way to the clubhouse, most of us staying behind though.

Chibs and I were talking when we heard someone yell. We both looked out to the street where we saw a van pulling up, parallel to the sidewalk. The door slid open and a man hung out the side. Panic spread through the yard before he started shooting. People hit the ground or ran into the building. Chibs pushed me and I went sailing through the air but, something sharp hit my shoulder, knocking me backwards midflight. I hit the ground with a thud while another shock it my stomach and another hit my hip, throwing me across the lawn like a ragdoll. I screamed for someone and felt warm blood pouring out of my body. I tried to get up but, I could barely hold myself up. The van was gone and I saw Jax jump on the man behind a car. I saw Chibs look at me and the color ran out of his face. He screamed for Jax although, I couldn't hear him over my own heartbeat, pounding in my ear. Opie slid in the dirt next to me and picked me up, resting my on his leg. Jax fell down next to me and Tara pushed her way through. All of the sudden I could hear everything. Someone was making a horrible sound, something between a moan and a scream. A low, guttural, pain stricken groan. Jax was yelling at Unser to get an ambulance and Opie was still holding me, rocking me slightly. I don't think he realized it but, with every movement pain shot through my body. I tried to say something but, my mouth was filled with a warm, coppery taste. Blood. My eye lids slid shut, like I hadn't slept in days. I shot them open again but, the fell just as quickly. I could hear the ambulance and heard someone call them over. I tried again to open my eyes but this time, they stayed shut, keeping me in darkness and screams.


	16. Chapter 16

_Z"Was he pissed," Gemma asked, pouring a cup of coffee._

"_Gemma he had other things on his mind, bad night," Tig said, staring and the napkin covering the doll. He had been doing okay, not thinking about Gracie._

"_Shit… what," Gemma asked, setting down the hot coffee._

"_Drive by, Sack's wake," Tig said, rubbing his finger on the table, along the grain of the wood._

"_Jesus Christ," Gemma said, her heartbeat quickened._

"_We're whole," Tig said, focusing on the table, "Kid got shot… and, Hale. Dead," Tig paused, the sick feeling in his stomach came back, his chest tightening, "and, Gracie… she's alive but, she was shot. Three times." Tig rubbed his eyes, hoping to wake up from this shitty dream._

"_Holy shit," Gemma said, she sat down next to Tig, "Is she okay?"_

"_Yeah," Tig said, he chewed on his bottom lip, "all three bullets went through, clean."_

"_And the baby," Gemma asked. Tig looked up at her and she saw a look in his eyes, "Oh no… Tig baby, I am so sorry…"_

"_She lost it," Tig said, standing up and walking out, slamming the door behind him. He walked out into the backyard and ran his hands through his hair. Gemma was watching him through the window. Tig walked over to the three generic deer statues and kicked the smallest one, sending it into the side of the house. He walked over to a bench, surrounded by flowers that Rose had planted and held his head in his hands._

"I'm going to clean up your stitches," the nurse said, pushing the cart of cotton swabs and antibiotics up next to the bed.

I kept staring out the window, ignoring the world around me. I blinked slowly, my eyelids burned down and back up my eyes. An hour ago, Unser had come to visit me. It had been two days since the attack and no one had bothered to tell me about David, except Unser.

"I'm sorry, Gracie," he had said, "I had to tell ya… he would have wanted it that way."

I hadn't talked to anyone since. I needed to Tig, only Tig, and he was the only one I couldn't be with. I didn't know if he even knew about me. Or the baby. The doctors told me that it was unlikely that I would be able to have another baby. The second bullet had ripped through my body, so close to my uterus that the future scar tissue would make things complicated. As if they weren't now.

_Tig hugged Clay, "She's okay, brother," Clay said in Tig's ear. _

_Tig nodded, he knew she wasn't. Tig knew she was sitting in hospital room, by herself staring out the window. He knew she was in pain and he wanted to be with her. As soon as he got back to Charming, he'd be headed straight to Saint Thomas. _

Another day passed without word from anyone. I didn't know if Tig was okay or where Abel was. I was sore but, made myself walk. The nurses got pissed off but, I needed to get the fuck out of there as soon as possible. After a lunch of jello and grapes, I propped myself up and tried all the phone numbers I could think of. After no avail, I turned on the television again and engrossed myself in Wheel of Fortune.

After four hours of game shows, I slowly got out of bed and pulled the IV along with me to the window. It was overcast and drizzle fell from the sky, making everything wet and slippery. It had been over a week since I'd seen Tig. The weather and the situation made me wonder if I ever would. _Gotta get over this, _I thought, _Make it through, go back to your family. They need you._

I made my way back to bed. Not much to do but sleep and think.

_The guys followed the ambulance to Saint Thomas. Tig was already going there but, he didn't want to go for this reason. The guys followed Clay and Jax while Tig split off, searching for Gracie. _

I was sitting up in bed, watching another hour of Wheel of Fortune and sipping apple juice. I itched the spot on my hand where the IV had been. They'd taken me off the good pain killers and were filling me up with ibuprofen tablets.

My eyes wandered to the window next to the door, which was conveniently placed for me to spy on the nurses' station. My heart skipped a beat when I saw a Sons of Anarchy cut with a curly head attached to it. Tig turned around and looked at me. In less than ten seconds, Tig was in the room. "Oh baby," he said, and he sat on the bed and looked at me.

I sat up, and raised the uninjured arm and pulled him closer, "I'm so sorry," I said.

Tig's hands engulfed my face, his mouth crushed mine. Tears fell out of my eyes, wetting both of our faces. "Slow down, Tig," I said, pushing him away and leaning back against the pillow, "Its gonna be awhile before we can get goin' again."

"Yeah," Tig said, holding my hand, "I'm okay with that."

"Tig," I said, holding his hands on my lap, "The baby…"

"I know," he said, his face somber, "I know."

The nurse walked in with her cart, "Time to clean up, again," she smiled, "Could you please give us a few moments, sir?" she asked.

"He can stay," I said, squeezing his hand, "He can stay."

The nurse looked at us both and nodded.

_Tig stepped back as the nurse untied Gracie's hospital gown and Gracie slipped it off her shoulders. He forehead creased, he balled his fists and his temper flared when Tig saw Gracie's healing wounds. The doctors had stitched up the holes but, the huge black bruises that covered her shoulder, stomach and upper half of her leg made him sick. He looked out the window into the dark, he looked down at the bikes, illuminated by the tall street lamps. He could feel his temperature rising every time Gracie winced when the nurse touched her. _

The nurse finished and helped me into a fresh gown. She silently left and closed the door gently behind her. "Gracie," Tig said, sitting on the bed again, "I am so sorry."

"I'm okay," I said, running a finger down the vein that was popping out of his neck, "You're okay."

"Gemma's here," Tig blurted out.

"Tell her to come in," I said, peeking through the window, expecting to see her waiting.

"No," Tig said, "She's here… her heart went ape shit and she's in the hospital. They've got her in custody here."

"Fuck," I said, leaning against the pillow and closing my eyes, "She's okay, I though?"

"Yeah," Tig said, "she found out about Abel."

We sat for a few moments in silence, my hand rested in his, "I wanna go see her," I said, sitting up and slowly swinging my legs to the side of the bed, I pointed to the back of the door, "hand me that robe, would ya?"

"You should stay in bed," Tig said, not moving.

"Hand me the robe," I said, standing up slowly.

_Tig watched as Gracie pushed herself up off the bed. Her gown fell apart, exposing her backside. At least one thing hadn't been injured. Tig felt a pull in his groin that was meant for the woman in front of him. _

"_Fine," she said, snapping Tig out of his trance._

I shuffled over to the robe and slowly and painfully, put it on, "Let's go," I said, opening the door. Tig took my other hand and I used him as a human cane, we walked silently through the halls. We walked by the little chapel and I heard a familiar group of voices, which immediately made me swerve, slowly, into the little church, "Hey boys," I said, shuffling my slippered feet inside.

"Well, look what we have here," Clay said, walking up to me.

"Be careful with her," Tig said. Most of the guys just kissed my head but, Piney, Opie and Jax all pulled me close to them. I was already feeling better. Seeing them gave me even more of an incentive to get out of Saint Thomas. Tig stayed close to me, his fingers touching mine but, just barely. I wobbled a little, still unsteady. I slid into one of the pews and closed my eyes for a second.

I could feel everyone staring. I smiled, "Wanna see it then?" Without an answer I pulled the sleeve off of my shoulder, exposing the black bruise that surrounded five stitches. It ran from the round of my shoulder, down my back to my shoulder blade and back up to my collarbone before making an uneven circle back to the top of my shoulder again.

"Oh thatsa nice one, kid," Chibs said, looking all around it.

The guys took turns inspecting my wound closely. Tig finally pulled the sleeve back up, "That's enough."

We all talked for a bit, everyone caught me up on Abel and Cameron Hayes and Gemma. "Can I go see her?"

"Of course," Tig said, "Can you walk?"

"I'm fine," I said, as sixteen hands reached out to help me. I started to walk but, stumbled when the holes in my hip and stomach sent pain through my body, "fuck it all…"

"Don't move," Opie said, walking out into the hall. He came back a few moments later pushing a wheel chair.

I rolled my eyes, "I don't need that."

"Sit," Tig said, pointing to the seat, "Down."

I glared at Tig before I slowly sat down in the wheelchair. Tig carefully wheeled my out, "I'll be home soon, boys," I smiled, before the chapel doors swung closed.

Tig wheeled me down the hallway a little further and stopped in front of two cops, stationed around a door. They patted Tig down but, deemed me harmless. They opened the door and Gemma's head snapped up from the magazine in her lap, "Gracie," she said, sitting up and taking her reading glasses off, "Come here," she said, patting the bed and scooting over. Gemma held my hands, "How are you baby," she asked.

"I'm okay," I smiled, "You?"

"Been better," Gemma said, her voice weary.

Tig sat behind me behind, I could feel his warm breath on the back of my neck and found it comforting. The door opened and Chibs stuck his head on, "Tig," he said, "Gotta go."

Tig kissed the back of my neck, "I love you," he said, "I'll be back soon."

I grabbed onto Tig's hand before got too far, and kissed it, "Hurry."

I watched Tig walk out the door and then turned to Gemma. I felt my bottom lip quiver and a sob fell from my mouth. "Come here, sweetheart," Gemma said, pulling me into her. I curled up on the bed as Gemma held me, "You'll heal, Gracie," she said, kissing my head, "We all will." I wiped my face, feeling silly for worrying about me. Abel was gone, Sack dead… I really had nothing to complain about. I was alive. Gemma continued, "Tig was so worried about you… and the baby." The thought of the lost baby brought another round of sobbing and Gemma held me tighter. "You gotta try and let that baby go," she said, her voice quivering, "It's not easy… it won't ever be but, you gotta try." I let me eyes close and rested my head on Gemma's shoulder.

"_Sleep baby," Gemma whispered, laying her own head back and closing her eyes. _


	17. Chapter 17

A prequel! Woo! I don't own anything SOA… I do have seasons one and two on DVD but, that's it… Enjoy!

I was sitting up on the roof of the garage, looking out, over Charming. The sky was turning dark as the sun set, making the highway in between the hills glow. I had gotten in a fight with my sister for spending too much time at the Clubhouse… again.

We lived together now, on our own. Opie was a usual guest at our place. I didn't mind but, Donna and he made me sick when they got going. She was working for my parents, which pleased them to no abound. I couldn't imagine being with them for nine to five. I had nothing better to do, so I worked in the office and Clay paid me. It was good money, too. I spent most of my time there, at the clubhouse and I was getting pretty close to all of the guys.

Not sweet butt close but, I was learning the ropes.

I was working on some paperwork in the office one day when Tig brought in some more for me to process. "Thank you so, so much," I said, sarcastically. I stood up and pulled a Coke out of the little fridge in the corner.

"You are so, so welcome," Tig said.

"Oh wait," I walked over and pulled some papers out of a folder, "Here's some more… got a busy day ahead of you."

"Good," Tig said, walking out into the garage, he turned around in the doorway, "You look cute today, Gracie."

"Thank you, Tig," I smiled, blushing.

"Absolutely," Tig winked and my face got even redder.

David left a few days later. I thought I'd be okay without him but, I was wrong. I was crying a lot, of course. I hated crying. But, since David left, I was doing it a lot. After a couple of days off, I went back into the garage to work. Tig's, Chibs, Piney and Juice's bikes were in the lot. The big doors were all open, letting in the morning sunshine. I pulled in, parking next to the bikes. I moped around in the car, gathering my phone and purse. Usually, I would have primped a little before going to work with the guys but, today a SAMCRO t-shirt and blue jeans with my hair, frizzy as hell, sat on top of my head in a messy pile.

I shuffled into the office, shaking my head at the pile of papers that had accumulated on the desk while I was gone. It was almost level with the computer. "Lovely," I said to myself. I walked out into the garage, "Morning boys," I said, looking at the small table on the wall that held two coffee pots, both of which were empty, Clay had finally sprung to get new coffee makers after the ones from the Stone Age started making black goop instead of java. The stainless steel monsters sat empty, the shiny buttons were arranged around the little computer screen that was grey and blank, "No coffee yet?"

"Well," Chibs smiled over his sunglasses, "We're not really sure how to work those."

I pressed a button that looked like one that would turn it on but, nothing happened. I tried all of the other buttons with no avail. After a few minutes of hitting every combination we could think of, Tig, Piney, Juice, Chibs and I all stood around staring at the coffee machines with the instruction manual, "Where's American?" Juice said.

"I have no idea," I said, flipping through the pages, "Where'd Clay find these?"

We spent the next twenty minutes moving the pots at different angles, holding buttons down and cussing at each other. Clay walked in, "What are you goons doing?"

"You're Czechoslovakian coffee makers don't work," Piney said, laughing.

"That's because," Clay said, reaching behind the table, pulling up to electric cords with prongs on the end and waving them at us, "You gotta plug em in, my valedictorians."

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," I said, tossing the instruction manuals in the trash.

The coffee makers proved to be very easy to use after they were plugged in. Bobby showed up with a big bag of fresh muffins and the guys disappeared into the clubhouse. I gathered up the piles of today's work and set them on the different workbenches. By now, I knew where each guy liked to work and how he liked to do it. Chibs hated doing oil changes. Juice hated doing tires. Tig just liked to weld and burn shit.

I sorted out the last of the pile between Tig and Chibs, when Tig walked up behind me, "Muffin?" he said, handing me a banana nut pastry.

"Thanks," I said, "Here ya go, have fun." I turned around and walked away.

"Hey, Gracie," Tig said, with a mouthful of muffin, "You doing okay? Ya know, since David left?"

I smiled at Tig, not expecting that from him, "I guess so," I said, kicking the floor with my toe, "Just kinda bummed out, I guess. Thanks for asking."

"Yep," Tig said, taking another bite of muffin.

I walked back into the office but, before closing the door, I turned around and glanced back at Tig who was flipping through the papers I had left him. He munched on the muffin as I stared at him. He was wearing his dark blue shirt that all the ladies loved, his hair was curled up against his head and his face was freshly shaven. He looked over my way and I quickly turned away and shut the door. I grinned, and felt that feeling that you get when you realize that you really like someone.

Over the next few weeks, whenever I'd get down about David not being around, I'd peak through the blinds in the office, out at the garage and check out Tig. It was getting bad… I felt a bit like a stalker. I'd giggle hysterically, blush uncontrollably and stutter wildly. Every time I looked at him I grinned, I felt like I was in high school again. I was sitting in the office one day; I finished my work after the quiet afternoon and was just lounging around at this point. Tig and the rest of the guys were cleaning up. I was sitting on one of the stools, spinning and goofing around with them. I pulled my cell phone out of my pocket and dialed David's number before it was too late in the day. "Hello," a girl's voice answered the phone.

"Uh… Hi?" I said, stopping the spinning stool, "Who is this? Where's David?"

"This is Candy, his girlfriend," the girl said.

"Where is David?" I asked, staring at Jax.

"He's right here," Candy said, "Who is this?"

"No one," I said, everyone in the garage was looking at me and I flipped the phone shut ending the call.

"Who was that?" Jax asked.

I felt my bottom lip quivering and hot tears well up in my eyes. I stomped into the office and slammed the door behind me. I sat in the chair by the little fridge and cried. My phone buzzed in my hand and David's name blinked on the screen. "Yeah," I said, sniffing.

"Gracie," David said, "I am so sorry… I meant to tell you."

"Too late," I said, "I'll talk to you when you get back. I hate talking on the phone," I hung up the phone before David could say anything, "and, I hate you."

Jax poked his head in the door, "You okay?" he asked.

"That was David," I said wiping the tears off of my face, "and, his girlfriend."

"You're kidding," Jax said, walking into the office.

"No," I said.

"What the hell," Jax said, squishing his lips together. He hit the wall next to me and I jumped. I realized that Jax wasn't just reacting to David but, Tara left about the same time as David did but, on less that happy terms.

"Stop it," I said, "Go finish up out there. I'll be okay."

In truth, I wouldn't be. As soon as Jax shut the office door, I started crying again. David and I had an agreement. If we started to miss each other enough to wander, we'd make trips to Charming or San Diego. It had only been three weeks, was he that desperate or had he found someone better? All the what-ifs ran through my head and made me even more upset. "Gracie?" Jax said through the door.

"Yeah," I said, sniffling and wiping my face again.

"We're heading out," Jax said.

"I'll be okay," I said, gathering up my things, "I'll be right behind you."

"See you later, Gracie," Jax said.

I waited for the bikes to fade away before I stepped out into the garage. I jumped when I saw Tig leaning against the big garage door. "Hey," he said, jerking his chin up, "How you doin?"

"I'm okay," I said, turning off lights and locking the office door.

"No you're not," Tig said, "Let's go out."

"I'd rather not," I said, pressing the buttons that lowered the garage doors. I scooted out before they closed, "I'm just going to go home, watch Dirty Dancing, eat chocolate and wallow in self pity."

"Absolutely not," Tig said, "Let's go get some dinner."

"No, Tig," I said, walking to my car. The doors locked to my car as I dug for the keys. I turned around a looks at Tig, who had my car keys, jingling them back and forth.

"You can have them back… after dinner," Tig said.

I wasn't going to win this battle, so I didn't even begin to fight, "You're a mean man," I said, slapping his arm and sitting behind him on the bike.

"I know," he smiled, "the chicks dig it."

Tig and I shared a late dinner at the old diner in town. Tig pushed his mouth of food to his cheek and pointed his fork at me,

"You want me to kill him?" he asked, plain as day. My eyes got big and I looked around the diner, "Just say the word, Gracie. I'll do it."

"I know you will," I said, taking a drink of milkshake.

"He deserves it," Tig said. He was always so nonchalant when it came to that stuff.

"He deserves a curb stomp and a sharp knife," I joked.

Tig stared at me, "I can do that." The look on Tig's face made me realize he wasn't joking, "I'm serious baby, I'll do it. You say the word and I'll do it. He is nothing but a sack of-,"

"Tig stop," I said, feeling like crying again, "Someday… I'll get him back someday. That's a promise."

"I don't doubt it," Tig said, shoving another forkful in.

We rode out of the diner and sped toward the garage. "My road's coming up, Tig, just take me home," I said. Tig silently obliged and turned down my street, "Right here," I said, pointing to the little house that my sister and I rented. Tig walked me to the door and stood behind me as I pulled the house keys out of my purse. When the door unlocked, I turned to Tig, "Thanks," I smiled, putting my hand on his cheek, "I'm glad you kidnapped me."

"Anytime," Tig said.

"Can you give me a ride in the morning?" I asked, letting my hand fall to my side.

"Be here at eight?" he asked, "Go get some breakfast?"

"See you here," I smiled. I leaned up and kissed Tig on the cheek, "Thank you," I whispered in his ear. Tig kissed my forehead before turning around and walking back to his bike. I slipped inside; shut the door, leaning up against it. I smiled but, it fell as soon as I remembered what had happened. I went to bed and let my pillow soak up the tears before falling asleep.

_Tig lay in bed, looking up at the ceiling. He cocked his jaw from side to side, planning out what he was going to do to Hale. These past few weeks, he'd really "fallen in love" with Gracie… c'mon, not literally. The way you fall in love with hamsters and puppies and goldfish. She was so cute. He loved it when he caught her staring at him. _

Tig picked me up in the morning and we headed back to the same diner. "What'll it be," the waitress asked while eyeing Tig.

"Pancakes," we both said, at the same time, "the Platter."

"You eat the platter?" Tig said, "That's like, ten pancakes."

I laughed and took a swig of orange juice, cringing when it hit the toothpaste taste in my mouth, "I love pancakes."


	18. Chapter 18

Tig and I had been hanging out a lot since David's phone call. Fall was approaching and David would be home on break soon. I had a big family dinner on the same day Gemma had a get together planned. I would spend the morning with my family and be with Gemma, Clay and everyone else the rest of the day. An easy decision in my head but, my parents was, less than approving.

I sat by the window, waiting for Tig to get me to go to the good dinner of the day. My parents were, less than happy about me joining Sons of Anarchy when we had family over. My father sat down in his recliner and stared at me, "Which one is it?" he asked, propping his feet up.

"What?" I said, slowly tearing my eyes away from the window.

"Which member," he said again, irritation filling his voice, "Is picking you up? The one that you're more than likely sleeping with? Or, should I expect the whole group to show up?"

"Excuse me," I said, feeling my face flush red with anger, "What? Like… what?"

"Oh please, Gracie," he said, "Don't think we don't know," he scoffed, "Don't think the town doesn't know… work the garage by day, the pole by night."

"What the hell, Dad?" I said, standing up and grabbing my purse, "I haven't been sleeping with anyone… AT ALL," although, lately I'd wanted to do more that eat pancakes with Tig, "and, if you really must know," don't say it, "I've only ever tried the stripper pole once," I smiled, this was a good one and by the look on my family's faces, they believed it, "and, I was profoundly good at it."

"Damnit, Grace," my father said, standing up, "You are forbidden to go to that… that brothel ever again!"

I heard the most beautiful sound pull into my driveway, "Can it, Dad," I bolted for the door, "and, one more thing I work insurance paperwork and repo lists… not poles, asshole."

Tig was on his way to the door when I stomped past him, "Get on the fucking bike, Tig," I said, grabbing my helmet out of one of the saddlebags.

"Nice to see you too?" Tig said, staring back and forth from and my parents looking out the window, "You want me to go in there?"

"Only if you want to be accused of fucking everyone wearing a leather cut and being a stripper," I said, standing next to the bike, ready to go.

"Sonsabitches," Tig said, turning and sauntered toward the house.

"Whoa, whoa baby," I said, my face got red when I realized what I'd called Tig, "I mean… yeah, Tig… let's, uh, let's go," I stuttered and grabbed his arm and pulled him in a circle and back to the bike.

"Did you just call me-," Tig asked, slinging his leg over the bike.

I cut him off, "no… of course not," I scrambled for excuse, "I said, 'whoa maybe…' like, whoa maybe you shouldn't do that,"

Tig laughed and pulled out of the driveway, "Whatever you say," he smiled, "baby."

We slowly drove down the main drag of Charming, enjoying the beautiful weather, when we drove past David in his jeep, headed the other direction. Tig said nothing, but I felt him tense up when I saw him.

"Its okay," I said, giving Tig a squeeze. Tig silently disagreed and made a u-turn in the road, "Tig don't… please. I'll take care of it later. I don't need another fight today."

"Nope," he said, "We'll take care of it now."

I had learned to not try and fight Tig so, I held on tighter as he sped to catch up with David. We pulled up next to him at one of the two stoplights in Charming. David wasn't looking at us. I looked away and rested my head on Tig's back. Tig, on the other hand, was staring at David. One hand on the handlebar, the other rested on the knife against his leg. The light turned green but, neither one of us moved. Tig's little standoff was getting on my nerves after the third green light flashed. By now, there was a line of cars behind us and they were starting to honk. I had to lean over to fiddle with me shoe so they could see Tig's cut and the honking ceased. "David," I said, looking at him, "Just go. You're not going to win."

David didn't look at me but, pulled away. "I would have sat there all day," Tig said, turning around and heading toward Gemma and Clay's.

"I know," I said, resting my chin on his shoulder, "I've got better things to do, Tiggy."

"You can't just let him get away with it," Tig said, as we pulled into the driveway.

"I can," I said, becoming irritated with Tig, "and, I will. And, I really don't need relationship advice from you. Okay?" I walked toward the house with Tig following closely behind.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Tig asked.

We walked in the house and stood in the doorway for a moment, "Well, you're not the embodiment of morals and standards, Tig," I laughed, "I mean, c'mon… you of all people should know that a man can't stay with one girl for long." I walked into the house and realized everyone had heard our conversation, I laughed when I heard the guys giving Tig shit. David called me a few minutes later, Gemma silently listening to our conversation.

_Gemma snapped the ends off the fresh green beans as she listened to Gracie on the phone. "No David," Gracie said, her voice was shaking, "I'm not sleeping with him… I'm sure, do you think I would forget if I fucked him? … I can say whatever words I want! … No, I'm not sleeping with anyone… David! Leave me alone!"_

Finally, I ended the call, on the verge of tears, I tossed my phone on the counter, "Boyfriend?" Clay asked, handing me a beer.

"Ex," I replied. I leaned against the countertop and started in on the vegetable tray, "Is he pouting out there?"

"What else would he be doing?" Clay smiled, and leaned on the island that was full of food, across from me. Clay's face fell, becoming serious, "We've been talking Gracie," Clay began, "and, just want to… clarify, that you never told David anything about the club. Now that you two are, whatever you are, just want to make sure that David isn't going to go running to Judge Daddy."

"Clay," I said, "I never told him anything about the club. I never would, you know that."

"Good," Clay said, standing up and walking out, back to his boys, "Tig told me what happened, with your parents and David," he said, becoming the father I needed, "I'm sorry if we've made you a bad street rep," he said.

"I'd rather have a bad rep with you guys than a good one with them," I smiled, kissing his cheek.

"Nice," Clay said, walking back into the living room with the guys. A fight was on the television, the highlight of the afternoon.

I walked over next to Gemma and started slicing various vegetables for a salad, Gemma stood silent next to me, still snapping the beans, "Do you think I'm a slut?," I asked, turning to Gemma.

"What?" she laughed it off but, quieted when she looked at me, "Of course not baby, why would I think that?"

"My parents think so," I said, turning back to the vegetables, "David thinks so… people, everyone in Charming thinks so."

"Not the people who matter," Gemma said, turning to look at me. She tucked a piece of hair behind my ear and put her hand on her hip, "Clay and I don't, Jax and Opie and the boys… they don't. I know Tig doesn't."

I smiled, "Thank you."

"All those other people? They're jealous," Gemma said, with her signature smirk, "Jealous of what we've got: family, friends, power… they want that."

I heard a car pull up, close to the garage. I didn't think anything of it and went back to work. "What the fuck is he doing here," I heard Chibs say. The clanging of tools hitting the ground and workbenches followed.

"He's got balls," I heard Tig say.

Clay was the only I could see, still leaning against the table, "Not for long."

I poked my head out into the garage to see what idiot and shown up, unwelcome. My eyes widened when I saw David, hopping out of his ugly ass Jeep. "Shit," I said, walking towards Tig, Chibs, Juice and Jax that were standing in a line in front of David. I scooted between Chibs and Tig, "What are you doing here," I asked, folding my arms in front of me. I felt much more menacing with the four extremely "capable" men behind me.

"I wanted to see you," David said, quietly, "Apologize."

"It's a little late for that, shithead," Jax said, his hands in fists ready to find their target.

"Guys," I said, stepping in between all of them, "Give us a second." Jax, Juice, and Chibs silently turned around and walked back to the garage but, Tig stayed next to me, "It's okay," I said, putting my hands on his cut, "I can handle this on my own."

"No," Tig said, staring at David, "I'm not moving."

"Fine," I rolled my eyes and turned back around and looked at David, "What is it?"

"Spend the weekend with me," David said, "I wanna make it up to you… I've got everything planned out."

"No," Tig said, inspecting his fingernails.

David ignored him and went on, "I've got reservations everywhere, flowers… everything."

"No," Tig said again, nonchalantly.

"Thank you, Tig," I said, I stared at David for a second, "Breakfast. No flowers, no reservations… tomorrow morning. The Diner."

"Thank you so much," David smiled, walking up to me.

Tig coughed and stepped in between David and I, "I'll text you," I said, as Tig pushed me toward the garage.

"What the hell, Gracie," Tig said, holding onto the back of my neck.

"It's one meal, Tig," I laughed, "Are you getting jealous? I'm not your old lady."

"I know," Tig said, walking away as soon as we got close to the guys.

Tig ignored me the rest of the day, stomping around a pouting. I could have cared less though, we had been hanging out a lot but, it didn't mean I was his bitch. I was not and wouldn't ever be one of _those _girls. Duh.

"Pancake platter," I said, handing the waitress my menu.

"Same," David said, nonchalantly.

"So," I said, "What hap-," but, I was cut off as David's cell phone buzzed around the table.

"Oh," he said, excitedly, "I gotta take this… Hey Candy!" David was on the phone the rest of his meal with Candy. They sure weren't talking about studying. David had tried to convince me that Candy was a practical joker but, I informed him that we both knew they were fucking. I wasn't stupid. I could hear her high pitched laugh across the table and I had to grit my teeth. I let it go, knowing a fight wasn't what we needed to make things work. "She your new buddy," I asked, finishing my pancake platter while David started on his.

"Well," David said, "kind of."

"So, you kind of study together," I let out a sarcastic snort, "What do you two do when you're not kind of studying? "

David looked up at me, "Well, that's what I wanted to talk about."

My stomach tied itself into a knot, "What?"

"Well," David began, "I've met a lot of… new people…"

"I get it," I said, "Need some time off from the ole relationship, start seeing new people. Or, re-seeing new people. I figured that's what this was about, " I laughed, "You're too much of a pussy to say it at the garage though, aren't ya?"

"Yeah," David said.

I grabbed my purse and walked out of the café, stomping down the sidewalk. David didn't follow me. Jax and Opie would have. Tig would have. Everyone else would have.

I shivered as the wind blew across the roof, the smell of the timberland filled my nostrils and I closed my eyes, taking it all in. My hair blew around my face, I didn't bother trying to hold it down, there was too much of it. The air warmed around me again, the wind disappearing. I saw a vehicle pull into the parking lot and I realized it was David's.

_Tig sat in the garage, cleaning up. They really needed a Prospect. Now that Juice was done, Tig had lost his bitch. He leaned against the garage doors and looked out into the town. The breeze started to cool everything off as the sun dipped behind the hills. Tig saw Gracie sitting up on the roof. He started to walk inside but, turned to look at her again. He hadn't really noticed her before, not like that anyway. He felt a little weird, looking at her. He'd known Gracie since she was a kid. Gracie and Tig had always had a "thing". She would stay at his house sometimes when she would fight with her sister. Lately, he'd been feeling a little something more than protective over her. He was still mad at her for going with David today but, the attitude she came back with made him happy. He wanted to touch her, feel her. But, he knew she wasn't just one of the other girls that were lying around the bar and he couldn't treat her like one. He wasn't going to bring up the fact that he wanted her either. He would wait and just pound the other Crow Eaters in the mean time. He saw her stand up and make her way down to the parking lot, where David Hale's Jeep had parked. He waited for a few minutes, back in the shadows of the garage to make sure everything was okay before he walked into the clubhouse._

The wind blew again, this time; it was colder, "Let's go in the garage," David said.

"No 'hello' or anything," I said. We walked across the lot. A flood light lit the garage and the area around it. I hopped up on the workbench and stared at David, "Something you gotta say?" I said, finally breaking the silence. David fidgeted with his watch, he hated being here. It made him nervous.

"I want you to come back with me," David said.

"What?" I said, not expecting that.

"I talked to your parents," David said, "I'll take you to your house, get your things and you'll come back with me."

"But-," I started.

"I want you to marry me," David said, "I'm sorry… I messed up."

I looked around, "I can't leave," I said, thinking of Jax. Tara had left a few months ago and I was not about to leave him too, "This is my home." I stared at David and then laughed, "Didn't you just break up with me this morning?"

"You'll be safer with me," David said, "I love you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you," David paused as his phone rang, "Hang on," he said, walking away, "Hey Candy, what's up?" he waited for her reply, "Oh no way! Did he really do _that? _With _her? _He drank how much?"

I sat on the bench and felt my surprise turn to fury. Did he just propose and then tell me to hold on while he took a phone call with Candy… again? What was he thinking. "David?" I said, I could feel my face heating up with anger, "I think we were in the middle of something… important."

David held up his hand, "Hang on," and walked a little further away, "I'm talking to her right now..." He snapped to when I sent a wrench sailing past his face, "Holy shit… I gotta go."

I sent a screwdriver his way. He's lucky my hand-eye coordination sucked, "What the hell, Gracie," he yelled, walking my way.

I held up a giant wrench and walked towards him, "You never call me anymore! You cheat on me! You come home for one weekend, you say two words to me when you can find the time between texting your friends and talking to Candy, and then you break up with me in a café," I took a breath, "and then, you have the balls to tell me to marry you and move with you? And, then tell me to "hang on" while you talk to some hooker? I don't think so, you're confusing and fucking… pissing me off!"

"C'mon, Gracie," David said, "You know that I-"

I stopped him with a crowbar, "Go, David," I said.

David stared at me, "Fine," he said, "Call me when you aren't a crazy bitch."

"Mother fucker," I yelled, and tossed tools at him, "Don't you ever come back here! I'll shove this…" I looked down at whatever I was holding, "This thing! I'll shove it so far down your throat," I tried to think of where I was gonna go with this one, "You'll be able to build a house with your ass!" Okay, so it wasn't the best threat but, I was mad. And, it got the point across.

I didn't hear what David was yelling because of all the tools clattering around him, I finished the barrage of metal with one of the stools in the garage. It skidded behind his Jeep as David drove out. I turned around, fuming, and walked back into the garage. I stopped when I saw Tig, smiling in the doorway, "Got something you wanna talk about?" he grinned.

"That motherfucker just proposed to me," I yelled, kicking the bench, "Ow… fuck."

I sat on the floor and popped off my shoe, massaging my foot. Tig leaned against the workbench in front of me, "Usually," he said, "girls don't react like that when they're gonna get married."

"I am _not _marrying _him_," I said, disgusted, "He asked me and then he started talking on the phone with some girl," I didn't let Tig say a thing, "and _then," _I shouted, "he gave me the hand to the face! So I wouldn't interrupt him!"

"Oh no," Tig laughed, "He gave you… _the hand?_"

"Shut up," I said, pulling my shoe back on and walking out into the lot. I started to pick up the tools scattered around.

"Hey," Tig said, walking out, "Let's go, Juice will pick that shit up the morning," he tossed me his jacket.

"Where are we going?" I asked, slipping on the coat, it was two Tig's too big for me.

"Just for a ride," he said.

I didn't say no. I climbed on behind Tig and he handed me a helmet. I strapped it on and wrapped my arms around him. He was so warm, I wondered if I really even needed jacket. I rested my head on his shoulder as we slowly drove out of the lot and sped up when we reached the highway. I liked not having any place to go and I liked being around Tig. I scooted closer to him and he patted my hands that rested on his stomach. Tig's curls blew in the wind and tickled my face. The cold wind picked my hair up and whipped it behind me. I didn't know where we were but soon, the moon shone down on the road, setting everything in a milky white glow. We went through the hills, leaning with the curves in the road. We said nothing, both of us taking in our surroundings. The further we went; the smell of pine became stronger. Tig turned off onto a side road, the trees rose up around us. We went ten more miles down the little, gravel road and Tig pulled off into the woods. He turned off the bike and we sat there for a moment, "What are we doing here," I asked, jumping off the bike, I tossed the helmet at Tig while I looked around. The moon shown through the trees, dappling the forest floor, making the grass and pine needles silver.

"Just looking," Tig said, swinging his leg over and sitting on the bike, "It's relaxing."

I turned around and looked at Tig, "I never thought you'd be one of those nature boys," I laughed, "You got a Zen garden hiding around at home?"

"Nah," Tig smiled, "I just like it out here."

"It's pretty," I said, looking up at the stars, through the trees.

I heard clinking glass and saw Tig pulling two bottles of tequila out of his saddle bags, he tossed me one, "One for you and one for me."

"You know me only too well, Tigger," I laughed and took a bottle from him. Tig and I sat on a log and after awhile, we were both giggling and laughing. My body was warm from the booze and I had a smile plastered across my face. I thought about David. "You know," I said, quietly, examining the tequila in my hand, "I'll probably never see him again. This sucks. I love him. But… I don't know. Do I? I'm pretty pissed off at him."

Tig stood up and walked out away, stopping in between to massive pine trees. I grinned, ran up behind him and slapped the back of his knees making him stumble, "Gotcha!" I yelled, and took off into the woods.

"Shit," I heard Tig laugh, and I looked behind me and saw him running after me.

I let out a noise, somewhere between a scream and a laugh and took off dodging trees and jumping over rotting logs. The trees started to thin out and the ground turned softer. I turned around and saw Tig running behind me, I laughed harder and ran faster. I heard Tig laughing and I knew he wasn't slowing down anytime soon. The trees stopped and my feet sank into soft, cool sand. I few moments later, I splashed into the water. I stopped and looked back, I couldn't see him but, I heard Tig trampling through the trees, "Gonna get you, Gracie," Tig laughed.

I looked around, the moon reflected across the lake, perfectly still. I looked back into the woods and saw Tig coming out. I screamed, laughed and started to throw off my clothes. The water was cool but, not cold. I threw myself in wearing only a bra and underwear and waded out until I could barely touch. I turned around to see Tig throwing off his cut and unbuttoning his shirt, "Water isn't gonna stop me," Tig yelled, jumping in with his boxers on.

"Oh fuck," I said, regretting ever starting this one. I swam out further, laughing and out of breath.

I paused, swimming in place. I looked back and didn't see anything. I eased my way back to where I could touch the sandy bottom with my tippy toes. I screamed when Tig popped up out of the water next to me. I tried to swim away but, Tig caught my ankle and pulled me back, next to him. I laughed, splashing him and he splashed me back. Each time we pushed the water, we got closer to each other until we were nose to nose. We were silent as we stared at each other. I ran my fingers along his cheek, feeling the stubble that had accumulated there since this morning. He was good looking. Without another thought, I kissed him. Tig's wrapped one hand in my wet, heavy hair and the other found its way to the small of my back and pulled me towards him. I felt the heat from his body. I wrapped my arms around his neck as he kissed me harder. The cool air against my wet skin made me shiver. Tig moved his hands up to my bra and undid it. I pulled away and looked at him, holding up my bra with my arms. "I'm sorry," Tig said, and pulled away, heading back for shore.

I grabbed his arm, "Don't." I let my bra slide off and tossed it towards the shallows, it landed with a splat on the wet sand. I knew I'd probably regret the tequila and this in the morning but, right now… at this instant, I wanted Tig. More than anything, right now, I wanted him. I slid my hand into his and waded out until I had to bounce off of the bottom to stay above the water. Tig came up against me again, I ran my hands along his torso and up, over his shoulders. My bare chest rubbed against his. Tig's hands ran down my back and pulled my waist against his. His kisses fell on my face, hard and rough. Tig's hands pulled my underwear off, and they floated away. I craned my neck to find them but Tig pulled me back to face him, "I'll buy you some new ones."

I wondered if Tig was going to throw me away like he had my panties. He had a reputation for that. I disregarded the thought as Tig slipped off his boxers and I felt his cock against my thighs, warm and hard in the cool water. I wrapped my legs around Tig's waist, inviting him in. He held me up and I moaned as he slipped inside.

_Tig could barely contain himself. She was so warm, so tight. Gracie started to move her hips against his, making the water ripple around them. As she came down, against him, Tig pushed himself up, farther into her. She moaned and he enveloped her mouth in a kiss. Their lips touched but, the moans and cries that came from their mouths weren't muffled. It echoed across the lake. Tig felt Gracie's insides tighten up around him._

"I'm going to come," I said, out of breath.

"Go, baby," Tig said, pushing himself into me as far as he could.

My body clamped down on Tig, my legs wrapped tighter around him and I arched my back, letting my hair dip back into the water. We stayed that way for a few moments, Tig holding me up. I looked up at the stars and the moon. Tig pulled me back up so that we were face to face. He lifted me off of him and started to wade back to shore. I followed him, not saying anything. I was trying to comprehend what had just happened and why I didn't feel bad about it. Tig flopped down into the wet sand, smiling and stared up at the sky. I lay down on top of him, resting my head on his chest. His fingers ran up and down my back, "We should head back," I said, knowing my sister would be calling my phone any second.

"Yeah," Tig said, sitting up. I slid off of him so I sat between his legs. He kissed me again and I felt a wave of warmth blanket my body.

I was dry when I walked back into the house. The lights were out. I knew Donna was sleeping but, wouldn't be for long. Sure enough, the hallway light flipped on, "Where have you been?" she yelled, storming out into the entry way.

"With," I paused, not sure if I should tell her the truth or a lie. She might not believe the truth anyway. Oh fuck, I thought, " I was with Tig."

"Oh really," Donna said, crossing her arms, "I suppose you were out having wild, unprotected sex?"

"I'm on birth control," I said.

Donna's eyes got big, "What?"

"Oh come on," I said, rolling my eyes, "You knew I was on birth control."

"You had sex! With Tig!" she screeched, "What the fuck?"

I wasn't sure how to handle this. Well, she already knew. "Yeah," I said, "I did." I grinned, "And, I liked it."

"Ew," Donna said, "Don't talk to me… for nine hours."

"See you in nine hours," I laughed.

I woke up, a little sore from last night's adventures. Someone was pounding at the door and I flopped out of bed. "Gracie," I heard Opie yell, and Donna ran to the door.

"Why the fuck are you knocking?" I yelled at him and looked at the clock, "Its seven in the morning. Fuck." The tequila from the night before was doing a number on my head.

"You fucked Tig?" Opie yelled at me.

I turned to look at Donna who was really focused on the couch cushions, "You told him?" I yelled.

"Duh," Donna said, pissing me off with her casualness.

"C'mon, Gracie," Opie said, turning around when Jax walked in the door.

"You fucked Tig?" Jax said, shaking his head.

"Did you people fucking tell everyone?" I yelled, more angry than embarrassed but, still embarrassed, "It's not anyone's fucking business, anyway!"

I stomped in the kitchen, grabbed a box of cereal and slammed the Lucky Charms into a bowl, the result was half the cereal in my bowl the other half all over the kitchen. I heard the door open again and heard Gemma's voice, "Where is she?"

"I'm in here and yes, I fucked Tig," I said, letting the milk slosh all over.

Gemma followed by Opie, Jax and Donna. They all stared at me. I rolled my eyes, "I can do whoever I want." I shoved a spoonful of cereal in my mouth.

"Yeah," Gemma said, "But, you're putting yourself in a tough spot. What about David?"

"David and I are over," I said, slamming my spoon into the bowl and holding my head up against the cupboard above the counter.

"Okay kids," Gemma said, "Everyone out."

Jax, Opie and Donna all shuffled outside, "What happened, baby," Gemma asked, sitting at the kitchen table.

"It's none of your damn business," I said. My face turned red when I realized who I was talking to, Gemma's eyes got big and she put her hand on her hip, "I'm sorry," I said.

I told Gemma everything that had happened. She took it better than my mom ever would. "Well," Gemma said, staring at me with _that _look, "If you want it, go for it. But, just remember Tig ain't no David. And, he isn't the one to treat you like David, either."

"I know who Tig is," I said.

Gemma stared a little while longer. Just long enough to make it obvious she was a little disappointed in my man choice. I wondered if she'd wanted me to end up with Jax. That wouldn't happen. Ever.

"I'll see you later, baby," Gemma said, kissing me. I listened to her walk out and talk to everyone, "Leave her alone," someone said something inaudible, "Stop," Gemma cut them off, "She knows."

The door shut and I heard Donna go into her room and slam the door. I finished my cereal in silence. Well, I definitely enjoyed last night. Other than a little hung over, I was happy. I smiled a little when I thought about being with Tig. I quickly got dressed and drove over to his house. I knocked as I opened the door, it was silent, "Good morning," I said, walking into his bedroom. Tig was sprawled out on the bed, naked. He was sound asleep. I heard the toilet flush and the door to this bathroom opened. A woman, considerably older than me walked out, "Who's this?" I asked staring at Tig, who was snoring lightly.

"Emily Duncan," he said. Half a second later, Tig's eyes flew open, "Gracie!"

"Yeah," I said, "It's me." I turned around and walked out the door.

"Ah shit," I heard Tig say, "Get outta here," I wasn't sure if he was talking to me or Emily but, when she went stomping past me, it was obvious.

Tig shot in front of me, slammed the door shut, "We need to talk," he said. He was standing in a pair of dark blue, flannel pajama pants. He had bed head and his hair was double curly. I wanted him. His appearance was definitely not helping the situation.

"I don't wanna talk," I said, trying to get past him.

Tig pushed himself in between the door and I, "But, you're gonna."

"Tig," I said. I looked up at him and realized, I had no choice, "Fine," I walked over and threw myself into the couch, pouting, "I thought last night was… for real," I said, feeling stupid talking to Tig (of all people) about this, "that, we might actually be able to work. Obviously, I was just another lay."

"Wait a second," Tig said, sitting on the coffee table in front of me, "You can't expect me, of all people," (well, at least he admitted it), "to just up and attach myself to one bit- one woman."

I folded my arms and looked out the window.

"But," Tig said, "I'll take you out to dinner? How bout that? And, it'll be our secret."

I laughed, "Everyone knows. I told Donna and she told Opie, who told Jax, who told Gemma."

"Shit," Tig said, "I do not wanna go to the garage."

"I'm going home," I said, standing up. I was still angry. I had a mean hang over headache and I'd lost my favorite pair of underwear last night and I did not want to deal with any of this, "Call me."

"Kay," was all I got from Tig as I walked back to the car.

I saw Tig peaking out of the blinds as I walked pulled out of the driveway. Wait a second. I slammed on the breaks, turned around a pulled into Tig's driveway. I stomped back into the house. Tig was pouring a cup of coffee, "Kay?" I said, he looked up and spilled the coffee on his hand.

"Fuck," Tig said, "What?"

"Can you men say anything right?" I said, standing in the middle of the living room, "Can't you just say, 'hey, I had fun last night, let's get dinner." But, saying 'kay' gets me nowhere! What does 'kay' mean? Do you mean, 'kay, I like you and I'll call you' or 'kay, I'm not gonna call you and I'm gonna forget that happened' or 'kay-"

"Gracie," Tig said, holding up his hand, "Stop saying 'kay."

I walked toward Tig as he held out the cup of coffee, I passed him and grabbed the bottle of booze and took a swig, "Oh fuck, that's disgusting with toothpaste."

"What are you doing?" Tig said, laughing.

"Look," I said, holding up the bottle, "Look what you're making me do?"

"You're drinking it," Tig said.

"I'm trying to be mad at you," I said, "Would you please put on a shirt. _Please?"_

The corners of Tig's mouth pulled up, "Oh, I don't know," he said.

I slammed the bottle down on the counter, "I am trying to be mad," I huffed, "At you."

_Tig walked into the clubhouse, ignoring the stares from everyone. He went straight to his workbench and Opie came up behind him, "I told you," Opie said, "Not her. She doesn't get the whole, love em and leave em thing._

"_She does," Tig said, looking Opie in the eye, "And, who Gracie fucks and who I fuck is really none of your business," Tig said, casually._

_Opie retorted calmly, "Yeah, you're right but, if you hurt her… even a paper cut that she blames on you," Opie stepped closer to Tig, "I'll kill you."_

I hadn't been to the clubhouse in a few days but, Clay called me and told me that the paperwork was starting to pile up so, I had to face them. Tig and I had gone out every night since I had been at his house. Each day had ended with me spending the night with Tig. Donna was pissed. I had barely come home in the last week.

My birthday was fast approaching. Donna and my parents were headed to Arizona to visit with family while I stayed in Charming. This meant unlimited time with Tig, which made me giddy every time I thought about it. My birthday also meant David would be in town on spring break. It wasn't a problem for me but, after our last encounter, the guys would want nothing more than to show him a thing or two.

I spent my birthday eve and morning with Tig, he was wearing my favorite shirt of his, the dark blue one with the sleeves rolled up, "You look good in blue," I smiled, curling up next to him on the couch.

"Thanks," Tig smiled, handing me a small, poorly wrapped box, "I wasn't really sure what to get you," Tig smiled sheepishly, "I don't usually do the whole birthday thing."

"I'm sure it's perfect," I said, unwrapping the box. It was perfect, too. A silver necklace with a silver cross, bejeweled with crystals I could only hope were diamonds lay in the black fabric in the box, "Oh Tig… its beautiful."

"Yeah, I know," he smiled, leaning back on the sofa, with a beer.

I snuggled up next to him and we watched the never ending barrage of soap operas until we headed over to Gemma and Clay's for dinner.

We walked up Clay and Gemma's driveway, hand in hand, "Disgusting," Clay said, who was standing in the doorway.

"Happy Birthday," Clay smiled, scooping us both into a hug. We walked into the house where a wave of smells filled our nostrils cigarettes, leather, and Gemma's delicious cooking wafted through the air.

We walked into the dining room that was filled to the brim with people. Tig and I parted ways, hugging and well wishing. I found my way to the kitchen, where Gemma was putting food in various bowls and plates, "Thanks for all of this," I said, giving her a hug.

"Happy Birthday, baby," Gemma smiled, "the necklace looks nice on you, he did a good job."

"You knew," I smiled, running my hand over the cross pendant.

"That man," Gemma said, pointing two fingers holding at cigarette at Tig, "has been searching for a birthday present for you for weeks now."

I smiled, staring into the dining room. Tig was laughing with Bobby and Clay. "I like him," I smiled, "A lot."

"Tell me something I don't know," Gemma smiled, "Let's eat." The rest of the day was nothing short of wonderful. After stuffing ourselves to the brim we all found places on the couches, chairs and floor and watched television and napped until we were ready to eat again. I stayed behind to help Gemma clean up, Tig and Clay sharing beers and cigars in the living room. "You two pretty serious then," Gemma asked, handing me a dish to dry.

"I think so," I said, smiling.

"I had Clay talk to Tig about it all," Gemma said casually.

"Oh Gem," I said, feeling like a kid, "You don't have to… you shouldn't have… we can figure it out."

"Tig needs to know you're not another piece of ass," Gemma said.

"I understand," I replied, "Thank you."

"Are you coming to Charming's Chili Festival with me," I asked Tig, running a comb through my hair. Every year, Charming had a big party in the middle of town. They closed off the four way stop that crossed in the middle of Charming. Food and merchandise vendors set up in a big square, lights and stereo equipment lined the sidewalks and the confetti cannons that Unser had ordered were being set up on a few of the rooftops. A chili contest was held and Bobby always entered his secret recipe. I had never tried it but, Tig had and the outcome wasn't pleasant he informed me, "I couldn't swallow for a week… that shit is hot."

I had always gone with my family but, Donna had found out she was pregnant the other day and plans for a wedding were already in motion.

"I don't know, Gracie," Tig said, opening an eye from his nap on the couch, "I don't usually do that junk."

"Everyone else is going to be there," I whined, leaning over the top of the couch, "Please… I'll make it worth your while," I said, "I'll give you a blow job while we're there," Tig's eyes opened, "Ah," I smiled.

"Fine," Tig said, "I'll go."

We walked to the big party, the music and noises of the crowd getting louder as we approached. The cars along the sidewalk began to thicken as we got closer. My heart paused a moment when I saw a familiar green Jeep. Tig's hand found mine and he pulled me close to him, "I'm okay," I said, smiling.

"I know," Tig said, squeezing my hand.

We pushed our way through the crowd, Tig craning his neck to see Clay, Gemma and the rest of our family, some old friends caught my eye, "I'll find you," I said, walking into the throng of people. After making an appearance with "the old crowd" I began my search for Tig. I bumped in between people, saying hello here and there. I saw David's family, no David but, I went out of my way to avoid them. I finally caught sight of Tig, sitting on a picnic table with Clay, Gemma, Jax, Wendy, Bobby, Chibs and Juice. He nodded when he saw me and I waved. I began walking towards him when Tig's face fell and he stood up, Jax and Chibs with him. I stopped and turned around to see what they were staring at. David. I stared back at Tig and held up a hand, stopping them. I did the same with David, who was staring at me with a pleading look in his eyes. _This is your last chance, Gracie, _I thought, _Choose._ I looked back at Tig, whose hands and turned to fists. Jax's hand rested on his shoulder. Gemma was standing behind Clay and I could see the look in her eyes. I walked to David and kissed him.


	19. Chapter 19

"Good-bye, David."

_Tig felt his blood boil when Gracie walked to David. "What the hell," he heard Clay say behind him._

"_What is she thinkin'," Chibs said._

_Gemma saw Gracie say something to David, and Gemma smiled when she realized what was going on, "Just wait, boys," she said._

I kissed David once more and then turned around and pushed my way towards Tig, who scooped me up and looked at me, "Don't scare me like that ever again," he said.

He set me down and we all made our way to the beer stand which was conveniently placed next to Bobby's chili booth. I looked back once more but, I lost David's face in the crowd. Gemma came up next to me, "You just chose the rest of your life, baby. Don't forget it."

I smiled and nodded, words weren't needed for me at the moment. I wrapped my hands around Tig's arm, feeling the rough hair that rubbed against my palms. After a few beers in us, we were all laughing a joking, making fun of everyone who tried Bobby's chili.

When everyone was distracted, I whispered in Tig's ear, "Wanna take me up on that offer?"

Tig smiled into his beer bottle and took a swig, "Absolutely," he said, standing up and pulling me away from the crowd. I intertwined my fingers in his and squeezed.

I was sure that I had made the right choice, even if my family didn't approve, or David or Charming. I did. Tig would take care of me, comfort me and shelter me. With Tig, I had protection, love and a family. It might be a crazy, vigilante, leather clad family but…

I could live with that family.

I held a screaming Ellie while Tig rocked an even louder screaming Kenny, "Where the fuck-" Tig looked down at the baby in his arms, "Frick," he corrected himself, "Is your sister?"

"I'm sure she's on her way, baby," I said, picking up Ellie's favorite stuffed animal and shaking it in front of her face, it didn't work. She only screamed louder, causing Kenny to try and scream even more.

"Visiting hours were over about two and a half hours ago, Gracie," Tig said, "We fed them, changed them… why the fuck," Tig looked down again, "Frick… are we doing this?"

"Try burping him," I said, sitting Ellie down on the couch and handing her a sippy cup and a pile of toys, she sniffled but, finally, sat in content. I looked back at Tig, who had propped Kenny up, his little head resting of Tig's shoulder. Tig had his back turned to me, looking out the window. Kenny let out a gurgling sound and a stream of white liquid squirted out of Kenny's mouth and down Tig's back. Tig stopped rocking and slowly turned around, his eyes has big as saucers, "What just happened?"

I tried to remain as serious as possible, "Do you want me to lie?" Kenny made the same gurgling sound and another white river splattered down Tig's back, this time down his pants, causing Tig's eyes to widen even more.

"I'm gonna puke," Tig said, shoving Kenny into my hands.

I laughed as Tig gagged and heaved all the way to the bathroom. He came out with only his boxers on, a look that always made me smile. Kenny had fallen asleep after his little episode and I set him next to his sister, whose eyes were almost closed with sleep too. Tig walked up to me, "NO kids," he said, with all seriousness, "You got it?"

"Fine," I said, wrapping my arms around him and leaning my head against his chest, "As long as we can keep practicing making them?"

"I just got puked on," Tig said, "I'm not in the mood."

"You're always in the mood," I smiled, sinking down to my knees. I pulled down his boxers and intertwined my fingers in Tig's. Just as I opened my mouth, Donna walked in the door.

"Shit," Tig said, pulling his boxers up and slipping his hands under my arms and pulling me up.

"Seriously?" Donna said, standing in the doorway, "my kids are right there."

Tig pointed to the sleeping babies, "The little one puked on me… twice."

"So you thought it was a good idea to get your dick sucked in front of them?" Donna said, stomping around, gathering up the kids things.

"C'mon Donna," I said, I handed her a bag full of toys and she yanked it out of my hand.

"I'll find a sitter next time," Donna snapped at us.

"Whoa," Tig said, picking up Ellie as she woke up, "Maybe a nice, 'thanks for watching my kids all day'? You were supposed to be back hours ago."

Donna stared at us for a moment before balancing Kenny in one arm and Ellie in the other, "Whatever," she snapped and walked out the door.

I closed the door as she pulled out of the driveway, "She'll be back. She's just emotional, she always gets that way when she goes to see him."

Tig was sprawled out on the couch, where I handed him a beer, he grunted in appreciation. I crawled on top of him, resting my head over his heart, "Did you really mean… no kids… like, no kids right now or ever?"

Tig took a deep breath, making my head rise and fall, "We'll see."

Donna dropped the kids off at my house, once again. She sped off to see Opie. She hadn't let me go with her yet, I knew she wanted time alone with Opie but, it wasn't a conjugal visit or anything. But still, she had two more years to figure that out.

"C'mon kids," I said, holding a chubby toddler that was Kenny. He was growing so fast… he would be as tall as Opie, no doubt. Ellie toddled behind me and up to the door. We walked in and Ellie ran up to Tig, who had dozed off on the couch. She landed a good smack on his belly, making Tig jump awake.

"Hey Cinder-Ellie," Tig said, picking her up. He walked over to me, "How long are they staying this time?"

"Until Donna decides she's had enough alone time," I said, putting Kenny in his other arm, "I'll start lunch."

After a meal of macaroni and cheese with hotdogs, a favorite between Tig and the kids. All four of us settled in for a quiet afternoon of Sesame Street and Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

"Tig," I said, over Ellie's constant screaming, "Are you doing okay?"

Our peaceful evening of babysitting had turned into a night of poopy diapers and hell. Ellie had knocked over a vase (shattered), pulled over a table lamp (broken) and pulled half of my curtains of the wall (curtains rods, screws and surrounding plaster with them). I wasn't sure what Donna's house looked like but, I was sure it was a disaster area.

After going to change Kenny's diaper, Tig came out of the bedroom, shirtless and angry, "He pissed on me!"

I was too tired to laugh, "I'm sorry," I said, trying to calm Ellie. It was ten o'clock. Past ten o'clock. Donna was supposed to be home four hours ago. We were running out of diapers and patience.

"Ya know," Tig said, as I followed him back to the bedroom. A naked Kenny lay on the bed, examining his own tiny toes. A very dirty diaper lay next to him. Tig's shirt, wet and warm, was lying on the floor. He continued his rant when he saw I had entered the room, "Your sister has balls. She dumps her kids on us all the time and then shows back up whenever the fuck she feels like it."

"I know," I said, setting Ellie down next to her brother. I went to work on Kenny and his new diaper, "But, she's having a hard time without him."

"Hard time," Tig scoffed, "Hard time at the bar with her friends or getting her nails done."

"Tig," I said, "not now. Let's just focus on getting them to sleep." My necklace, the one Tig had given me, dangled over Kenny.

"I'm gonna say something to her," Tig said, sitting on the bed. Kenny and Ellie began to cry again, "Oh come on," Tig snapped, "Do we really have to deal with this shit?"

"Yes," I said, "Tig, just go out," I stood up and Kenny held onto my necklace, breaking the chain. The pendant went flying and clinked against the vent by the bed, "Oh no," I said, diving for the cross but, it slid between the cracks, "Damnit."

"Oh, that's just great, lemme go out and buy another one of those, cause that was easy and cheap" Tig said, walking out of the bedroom and slamming the door behind him causing Kenny and Ellie to cry louder. After a few minutes, the kids were sleeping. I left them on the bed and walked out into the kitchen and pulled a beer out of the fridge. I plopped down on the couch next to a silent, brooding Tig.

"Sorry," he said, taking a drink out of his own bottle.

"It's okay," I said, resting him head on his shoulder.

I was sound asleep when Tig nudged me awake, "Donna's here," he said, standing up and walking to get the kids. I looked over at the clock, one-thirty in the morning.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me," I said, jumping off the couch. I met my sister at the door, "Where the hell have you been?"

"Out," she said, walking past me.

"Oh that's real nice," I shouted, "You have no idea what we've been dealing with," I lowered my voice to an aggravated whisper as Tig brought the kids out, "my walls have holes in them, I'm a lamp and a table and my necklace is gone."

"Sorry," Donna said, taking her kids out the door.

"Ya know," I laughed, "We all miss him. But, it's time for you to step up, get your head out of your ass and take care of your kids."

"Bye Gracie," Donna said, getting into her car and driving away.

"Not even a thank you," I said, standing in my driveway, "Bitch."

"Let's go to bed," Tig said, holding the door open.

I walked inside and started the recovery from the day with the kids. The curtains and my poor walls looked horrific. I shook my head and walked to the bedroom, grabbing the toolbox from the closet on the way, "Whoa there Bob the Builder," Tig said, "What are you doing?"

"Getting my necklace," I snapped on the verge of tears.

I carelessly unscrewed the vent and yelped as the screwdriver slipped and cut my hand, "Dammit all," I said, squeezing the tip of my finger that was oozing blood.

"Shit," Tig said, lifting me off the ground and walking me to the kitchen.

I ran the cold water over it and felt my anger dissipating, "I can't keep doing this," I said, "I miss Opie, Jax is a mess… I can't handle it."

Tig sat me up on the counter and wrapped a band-aid around my finger. He sighed and looked at me, "It's always gonna be stressful, this life," he said, handing me a beer and opening one for himself, "You're already in it, in it all the way Gracie. Few more years, Opie will be back and things will be halfway back to normal. It's never gonna be those first few years, baby, you just gotta get used to that."

"I'm not sure if I'm ever gonna be used to it," I said, taking a sip of beer.

"You are," Tig said, kissing my forehead, "You are."


	20. Chapter 20

"Hey," Tara said, visiting me during her usual rounds.

"Hey, Tara," I said, sitting up in bed and wiping the tears off of my face. Tig hadn't come in to say good-bye before they left. I figured there was a good reason but, it was going to be at least a week before I saw him again, "Come on in."

"Well," she said, sitting on the bed and flipping out her phone, "They left a few hours ago. They have a satellite phone on the plane… Gemma wanted you to call her."

"What about Tig?" I asked, "Did he say anything to you?" Tara had filled me in earlier that she was going to help Gemma get out of here and go to Ireland, I wasn't surprised that the two girls were successful.

Tara smiled, "He's still here. He's in jail but, still here."

"What?" I said, smiling, it was bittersweet, "What's he doing in jail?"

"Long story," Tara laughed, "But, he was the only reason Gemma and the guys got to the plane. Don't worry though; I'll bail him out in the morning."

"My checkbook is on my purse, I'll pay for it Tara," I smiled; just happy he was still in Charming.

Tara smiled and walked to the door, "He'll be out by tomorrow, get some sleep." Tara left and the door slowly closed behind her. I looked at the bed and saw a prepaid, one of the many that was floating around the club and a piece of paper that said "Gem sat phone" and a number below it. I smiled, and dialed the number and waited a lengthy amount of time for the phone to connect.

"Yeah?" Happy's voice grunted on the other end.

"Hey Hap," I said, "Gem wanted me to call her."

"Sure," he said again, I heard the phone being passed around.

"Hey Gracie," Chibs voice said over the line, a surprise when I was expecting Gemma, "Hope you're feelin' better… wish you coulda came with us. Love ya kid"

The phone was passed around again, this time when it stopped Opie's voice spoke, "Hey Gracie," he said, "Take care of Lyla and the kids, okay? Love you, be careful."

Again, I heard the phone being passed through hands and Clay's voice was the next to speak, "How are ya, Gracie?"

"Better," I said, glad that someone had let me reply, "Are you guys okay? Sounds like you are."

"We are," he said, "Tell Tig thanks and we love him. Love you too."

"I get that," I smiled, "I'll let him know."

The phone passed around, once more, "Hey baby," Gemma said, "Sorry about the delay, the kids couldn't keep their hands off the phone."

"I don't mind," I said, leaning against my pillow, "Did you need to talk about me about anything?"

"Yeah, hang on," she said, I heard her get up and a few moments later a door shut behind her, "Note to self, cargo plane bathrooms aren't the prettiest. Anyway, I need you to take care of things for me, okay? Tara's brain is on the rocks. She needs a little support."

"What's up with her?" I asked, glancing at the door for any nurses or, Tara.

Gemma paused, "She's pregnant."

My heart sank, I knew what was going on, "She doesn't want it, does she?"

"Keep an eye on her," Gemma said, "And, Tig and Kozik… make sure they don't fight too much. We need them to work together… at least until we get back. Make sure Lyla is doing okay with the kids and that Chucky doesn't scare too many customers away."

I was still stuck on Tara not wanting the baby, "I will," I said, absentmindedly.

Gemma knew, "You gotta let it go, Gracie. That baby is gone."

"I know," I said, choking on tears, "I was just ready for it."

"I gotta go, sweetie," Gemma said, "I love you. So much."

"Love you, too," I said, "Bye Gem."

I was feeling… more than depressed. David's funeral had come and gone. Tig was busy with what was left of the club and his visits were less than frequent. I hadn't seen Kenny or Ellie in days. Everyone had been in Ireland for only a day and a half now. I was sore, tired and bored. The thought of not being pregnant, no baby, was killing me. Everything reminded me of it. I felt empty and alone.

Tig stopped by one afternoon, the day after Tara had bailed him out, and he sat through a session of physical therapy with me. The therapist sat on the bed, while Tig watched in silence. "Now," she said, "what would you like to work on?"

I glanced over at Tig and knew what would make him happy, "I'd like to work on my hip… being able to… spread my legs again would be nice."

Tig mouthed the words, "I love you," and had to cover his mouth to conceal the grin that had spread across his face.

Turns out, after being shot in the hip, making your legs spread wide enough to have sex with Tig was… harder than one would think.

An hour later, I was sore and tired so, the PT left, leaving me and Tig alone. I scooted over in the bed so he could lounge with me. I rested my head on his shoulder and played with his fingers, comparing mine to his. "When are you gonna bust me outta here," I asked, looking up at him.

"As soon as you're whole," Tig said, kissing my forehead and talking against my skin.

"I'd get better faster if I was home," I said, closing my eyes and resting my head against Tig, "You know," I smiled, "We've been together for… a long time now and, if memory serves me correctly, I can count the times you've told me you love me on one hand?"

"I love you," Tig said, I could tell he was grinning.

"Still one hand," I laughed.

"Alright," Tara said, handing me the forms to sign, "Just need you to sign and date these and you are out of here," I handed the signed slips back to her and she handed me more papers, "this is your physical therapy schedule and a list of the exercises to do at home," Tara looked at me and Tig. Tig had his hands on my waist, his hands twitching, "and… I wouldn't try sex for at least another couple of weeks," she said, "sorry guys but, it's probably gonna be painful if you start back up right away."

"That's okay," I said, sore enough as it was, I couldn't imagine Tig having his way with me after a few weeks of nothing; he could barely keep his hands off of me as it was. I stood up, cringing as the blue jeans Tig had brought me rubbed against my sore hip.

Tig's hands shot around me, "Are you okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, could you wheel me out of this place? I don't think I'll make it to the elevator, let alone the first floor." Why they had the people who couldn't walk on the third floor was beyond me.

"You got it baby," Tig said, walking to the door and disappearing as it shut behind him.

Tara sat down next to me, "How are you two doing? Handling the baby and everything?"

"We're okay," I said, smiling through tears, "We'll get through it. There's nothing we can't handle anymore."

Tara tried to give me a reassuring laugh, "Yeah, I guess so… if you ever need to talk about it with… someone who isn't wearing leather and had a beer in their hand… I'm here."

"I feel like… like, I let everyone down," I blurted out, "Everyone was so excited, Tara… Tig, Gemma… me. And now, now I don't get another chance. I'm sick of losing everything. My parents, David, Donna, Abel… now this? I don't know how much more I can take."

Tig came back in the room, "You're chariot, my lady," Tig said, wheeling the chair up to me.

Tara grabbed Tig's arm, "Can I have a moment?"

"Sure, Doc," Tig said, he looked down at me, "Don't roll away."

_Tig quietly shut the door behind him, staring at Tara, "Everything okay?"_

"_Gracie," Tara said, "She's healing on the outside but, I can tell you right now… she's not okay with losing this baby. I've known her since we were five and, she's not okay."_

"_I know," Tig said, pulling the curtain back. Gracie was talking to one of the new prospects. She was making him blush, it was the bigger one with curly hair. Tig could never remember his name but, he was gaining brownie points by making her smile._

"_I think… I think she needs to know that you're okay," Tara said, staring at Tig._

"_If I'd have been there," Tig said, quietly. Tara was surprised by his sudden change in demeanor, his guard let down, "If I'd have been there I would have been able to protect her."_

"_This is not your fault," Tara said._

"_No bitch has ever made me feel this way, Doc," he said again, "None. I love it and I hate it. I can't get anything done without worrying about her. If I'd have been there, none of this would have happened. We'd still have a baby, she wouldn't be hurt."_

"_She's strong, Gracie is a strong girl. Look at her, look what she's been through. But, this… she's not strong enough for this," Tara opened the door, ending their mini-therapy session, "Just talk to her."_

Tig wheeled me down to the doors and I slowly made my way out to the van that sat with three bikes in the "patient loading and unloading zone". Piney and Kozik came out from the hospital, "Hey boys," I smiled. Tig lifted me into the van and kissed me. I ran a hand through his hair and wrapped the other, too sore to lift, around his waist as his hands found the bottom of my shirt, "Wait," I smiled, kissing him lightly on the nose, "At least till we get back."

"If you're too sore baby," Tig said, putting his hands around my face.

"I've got plans for you," I smiled and turned into the car seat and pulled the door closed.

"Get me outta here, Prospect," I said, pointing to Piney, Kozik and Tig who were driving away.

"Yes ma'am," he said, keeping his eyes focused in front of him, he looked nervous.

"Call me Gracie, Prospect," I said, leaning my head against the seat, "callin' me ma'am makes me feel old." I winced whenever the van hit a pothole, "You could watch those bumps, kid," I said, holding my shoulder.

"Sorry ma'am," the Prospect said, he shot a terrified look in my direction, "Gracie."

The Prospect swerved over the road the rest of the way home, causing Tig to shoot the van dirty looks through Charming. "What the hell, Prospect," Tig said, helping me out of the van.

"It's okay, Tig," I said, hanging onto his arm. I wasn't letting go him, not for a long time, "It was either hit every pothole with a lot of pain or swerve with only a little."

We all walked into the clubhouse, I could feel the tension between Tig and Kozik. The way they looked at each other made me nervous. Piney and Kozik disappeared down the hallway, dragging their feet. They all needed sleep, desperately. Gemma and the crew had been in Ireland for a few days now and we hadn't heard a word from any of them, "Can we call? Do they have cells?" I asked from behind the bar, opening a bottle of water and popping some pain pills into my mouth. I had graduated to oxycotin, a lovely little friend that made me feel fantastic. A little loopy but, absolutely no pain. I pulled a beer out of the fridge and handed it to Tig, leaning against the bar in across from him.

"We'll have to wait until tonight, kids are all sleepin' right now," Tig said, picking up the orange bottle of pills, "You uh, gonna need all these?"

"You can have the leftovers," I smiled, "Crackhead," I reached across and pushed his helmet hair back, away from his face, "I missed you."

Tig stood up and walked behind the bar, "C'mon," he said, bending over and scooping me up.

"Why, chivalry has not died," I said, in a horrid southern accent, "Indeed sir, take me, a wounded damsel, to her bed chamber."

"Yeah, okay," Tig said, rolling his eyes, "and you said I was the crackhead."

"I gotta pee," I said, when Tig sat me down and I rushed to the bathroom. It was good to be home. No one was poking me, asking me questions or cleaning me. I just wanted to sleep, next to Tig. No interruptions.

I stripped down to the tank top and underwear that I was wearing, the less touching me the better I felt, and made my way back into the room. Tig was lying on the bed, in his boxers, the sheets pulled down on inviting me in. Tig smiled, "You know, you're not really helping me with the no sex deal when you look like that."

"Sorry," I said, crawling into the soft, familiar sheets and curling up next to Tig. We fell into our usual position, Tig sprawling and me, as close as possible to him, my head on his chest.

Tig fell asleep in a few minutes, I couldn't. I wanted to call Jax. Talk to him, Gemma. I wanted to see Kenny and Ellie. I even wanted to see Lyla. Finally, as the sun started to peak through the curtains, my eyes closed and I fell into a much needed, if uneasy, sleep.

"Gracie," Tig said, nudging me, "Wake up… Gem's on the phone."

I slowly opened my eyes and stretched. Tig was standing over me, holding the phone to his ear, "She's wakin' up… sleeping beauty's been snoring all day." I sat up slowly and held out my hand, "Here she is, take care darlin'."

Tig handed me the phone and started to walk out but, I caught his arm and made him stay, "Hey Gem," I said, smiling at Tig.

"Hey baby," she said, I could tell she was smiling, "Feeling better?"

"Much better, now that I'm home," I said, running my fingers up and down Tig's arm, "How are you?"

"Bored," she said, "Stuck in the house all day."

"I know how you feel," I said, "I take it you don't have Abel then?"

"We'd be home if we had him," she said, "But, we're getting closer, everyday… we get closer."

"Good," I said, "Is Jax there?"

Gemma sighed, "No," she said, "They're all out," someone said something to her that I couldn't hear, "I gotta go baby, I'll call you later."

"Bye, Gem," I said, getting ready to hang up.

"Hang in there baby, I love you," Gemma said, hanging up the phone.

I lay by down on the bed and pulled Tig on top of me and kissed him. He propped himself up so he wasn't pressing down on me, afraid he might hurt me. I wanted him so badly, I was coming up on a month of no sex. I'd done it before but, I'd had distractions… this time, Tig was right there, waiting for me. I smiled, "We could try," I said quietly, "It wouldn't hurt… well, it would but, maybe not…"

"It's up to you," Tig said, already undoing his belt.

"Never hurts to try," I giggled. I hadn't laughed in a long time.

I sat up a little, trying to get my underwear down but, Tig gently pushed me on the bed, "I got this."

Tig pulled down my underwear and slowly lifted off my shirt, the bruises were still there but, not black anymore, they were turning a nasty shade of green and yellow on the outsides of the circles. Tig's hands ran up and down my legs, making goosebumps appear. His rings were cold. He pushed his mouth onto mine, gently. Almost too gently for Tig, "You don't have to be careful," I said, in between a long kiss, "I'm not completely broken."

Tig kissed me again, his hands touching more than my legs. Our breathing became ever, I felt Tig's dick harden and it began to rub in between my legs as Tig kissed and caressed me. He ran his mouth over the stitches that held my injuries together, pleasure and pain took over my body as Tig began to kiss my neck, collarbone, stomach and finally he looked up at me, "Tell me when it hurts?"

"Just do it," I said, almost begging. Tig pushed her uninjured leg to the side and gently lifted the other over his shoulder. I felt his breath on my legs as he kissed me. I watched his face disappear between my legs, I gasped as his warm tongue started slowly, gently. His rough hands brushed up and down my legs, stroking my inner thighs. I reached down and tangled my fingers in his hair, softly pushing him into me. As his movements became faster, I began to pant and I felt Tig smile, a reaction to my pleasure, causing him to work harder. I couldn't contain myself anymore.

"_Fuck it," Gracie said, and pulled Tig's head up by his hair, "Just fuck me, okay? I don't care what they said not to do… I need you to do it."_

_Tig stood up, slipped off his boxers and position himself over me. He gently pushed my legs apart and pain shot down my leg, "Oh fuck," Gracie said, slamming my head back on the pillow. _

_Tig panicked and jumped off of her, "I'm sorry, we won't do it."_

_Gracie positioned herself, spreading her legs enough to let Tig in, "C'mon, baby," she said, "Can't stop now," she smiled, "especially when you're at full attention, Marine."_

_Tig positioned himself over Gracie, once again, he looked down at her and she nodded. He slowly pushed himself into her and groaned, "That's been a long time comin'." _


	21. Chapter 21

_Tig walked out of the bathroom and buttoned his shirt. He stopped in the doorway and stared at Gracie, who was asleep in the bed. She rolled over, exposing her back. The bullet holes were now just red, raised reminders. She kept herself busy; he knew she was trying to keep her mind off of the baby and Hale. She was tough. Any other girl would have given up and left him. But, there she was sleeping soundly. She was too good for him. He walked over to her and sat down on the bed, resting his arms on either of her. She turned and looked up at him, "Morning," Tig said, grinning. He loved the way she looked when she first woke up, her hair covered her pillow._

_Gracie ran her hands up and down his arms, "What do you want for breakfast, like I should ask," she smiled. She sat up, holding the sheet against her body. She kissed him; they were long past the worries of morning breath, "Are you staying here today?"_

"_Yeah," he said, "Need to keep the garage open… we're not sure how to work the computer… or do paperwork… or anything that has to be done in the office."_

"_That's what I'm here for," Gracie smiled and kissed him again, "I'm glad you stayed… I know you wanted to go but, I'm glad you stayed."_

_Tig pushed Gracie down on the bed with a kiss and straddled her, "Me too," he grinned._

I was in the little kitchen, washing up the dishes from dinner. I'd made the little family, Tig, me, Piney, Kozik and the Prospects, a spaghetti dinner. Things had been quiet for the day. I stacked the plates and lifted them into the cabinet. My shoulder was healing nicely, after my romp with Tig, everything seemed a little better. Maybe a good roll in the hay was what I needed. Tig pushed open the door, making me jump and drop the pan I was holding. "You," Tig pointed at me, "Do not leave this clubhouse. You understand me? Don't even go outside."

"What's wrong," I asked following him out into the bar.

"Tara and her boss," Tig said, pushing a fresh clip into his gun, "some prick's got them hostage… wants Alvarez dead and a shit ton of cash."

"Holy shit," I said, following Tig to the door, "Does Jax know?"

Tig turned around, "No," he said, "Don't tell him either. He's got too much shit goin' on over there. Do not tell anyone," Tig turned to walk outside and I instinctively followed, he pushed me back into clubhouse, "Stay inside, Gracie."

He walked to this bike and drove off, followed by Piney and Kozik. I turned around and the two Prospects, looking worried and out of place stared at me, "Anyone know how to play cards?"

"Shouldn't you be worried," the skinny Prospect asked, picking at the edge of his cut.

I rubbed my face, "Look kids," I said, "I've been around this club my entire life," I added up the years and realized how long it really had been, "and, things like this will work out… they always do. They'll have her back by tonight, no problem."

I cleaned the clubhouse the rest of the day, bored out of my mind. Gemma wasn't answering her prepaid, Tig wasn't keeping me updated and the Prospects were horribly shy. By the time Piney, Kozik and Tig came in the sun had set, the clubhouse was sparkling and the smell of Pine-Sol filled the air. "Where's Tara," I asked, passing out three, cold, much needed beers.

"Still missing," Piney grunted.

I looked at Tig, "What happened," I asked, rubbing my shoulder, the spring cleaning of the club used all the elbow grease I could muster and I was feeling it.

"Shit happened," he said, staring at Kozik. I figured it wasn't anyone's fault but, Tig probably found it easier to blame it on Kozik, "I'm going to bed," Tig said, walking to our room.

"Good night boys," I said, kissing Piney on the cheek and giving Kozik's shoulder a squeeze.

"Night Gracie," they said.

I slipped into the room, Tig was lying face down on the bed. I changed into some pajamas and sat on Tig's butt, "Hey," I said, tugging on his hair, "What's going on?"

"Don't worry about it," Tig said, rolling over so he was on his back, looking at me.

I smiled, "But, I wanna worry about it. I wanna worry about you."

"Don't get mushy on me now," Tig said turning over, he sat up on his elbows and stared at me, "What? You've got a weird look on your face."

"Do you know what tomorrow is?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"Friday?" Tig guessed.

I rolled my eyes, "I'm not gonna be one of those women but, after thirteen years of," I wasn't sure what to call this relationship, "going steady…"

"It's been thirteen years?" Tig said, "Holy shit… What am I doing with my life? Spending it with a magnet for bullets and despair."

"Hey, shit dick," I said, pushing him down on the bed and kissing him, "Tomorrow happens to be my thirty-third birthday."

"Thirty-three?" Tig laughed, "That's it? That grey tells me otherwise."

"What?" I jumped off of Tig and ran to the bathroom mirror, "I don't see any grey, asshole."

"I'm just kidding," Tig said laughing, "There's no room in that hair for a grey one."

"You're mean," I said, lying down beside him, "But, I dig it."

Tig smiled, "Your poofy," he said, grabbing a fistful of my hair and shaking it, "But, I dig it."

"Oh, Mr. Funny," I laughed and rested my head on his chest, "I love you." Tig grunted. I looked up at him, "You know, over the span of thirteen years you've said that like, three and a half times."

"First of all," Tig smiled, "I'm not one to vocally profess anything but, my love of pussy, booze and guns. Second, I love you."

"I accept that," I said, quoting my favorite chronic masturbator."

The guys came back another day, empty-handed. After the first night without any progress, I began to worry. After the failed attempt with the help of Stahl and her gang, I began to panic. Jax came back a day later.

I paced the parking lot, waiting for the van to drive in and unload. I missed everyone so much. Finally, one of the Prospects pulled the gates open and the black cargo van pulled in. I could see Happy driving, Gemma in the front seat. It pulled to a stop and I walked as quickly as possible up to the doors as they slid open. Jax jumped out of the van and I scooped him up. He buried his head in my shoulder, "I missed you," he said quietly.

I didn't want to let go but, I saw Gemma and quickly walked over to her, "Hey baby," she smiled and brought me up to her, "You look better."

"Yeah," I smiled, "I just needed to get home."

"Well," she smiled and handed me Abel, "We're all here now."

"Hey baby boy," I laughed, "You're huge!"

"All those potatoes," Clay smiled and kissed me on the cheek, "Missed you."

We all sat around the clubhouse, I sat wedged between Jax and Opie, holding Abel. We talked about Tara and what we were going to do with the next few weeks. Jax went to bed early, I knew he wouldn't sleep. Everyone stayed in the safety of the clubhouse, Tig and I gave our bed to Gemma and Clay.

We slept on the couch, pretzeled together to keep from falling off, "What's going to happen now," I asked Tig, running my fingers through his curls.

"Anything," Tig said with his lips against my forehead.

"As usual," I said, falling asleep.

Gemma woke Tig and I up to help her cook breakfast. She had already gone to the store and bought an apocalyptic amount of eggs, bacon, pancake mix and milk.

Tig hopped on a bar stool next to Clay, who was holding Abel. I took Abel and held him close. By now, I would be a few months away from having a baby. Tig saw the look on my face, the empty womb look, and took Abel, "Go help, Gem," he said.

I shook off the emotions, something I was getting used to and walked into the little kitchen behind the bar.

_Clay took a sip of hot coffee and watched Gracie walk away and Tig cradle Abel, "She still wants a baby, eh?"_

_Tig never took his eyes off of Abel, he smiled, "Yeah, she does."_

"_Do you," Clay asked, nonchalantly. He knew he was the only person Tig would talk to about this. He wasn't even sure if he would have talked to Gracie about it._

_Tig paused and raised his head, his usual goofy yet, terrifying grin on his face, "With Gracie? It'd be nice."_

"_Well," Clay said, leaning against the back of the stool, "Judging by the amount of sex you guys have I wouldn't be surprised if it works someday."_

_Tig only laughed._

I cracked the eggs and poured them into the giant bowl. Gemma and I worked in synchronized silence. Finally she spoke, "I'm proud of you," she said, leaning against the counter and staring at me.

"Do I get a sticker," I laughed.

Gemma scoffed and I knew it would be one of those talks, "I'm serious," she said, "You're more of an old lady than any of us could ever expect to be," Gemma continued to stare at me, "I'm serious," she said, "When someone around here talks about loyalty, I tell them to go look at you. What this club, what this family stands for, is what you are."

I wiped a happy tear away from my cheek, "Thanks Gem," I said.

We talked quietly after that. Ignoring the fact that today could be the last time we see some of them. Breakfast and kidnapping Jimmy O, we should be used to it but, today was the most dangerous of them all.

Gemma and I set the food out on the bar as everyone began to fill up the clubhouse. Jax and Tara came out, "Hey," I said, hugging him. I missed him, "Don't ever leave again."I had never been without Jax and Opie for so long. I moved over to Tara, pulling her close.

"I'm glad you're okay," I said, kissing her cheek, "And, I'm glad you decided not to go through with the, you know."

"Me too," Tara whispered.

We all ate together, scattered around the clubhouse. Tig kept his hand on the small of my back; he kept kissing my head, face and ears. I didn't mind but, it wasn't Tig. He either really needed sex or wanted something new and shiny. He was never cute and cuddly around anyone but me.

Opie and Lyla came in a later, both grinning. Opie's voice made us jump, "Everybody listen up," he yelled and we all became silent. I wrapped my arms around Tig and rested my head on his chest, "Lyla's got something to say."

We all waited for a few moments and then Lyla raised her hand and I realized what was happening, "We're getting married," she grinned, happy as I had ever seen her. Even Opie was smiling.

I felt Tig hold me tighter, "Hey," he said, against my forehead, "Its okay."

"I know," I said, faking a smile, "Its great."

I cheesed it up until Tig and I could slip out into the garage, after we hugged and congratulated Lyla and Opie. I threw a wrench at the wall and it bounced off, clanging on the ground, "A porn star, Tig?"

"I know," he said, leaning against the workbench. He was silent, his arms folded, leaning against the workbench.

I grabbed my hair and stared at the ceiling, "My sister is being replaced by a porn star?" I picked up another wrench and sent it sailing past Tig, it thudded on the door. A few seconds later, Juice came walking into the garage. Tig shook his head and Juice looked at me, then back at Tig and backed out. Jackson came in a few moments later. Tig gave him the same gesture as Juice but, Jax ignored him, "Can I just be alone right now?" I said, accepting a hug from my best friend.

"Sure," Jax said, "But, if this is what is gonna make Ope happy then we leave it be."

"That's why I'm out here, Jax," I rolled my eyes, "I just can't believe he didn't tell any of us. And, I can't believe it's her. I wouldn't have let him if he'd of said anything about it."

"Exactly," Jax said, pulling my hair, "Leave it alone."

I picked up another wrench and chucked it as Jax walked out. I saw a beat up metal trash can, picked up a crow bar and beat the hell out of the trash can. Tig came up behind me and gently held my arms, taking the crow bar out of my hands and throwing it on his workbench. I turned around and threw my arms around him, "I miss her," I said against his Sergeant of Arms patch.

Tig sucked in a breath, "I'm sorry."

Every memory and every emotion from the past few years came flooding back to me. And in one flash, in one moment I realized the one thing that had never changed, probably would never change was Tig. He was the only one in my life that knew _me. _Gemma, Clay, Piney… no one could ever possibly know as much as Tig did. Not Jackson or Opie. Tig knew. He knew what buttons to press and which ones to stay the fuck away from. He knew I liked to mix maple and blueberry syrup on my pancakes and I always had a craving for chocolate after sex. He knew I wouldn't drink my coffee if it was too hot and he knew that I thought I was a superstar in the shower. He knew that I missed my sister. How much I wanted to see David again. He knew how to touch me after really great sex, how to make me want more. He knew how much I wanted a baby, one of our own. What he didn't know was that I had utterly and completely forgiven him for everything he had ever done. Most people would have killed Tig a long time ago. But, I couldn't live without him. When we were apart I only thought of him. When we were together I was happy, no matter what. He was it. We had both sacrificed too much too not be together. Tig had paid his price for his past. He was still paying it. Every time he saw Opie, the kids, me. I knew what he was thinking. The point of no return had come and gone the night Abel came home. I loved Tig and we were bound to Charming, Sons of Anarchy and each other. Forever.

We all gathered in the parking lot. I clung to Tig, thanking God he was safe. We were all somber; Jimmy O. was ours, now what? We heard the short siren of a squad car and turned our heads to the gates at the end of the parking lot. Four or five black cars with tinted windows pulled into the parking lot. Following them, a large, armored truck came to a stop.

Tig pushed me behind him, standing possessively in front of me. I held onto his hand with both of mine. Agent Stahl gracefully and nonchalantly stepped out of the car that had led them in. She walked past Tig and I, looking us up and down. She stopped and smiled a wicked smile, "I'm not sure why you left David," she said quietly, loud enough for only Tig and I to hear, "He was good in the sack. Probably better than Mr. Trager here. Of that I have no doubt."

"Stupid bitch," I yelled, loud enough for everyone to hear. She walked away and I went after her but, Tig caught me around the waist, spinning me around away from everyone.

He pressed his mouth to my ear, "Just wait." He pushed me over to Gemma, who wrapped her arms around me, "Stay," he pointed at me and walked to Tig's side.

"I hate it when he does that," I whispered, and Gemma gave me a reassuring squeeze.

The next few moments went by too quickly for me to comprehend. I watched, dumbfounded as a man in a suit and sunglasses handcuffed Tig. My heart raced as I ran over to Tig and threw my arms around him. "Its okay," I heard Stahl say.

Tig pressed his head down, against mine, unable to hold me, "Don't worry," he said, so indifferently that I thought he might be going to buy cigarettes at the gas station.

"Fuck you," I said against his chest.

"Let's go," the cop said, pushing Tig along.

I stumbled backwards and Lyla came up behind me, holding me back from Tig. He turned around before he hopped into the back of the truck and winked. Bastard. I turned around, horrified and saw Gemma with the same look on her face. She stared as all of them were loaded up into the back of the truck. Jax was last. The placed him on the opposite side of the truck. He stared at me as they closed the heavy doors.

"This cannot be happening," I said as they pulled out of the parking lot.

"Oh yes it is," Stahl said, coming to stand next to me, "And your best friend is the cause of it all. Have a great day."

She sauntered off to her car before getting in a driving away, a smirk of triumph on her face.


	22. Chapter 22

Hey guys! It's been awhile! Sorry for the wait! It's good to see people are still reading after all this time! Anyway, I wanted to give a quick blurb out for Tignation! If you guys haven't been over there yet, get there! It's a SOA thirst quencher (if that can ever happen!) anyway, it's a great site with great people! I love it! So, head on over there!

I'm working on more chapters now (and they WILL be uploaded… thank you, new computer!) I just need to brag… this new computer be awesome. It's a touchscreen… I pretty much feel like Tony Stark… who has a crush on Tig. Yeah. It happens.

Have fun reading! And don't forget to review! I love to hear from you guys! And if you have any ideas for the story, I'd love to hear those too! (p.s. Gracie isn't gonna get the tattoo… we'll explain later!)

Catch you on the flip side.


	23. Chapter 23

_Gracie had fallen asleep on Gemma and Clay's bed, she wasn't talking to anyone. Gemma, for the first time, didn't know what was going on in Gracie's head. She couldn't tell if she was angry or sad. Gemma joined her with Abel, the three sitting there in silence. Gracie wore a black tank top and Gemma ran her fingers over one of the round, red scars on her back. Gracie stirred and turned to look up at Gemma, "I can't go that long without him," she whispered, panic etched on her face, "It's too long."_

_Gemma opened her mouth to say something but, she felt the same way. She was scared. She had no idea where Opie, Chibs, Piney or Kozik were. She was afraid. No security. No safety. She had the gates to the garage closed and padlocked until further notice. Until she decided it was safe, Clay would tell her. She panicked, Clay wasn't here. No one was._

_Gemma watched Gracie get up and silently walk out the door. She looked down at Abel; she finally had him back but, lost everyone else._

_The bigger prospect of the two, Filthy something… she had no desire to remember at this point, handed her an envelope, "Jax wants you to burn it when you're done."_

_He walked out. Gemma opened the letter._

_Gracie joined Tara and Lyla in the kitchen. Lyla took the hint that Gracie was a little sore about the engagement still, so she preoccupied herself with Piper, Kenny and Ellie. Leaving Tara and Gracie alone. Tara went to pour Gracie a cup of tea, steaming on the stove. Gracie held up her hand and shook her head, pulling the bottle of whiskey off the top the counter and taking a swig, she shuddered as the taste coated her mouth and throat. She grabbed Gemma's pack of cigarettes, pulled one out and lit it, wheezing a bit. It had been awhile since her last one. She had a hard time concealing her shaking hands while she held the cigarette. Tara wasn't sure what to do. As if Gracie read her mind, "I don't really know how to handle this," she said, her voice shaking, "I've been without them before, when Tig and I split up," her voice sounded somewhere between desperation and hysteria, "But, I could have always gone back, had them all whenever I needed. Not this time. They're gone." Gracie took another drag on the cigarette. She organized the pile of booze, cigarettes and handguns she had gathered on the counter. Tig would have been proud. _

_Tara stared at Gracie, she had been so strong lately. A stone against the tidal waves that had crushed down upon her. It scared Tara, to see Gracie and Gemma like this. Both of them were the leaders here and both seemed lost. _

_The doorbell rang. Gracie dropped her cigarette into the glass ashtray and grabbed a gun, cocking it and clicking off the safety. Lyla, Tara and Filthy whoever (it didn't matter, he was a prospect) followed Gracie. The doorbell rang again; Gracie looked out the window and saw a teenage girl, not older than sixteen with black curls and blue eyes. Gracie grabbed the doorknob, handing the gun to Tara. Tara's stomach flipped for a moment up she nodded and was ready. Gracie opened the door._

_Gemma sat on the bed, grinning. Fourteen months would be long but, she no longer feared for Jax's life. She heard the doorbell ring but, ignored it. She rested her head on the headboard and closed her eyes. Ellie burst in the door, "You better get out here," she said, Kenny nodding his head._

_Gemma carried Abel with her, handing him off to Ellie. She walked into the kitchen and saw Gracie, Tara and Lyla and one extra, "Who's this?"_

_Gracie looked up at Gemma and shook her head, took a swig of booze, held her hand up and walked away. Disappearing out the kitchen door and into the backyard. Tara pursed her lips, "Gemma," she said, "This is Dawn. Tig's daughter."_

Ellie followed me outside. She was growing up. Almost as tall as me, looked just like Opie and had been through as much. I sat on the bench under the tall tree and she sat next to me, "I can't believe it," I said, confiding in my niece, "Opie marries a porn star, don't repeat that, everyone goes to jail and Tig's kid shows up, all on the same day."

"I just want a dog," Ellie said, sighing. She still had some little girl left in her, "Lyla doesn't really like dogs. I was gonna get one but, now Dad says I can't."

"And," I chimed in, "she's too scrawny for Opie." I knew I could trust Ellie, telling her these things that wouldn't get repeated.

"What are you gonna do with Tig's kid," Gemma said, walking out into the yard, interrupting us.

"Hell if I know," I said, put my cigarette out on the ground, "I'm not even sure what Tig would do!"

"The exact same thing you're doing now, sweetheart," Gemma said, putting her hands on her hips.

"C'mon, Ellie," I said, walking inside. Gemma and Ellie followed me, my mind was made. I walked in the house and grabbed my purse and keys, "You can stay with me. I've got to get this girl a dog. Let's go, Ellie."

"She can't have a dog," Lyla said, her eyes wide.

"She can if she's living with me," I snapped, "I'll be back for the rest of my household later."

Ellie and I came back with two German Shepherds, Connor and Murphy. We walked triumphantly into Gemma's house, "Kenny, Ellie and Dawn," I said, "Get your things, we've got to get home, get these dogs situated and get dinner made."

Gemma, Lyla and Tara all sat in the living room, dumbfounded as I gathered up the kids and sent them to my Escalade, "let's go, if there's dog crap in my car," I said, sounding like my mother, "Someone is gonna lose a Wii."

Ellie hugged me, "Best. Aunt. Ever."

"Thanks, kid," I smiled, "Let's go guys. See you tomorrow, Gemma. At the garage. I'll call in some mechanics, Prospect you stay here."

I kissed Gemma, Tara and Lyla on the cheek and walked out, shutting the door behind me. Dawn sat in the front seat, looking lost and forlorn. Ellie and Kenny rolled around in the back with the puppies. I sat there for a moment, wondering what the heck I was doing, I must be losing it, "I'm Grace," I said, "Gracie. I'm Tig's… um, I'm his… girlfriend. Long term kind of thing," I couldn't think of what to call myself.

Ellie piped up, "They're facebook official."

Dawn laughed, "My dad has a facebook?"

Ellie giggled under one of the puppies, "No, but if Uncle Tig did, Aunt Gracie would be in his relationship status!"

_Gemma, Tara and Lyla sat in the living room, staring at each other, "What just happened," Tara asked as Gemma got up to watch Gracie pull out of the driveway._

_Gemma smirked, "She's handling it. She just needed to step back, evaluate and now we're here. Gracie has taken the helm girls."_

"_I don't want two dogs," Lyla said, folding her arms._

"_She doesn't care," Gemma smiled, "I wouldn't be surprised if you don't see much of Kenny and Ellie until Opie comes around."_

"_She can't take them away like that," Lyla pouted._

"_They are pretty much hers," Tara said, rubbing her belly._

"_Better get used to being underneath Gracie for awhile," Gemma said, "She's had Opie, Jax… the whole club with her since kindergarten. She's not gonna give up just yet."_

The next morning, I packed up three kids, two dogs and myself and drove to the clubhouse and garage. Filth, as I had taken to calling him helped me open up and track down some mechanics. A few guys from Nevada and ridden in overnight, Uncle Jury walked up to me and hugged me, "We're here to help."

"Right now I need protection and mechanics," I said, sifting through papers, "This is the only and I stress only income we have right now. Things are going to get tight. I'm sure the other merchandise is being handled or already has been. We still have guys on the road."

Jury looked a little surprised, like he hadn't expected a crazy haired, scarred up chick to be talking to him like that, "I'll see what I can do," he walked away and then turned around, "Who do you belong to? Where's your crow?"

"I earned mine," I said, pulling my jacket back and showing him the scar on my shoulder and lifting my shirt to reveal the one on my stomach and the top of the one below it, "Don't need a tattoo. I belong to Tig."

Finally, after organizing the office and fending off a few newspaper locals, Dawn came in and sat down. I sat at the desk across from her and started filling out repo paperwork, "So," I said, focusing on writing, "What brings you here? Child support? We don't really have the money, obviously."

"My mom is dead. So is my sister," Dawn said, staring at me.

I looked up at her, setting down my work and going to sit next to her, "I'm so sorry," I said hugging her.

She sat there, limp in my arms, unsure if she should hug me back. "Meth lab," she said, nonchalantly, "belonged to my mom's boyfriend, they were all in it when it blew. I've been living with my aunt for six months. I really don't like her."

"You can stay as long as you like," I said, "My sister died," it seemed like forever ago, "Not very long ago."

"What happened," she said.

I thought long and hard about that answer.

"Accident."


	24. Chapter 24

I was relishing time alone. A teenager (who was handling death exactly like her father, which was to ignore it and go on) two kids and two puppies filled Tig's and my house. Shoes, toys (for dogs and humans) movies, chip bags, pop cans all littered my living room. Gemma would have a cow. I had managed to bum all of them off on Gemma and Tara while I went to the store.

Slowly walking up and down the cool, fluorescent lighted aisles was like paradise. No fighting, no barking, no one (Dawn) asking me if she could "bum a smoke". I filled up my cart with food and cleaning supplies that would probably never get used, paid for it all and headed to get the kids.

I sipped an ice cold can of Coke as I walked out to my Suburban, slowing down when I saw a man leaning on the driver's side door. I set the can of pop in shopping cart seat for kids and reached my hand in my purse, feeling for my gun. The man had on a ball cap, black t-shirt and jeans. He turned his head ever so slightly and I saw scars curving up from his mouth. A squeal escaped my lips and I ran over to Chibs, my cart almost falling over. I jumped on him, hugging him, "Where the fuck have you been?" I asked, holding his face, a shit eating grin plastered on my face.

"At the cabin," he said, leaning against the car and looking around. He'd lost weight.

"Can I come up there?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Sorry girl," he said, walking to the beat up car parked next to mine, he pulled an old yellow envelope out of the passenger seat from the window, "Tiggy wanted me to give you this. I don't know what it is."

"Great," I said, butterflies in my stomach. I had no idea was what in it.

"I have to go," Chibs said, kissing my forehead, "People know how to get a hold of us if anything happens. You're safe."

"Thanks," I said, "Tell them I miss them, okay? Tell Ope that the kids are with," I swallowed those last few words and corrected myself, "They're fine."

Chibs smiled, he knew that they were with me, "Love ya, Gracie."

Chibs drove away in the car, it chugged along puffing out black smoke. I loaded the groceries and drove to Gemma's, staring at the envelope in the passenger's seat.

Ellie ran outside and came back in the Tig's surprise. She flopped it on my lap, "Open it," she said, going to sit on the floor with her brother and the dogs. Dawn, Gemma and Tara sat on the couch opposite me, Lyla in the recliner.

For all I knew, he was sending me condoms, he would. I popped open the brad and the what was once sticky part of the envelope popped up. I pulled out a stack of papers, neatly paper clipped, two stacks of money, twenty thousand and a little black bag. Gemma got up and inspected the papers, smiling, "Prison numbers, forms for conjugal visits and," her smile fell for a moment but, came back bigger, she handed the last paper to me.

"Oh no," I said, "Oh my gosh, oh fuck," I dropped the little black bag and grabbed the papers. Gemma laughed and walked into the kitchen, giggling and shaking her head.

"All you gotta do is sign is sign it, Gracie," she said from the fridge, grabbing a few beers.


	25. Chapter 25

"Its beautiful," Gemma said, inspecting the ring on my finger, "Did you turn in the papers?"

"Yeah," I grinned, "But it won't be official till Tig gets out. Even if we don't have a real wedding, I'm not having one in Stockton."

"It seems so long," Gemma sighed, holding Abel. She his bottle in front of his mouth and he took it, greedily. It was a Saturday night and we had the kids. Gemma and I would take all of them on the weekends and Tara and Lyla would take them while we were at the shop working.

"One year," I said, "One bittersweet year. We'll be okay. Dawn is here, that's something new to handle. Tara's baby on the way. The garage and the boys up North, we'll stay busy."

"You've thought this through," Gemma said, sitting at the desk.

I sat down on the bed next to Gemma. I turned to her, "Every night," I said quietly. It was true. Every night I tried to think of everything and anything except for Tig. I tried desperately to ignore the empty space beside me. Lately, I had taken to sleeping on the couch. It was easier but, it had been taking its toll on my hips and shoulder, "Ya know," I said, "sex with Tig isn't as easy to go without as I thought."

Gemma put Abel in the crib at the foot of the bed and then walked to her closet. She pulled a black box out of the corner. She grinned and pulled out a very realistic, almost too real, vibrator. I had to cover my mouth to suppress the giggles. Gemma stared at me, "Batteries last one year, ya know?"

My face was bright red, "I could never, oh gosh… Tig would never let me live it down," I stared at the flesh covered toy, "Its doesn't even measure up to Tig… its too short… and not enough girth."

Gemma's eyebrows went up, "You're kidding," she said, "Well," she chucked the thing back in the black box, "One thing I learned sweetheart, never go down in size. Ever."

"I so do not want to know," I laughed.

I brought Kenny and Ellie home; they scurried off to the basement, the dogs following them. I had finally managed to get the basement finished. Television, game console, beds, couch and the little used bookshelf finally stood in a carpeted, painted room. It was small but, it gave the kids privacy. Something I think they needed. Since Donna's death, they had grown close and I let them have time together, sometimes enforced it.

Dawn was in her room, one of the three upstairs. She was working on homework, spread out on the bed with school books and paper, "Hey," I said, leaning on the door, "Homework on a Saturday?"

"Yeah," she said, sitting up and making a space for me, "I haven't had too many invitations to go out… too many meaning none at all."

I sat next to her, "I'm sure you'll make friends soon enough. Charming is a small town and most of the time, they are a little wary of strangers. You'll make friends soon enough."

"I don't mind," she said, digging through her backpack, "This came today," she handed me her report card, smiling.

"This is amazing," I said, "Dawn, you could get into any college you wanted with these grades."

"I know," she smiled, "I'm going to take the ACT and the SAT in a few weeks, I was wondering if I could borrow some money to pay for the fees?"

"Of course, Dawn," I said, handing her back the report card, "You won't borrow it, either. Don't worry about things like that," I said, hugging her, "Get some sleep. We'll get you signed up for everything tomorrow." I stopped at the door, "Good night."

"Thanks, Gracie," she said, "Oh, have you heard from Dad at all?"

"No," I said, "He should call tonight."

"Tell him I said hi," she smiled, "I miss him."

"I will," I smiled, shutting the door behind me.

My phone buzzed around the night table and I answered, accepting the call from Stockton, "Gracie?" Tig's voice came over the line.

"Hey, Tig," I said, sinking into bed, "How are you?"

"I'm good," he said, "You? Still sore?"

"A little," I sighed, "Nothing to worry about."

"Sleep in the bed, Gracie," Tig ordered, "Its better for you."

"I know, I know," I smiled, "So bossy."

"How's Dawn," he asked, "Not giving you trouble?"

"No way," I said, excitedly, "She's been amazing with the kids, she's started her senior year here in town and she's doing great. A little socially impaired but, she takes after her father."

"Good," he said, "Coming out on Thursday?"

"Yeah," I said, I could tell he wanted to ask about the package, "I got your… proposal," silence, "I signed the papers, wearing the ring."

"Good," Tig said, nonchalantly. He sighed, I could hear the smile in his voice, "What are you wearing?"

"Oh you're sick," I laughed, "A turtleneck and corduroy pants. Wool socks."

"You're killing me," he laughed.

"Yeah, well I'm saving Bobby," I said, the operator's voice interrupted us, "I'll talk to you later, Tig. I love you."

"Love you too," Tig said, clicking the phone shut.

I slid down into the covers and pulled Tig's pillow close to me, it was always easier to sleep in our bed when I talked to him. I reached up and clicked off the light, waiting for another week to begin.

The next week, Tara and I had coinciding Doctor's appointments so; we carpooled to Saint Thomas'. We split up as we walked in, "I should be done before you," I said, "Meet you in the car?"

"Sure," Tara said, she was always so giddy for her appointments.

These checkups were really getting old. The always created a depression, only lasting a day or two but, hindering me and anyone who came near. I hated it. I so badly wanted to move past the whole baby thing but, it wouldn't… it wouldn't go. Tara and I went separate directions and I rode the elevator up to the second floor.

I rolled my eyes as I walked into the sanitized little office. I really hated this place. I always ended up in an itchy hospital gown and eventually in my bra and underwear under blinding lights with some chuckling doctor doing some unneeded ultrasound on some obviously healing hunk of scar tissue. Yeah, I'm a little bitter.

So, here I was, sprawling in my skivvies and the balding, giggly doctor running the ultrasound, "And, how has the sexual activity been, Mrs. Trager?"

Another eye roll for you, Mr. Giggles, "The last was about two and a half, three months ago. But, it had been pretty frequent once I was released." I was sure, that when Tig got out my life would be sex. Maybe a few breaks for sleep and pancakes but, pretty much sex.

"I see," the doctor said, "Well, I guess the more times you play the lottery, the better your chances of winning."

"Excuse me?" I said, sitting up.

"Pardon," the Doctor said, "Do you see that little blip on the screen there?"

"Yeah," I said, craning my neck, "Dr. Knowles said I might have to have some scar tissue taken out."

The doctor chuckled again, "No, Mrs. Trager. That's a baby. Congratulations."


	26. Chapter 26

Tara, Gemma and I were on our way to Stockton. I sat in the passenger seat next to Gemma, who drove. I fiddled with my hair in the mirror, a little nervous for my first prison visit. Dawn had elected to stay home this time but, I knew she wanted to see her dad.

I took out the pictures from the sonogram, the little white blob looked more like a squirrel than a human, "I still don't know how this happened."

"The Doctor's said you might not be able to not, never be able to," Tara said, "You're sure you weren't taking any fertility drugs? Nothing?"

I shook my head, "I guess when you have sex once, mostly twice a day… the chances go up."

"Twice a day?" Gemma and Tara said at once.

I looked from Tara to Gemma, "Don't you? I mean," I couldn't believe I was divulging this information, "Tig needs good head at least once a day which, usually leads to sex. Great… great sex."

"I've never heard of it twice a day, not even once day! Everyday?" Tara asked.

"Every day," I said.

Tara sat in the back mulling over my sex life. We pulled into the gravel parking lot of Stockton State Prison. I had butterflies, not sure why but they were there. Oh yeah, I was pregnant. I had never done this before, prison visits. Conjugal visits wouldn't be happening now, that was kind of a letdown.

We went through pat downs and bag searches. For some reason I thought I would have a "bend and cough" thing happen. I guess that was only for prisoners. We were led to the cafeteria and I saw Clay, Jax and Tig sitting at separate tables. Bobby, Juice and Happy sat at another. I nearly ran to Tig, jumping on him, he stumbled back as I kissed him.

_Tig wrapped his arms around her, kissing her. Her light, strawberry scent was welcome against the overpowering scent of sweat and lye that hung heavily in the prison. He held her and closed his eyes in her shoulder. They sat down and stared at each other for a second, Gracie's face was red, her hands shook, "Gracie what is it?" he asked, she looked over at Gemma and Tig followed her gaze. Clay and Gemma sat staring, waiting. Tara and Jax were doing the same. They were all smiling. Tig looked back to Gracie and repeated, "What is it?"_

Gemma nodded at me. I took a deep breath. It wasn't as scary as the first time, still a surprise but, now we wanted it. I took Tig's hands in mine, missing the cool metallic of his rings against his warm skin. He rubbed the ring on my finger and grinned. I looked up at him, "I'm pregnant."

Tig stared at me. I held my breath. His face was serious, "You sure?"

I sighed. He wasn't going to get excited, not yet. Hurt Tig once, shame on you. Hurt Tig twice, shame on him, "Yes," I said, "I found out at the hospital. Three months along. I have to go in once a week, at least to get ultrasounds done. But, the baby is healthy."

Tig smiled, and then laughed. His eyes were a little wet but, he was blinking it away. He hugged me and kissed my forehead, "Keep me updated," he said, weaving his fingers between mine, "Do you know what it is?" His composure was still calm, his brain was still taking it in, calculating the costs of being a pregnant. It was risky, as was any pregnancy but, we were both a bit cautious with this second round.

"Not yet," I said, "In a couple of weeks."

Tig grinned, "Six months then?" he paused and his grin fell, "I won't be there."

"Oh Tig," I said, "I'll be okay."

"Yeah," he said, "But, I'm supposed to be there," he was adorable right now, completely and utterly adorable.

"Yeah, but you're a little busy for the next few months," I said, "Besides, you'll get to skip out on all the nursery construction, the breast feeding, most of the spit up," Tig cringed, " And another upside, you won't have to clean the pool for another year."

"The brighter side," Tig said, he pulled me close to him, "I love you."

I knew our time was running out for the day, "I love you more."


	27. Chapter 27

I slipped on the jeans and tank top made especially for fat, pregnant women like me. I was so tired of elastic it was unbelievable. I threw on one of Tig's shirts and left it unbuttoned and the sleeves rolled up. I was going to pick up the boys at the cabin today. Dawn was watching Kenny, Ellie and Piper and they were at the clubhouse. Tara was on bed rest, Thomas due any day. Gemma was with her and Lyla was…. Working.

I walked past the spare bedroom that was supposed to look like a nursery but was really a crib, rocking chair bookshelf and dresser in their boxes, a few gallons of paints and painting supplies and boxes of diapers and baby clothes and toys. All pink.

I grabbed the mail as I pulled out of the driveway and tossed it on the dashboard. I drove past the garage and honked, letting them know I was on my way. Dawn had started working in the garage doing paperwork, she was brilliant at it. She was one of the smartest people I had ever met. She scored high on the SAT and the ACT. We had sent off her applications to some of the best colleges and were only waiting their response.

My ass hurt by the time I got to the cabin. I slowly slid out of the Suburban and waddled to the door, it was unlocked. Piney, Kozik, Chibs and Opie were sprawled around the television. It blared a fuzzy football game; tin foil decorated the bunny ears. I crossed my arms and stood in the middle of the room, "I know you didn't make a highly hormonal pregnant woman with swollen feet drive all the way up here to find you sleeping." By "highly hormonal" everyone was awake.

Kozik and Chibs filled up the car with their bags, Piney locked up. I stood next to Opie in the warm sunshine, "You look beautiful, Gracie," Opie said, kicking the dirt.

"Thanks," I said, "But, I don't feel like it. Two more months to go and I can't see my feet, which are killing me. My ass hurts when I sit and all I want it Chinese."

Opie laughed, "Great."

Opie drove the way home, I uncomfortably joined him in the passenger seat, "It smells like boys in here," I said about halfway home, "Shower not working at the cabin?"

Opie looked over at me, "You really want to know?"

"Not really," I said.

We got home, dropped Chibs and Piney off. Kozik and Opie went home with me. Kenny and Ellie came running out and Opie scooped them up. Kozik unloaded Opie's things into his truck. Kenny and Ellie jumped in, ready to go home. Opie walked over to me, "We need to talk about them," he said, leaning against the house, "Lyla really can take care of them."

"I know," I said, "I just… I feel like I have to. She was my sister. I don't want them to see anything with Lyla or her friends."

"Gracie," Opie said, rolling his eyes, "We're getting married for shit's sake!"

"I know," I said, "I want to take care of them."

"I know," he said, "But, now it's me and Lyla. It's our turn."

"Okay," I said, "Okay," I walked over to the truck, "Do your homework, don't give your dad trouble." Kenny and Ellie nodded, "I love you, see you soon." Opie pulled out of the driveway. Kozik was standing there, with a duffel bag looking lost, "Need a ride?"

"Not really," he said, "I haven't really had time to get a place yet, just got patched in, ya know."

"Need a place to stay," I asked, walking inside, "Come on in, I just lost two tenants."

"Ya know," Kozik said, "You don't have to, Tig not being here… I just thought it would be easier with someone around."

"Thank you," I said, "I've got just the rent for you."

"Rent?" He asked.

I walked him to the nursery, "This," I said, holding out my hands, "Make this. I can't do it… once I get down on the floor, I can't get back up. And I can't paint because I don't want a Cyclops for a baby."

"I'll get it done," Kozik said, "No problem."

I kissed Kozik on the cheek, "Thank you. Beer is in the fridge."

Thomas was born a week later. He was beautiful and strong. It had been awhile since I saw a baby born, last was Ellie. My memories had been rekindled and I was now terrified of giving birth. Luckily, the doctors thought I would have to have a cesarean section, Tara was going to do it.

We were all over at Tara's passing around Thomas when we got the phone call. No one was expecting it. We were so close to being done with all of this. Gemma answered the phone; we figured it would be Jax, calling to check on Thomas. She crumpled against the couch. Kozik picked up the phone and walked into the other room.

He came back out and handed me the phone, "Gracie," Tig's voice sounded out over the prepaid, "Do not go anywhere without Kozik or Chibs or anyone. You stay protected."

I was so confused, "What is going on?"

"I love you," Tig said, "I love you so much."

The phone clicked off and I looked up at Gemma, who was crying, "What happened?"

Kozik looked at me, and bit his lower lip, "Jax… got attacked. Shanked, he's hurt pretty bad. Lost a lot of blood. He's at the infirmary, and he's stabilized."

I sat in silence, "He's okay," I said, over and over again, "He's okay."

Kozik held his hands over my eyes and walked me to the nursery, "Ready?"

"Yeah," I giggled. He had been working on it since he moved in. Gemma and he had been sneaking in things all the time. I had been banned from that room.

He removed his hands and opened the door. My hands shot to my mouth, which was hanging open. White walls with baby pink polka dots. Everything looked beautiful. Books lined the shelves, toys in baskets, blankets, clothes. It was perfect. Kozik walked over to the wall, "Look," he said, "I thought it would cool. Turned out."

"Its beautiful, Koz," I said, he had found wooden letters and spelled out the baby's name above her crib, like Abel's. I had always loved that.

"Well," I said, "Are you ready? Last trip to Stockton with this ugly pregnant woman."

Kozik scoffed, "You are a hot pregnant woman. Not lying."

"Um," I said, "My ass is huge."

"Yeah," Kozik said, "Duh."

We walked into Stockton and security let us pass, taking me to the infirmary and Kozik to see the guys. We had a "group" visit today, just Kozik and I. Gemma was home with Tara and Thomas. Jax was sitting up in the bed, I sat on the edge next to him, holding his hand, "How is she?"

I sighed, "She's worried," I said, "Paranoid."

"Yeah," he said, "We all are. Ava coming soon?"

"Any day," I said, "She's ready. I'm ready. You should see the nursery, Kozik did a great job."

"Kozik?" Jax said, his eyebrows in the air, "How's Tig feel about that."

I rolled my eyes, "It's not like we're sleeping together, Tig would kill me. Him. Everyone."

"Yeah," Jax said, "Go see your man," he kissed me and squeezed my hand, "I love you, Gracie."

"Love you, too Jackson," I smiled, and headed for the door. That's when she came.

"_Hey man," Tig said, sitting across the table from Kozik, "Thanks for helping out with Dawn and Gracie, it… it means a lot."_

"_Yeah, well," Kozik said, looking for a snarky remark but, decided against it, "You're welcome."_

_Tig jumped up and stood in his "bring it on" stance, "Blondie," the guard yelled, "In the leather, you're girlfriend is having a baby."_

_Tig felt his knees go rubbery and he leaned against the table, Kozik took off towards the door. _

_Tig paced his cell all night, waiting for the call. He couldn't sleep, wasn't hungry. He skipped breakfast, lunch and stood next to the phones while they were in the yard. He finally called Gemma as the sky was turning orange, "Gem," he said, leaning his forehead against the payphone, "How is she?"_

_Gemma smiled, "Resting. Surgery went well, Ava is healthy and strong. We'll be out with them in two weeks."_

"_Tell Gracie to call, okay? Or Dawn," he said, "I just wanna talk to her."_

Dawn ran in the door, "Harvard," she squealed, sitting next to Ava and me on the bed. Ava stared up at me, blinking her blue eyes and smiling, a toothless grin, "I'm going to Harvard!"

"Oh my gosh, Dawn! That's wonderful!," I said, "We'll have to start planning! Ya know, your dad will be out in time for graduation."

"I know," Dawn said, "I have to call Phil."

Dawn and Filthy Phil, the prospect were friends. They were together all the time. Kind of cute. Dawn ran out the door, and I turned my attentions back to Ava, "You're big sister is going to be a lawyer." Ava's eyes slowly closed and she went to sleep.

I walked out to the kitchen with Ava and started cleaning up, Tig would be home in a month. Kozik had found an apartment a few blocks away, Dawn would be going to college in a few months. It would be Tig, Ava and me. As much as I loved Koz and Dawn, I would be glad to be a little family again.

The dogs constantly followed Ava, not me. As soon as she was down in her crib, Connor and Murphy were laying on the nursery floor. I poured their food in the giant bowls and they came trotting up for their lunch, "My good boys," I said, patting them.

Kozik came in and the dogs ignored him, as usual. He sat down at the table and I handed him a beer, "Heard about Dawn," he said, "That's pretty sweet."

"Yeah," I said, "I'm glad she can get out of here, see the world." I sat down next to Kozik, who took Ava and rocked her, "I hope Ava goes that same road."

Kozik looked at me, "You're afraid she'll be an old lady."

"I'm afraid that she'll end up like me," I said, playing with the sweat on the beer bottle, "bullet holes, husband in jail, sister dead, parents dead beats."

"None of that will happen," Kozik said, "Ever. Don't even think about it. Tig would kill me if he knew you were acting like this. You gotta let the past go, sweetheart."

I smiled, "You're right, I'm just ready for him to be home. She needs to meet her daddy." We hadn't made it to the prison; I had turned into a Gemma and was a little overprotective. I didn't want Ava to ever have to go to a prison. Ever.

The day before Tig came home, I went to the Charming graveyard. I cleaned the leaves away from Donna's headstone, wiping the dust from the letters. It was getting easier for me to go there, now that Ava was with me, my mind was focusing more on her than the things that had happened. I walked away from Donna's grave and over to the David's. His mother kept it clean and neat. David's brother's voice, Jacob, made me jump and Ava whimpered, "Hey there, Gracie," he said, "Didn't think I would see you around here."

"I haven't been for awhile," I said, rocking Ava.

"She's beautiful," Jacob said, "Could have been his, ya know."

"Yeah," I said, "could have."

"I miss him," he said, sighing and putting his hands in his pockets, "He was good for this town."

"Yeah," I said, "Charming's white knight."

"More like khaki knight," Jacob laughed.

I quickly left, feeling uncomfortable around Jacob Hale. I knew he meant well for Charming, bringing in people, boosting the economy. But, being a member of the SAMCRO family left me feeling the opposite.

"_Hey Tiggy," Clay said, patting his back, "Big day today, meeting your girl." _

_Tig gave Clay an uneasy smile and started his bike. Long time since he was on one and it felt good. His stomach twisted into knots thinking about Ava. He was terrified that she would think that Kozik was her father. That she wouldn't like him. _

_The boys pulled into Teller-Morrow and all Tig knew was that he wanted his girls. He saw Dawn standing there, smiling next to Gemma. He couldn't find Gracie or Ava. He jumped off his bike and hugged Dawn, "I missed you," he said, holding her back and looking at her, "I hear you're going to Harvard, is that true?"_

"_Yeah," Dawn said, excitedly, "Leave two weeks after graduation."_

_Tig hugged her again, "I'm so proud of you," he said, he looked around at everyone hugging and kissing, "Where's Gracie?"_

I heard the bikes pull in and snapped Ava's SAMCRO onesie on and threw the dirty diaper in the trash. The place was looking more like a daycare than a biker clubhouse. Diaper bags, wipes and baby toys littered the common area. It smelled likes babies too.

I walked out in the sunshine and saw Tig and Dawn. Dawn pointed at me and Tig practically ran. He kissed me hard and I pulled him closer by his neck, "Love the soul patch," I smiled. I looked down at Ava who was staring at Tig, "This is Ava."

Tig was silent, stoic as always. He was good at being tough but, as soon as Ava did her grin, one she inherited from her father, Tig smiled, "She looks like Donna."

"I know," I said, the boys surrounding us. Ava loved the attention and grinned and giggled. Tig put his arm around me and held Ava with the other.

"Ten minutes, in the chapel," Clay said, his arms around Gemma. We were surrounded, everyone admiring my baby girl. Tig wasn't going to let her go anytime soon. I felt bad, Tara had had a baby only a few months before and it seemed like everyone was near Ava. Gemma had to keep telling me it was because Ava was a miracle, a real blessing.

I separated from the small crowd and went to find Jax, he gave Thomas to Tara and hugged me tightly, "I missed you," he said, kissing me.

"Missed you," I replied, hugging him again. For a few days, I thought I wouldn't see him again. Jax was strong and I felt foolish for thinking that.

I waited in the bar while the guys were in church. I wasn't letting Tig out of my sight for the next twenty four hours. Maybe longer. It seemed like a short meeting, most of them ready to get laid. We said our goodbyes for the night and everyone headed home.

Following Tig was like, coming home after being away for a long time. I couldn't wait to get on the back and just cruise with him. Dawn had elected to go out to dinner with a few friends, giving Tig and I some privacy.

Tig helped me out of the car and watch carefully as I undid Ava from her car seat. He opened the door for me and followed me in, "Looks different," Tig said, standing inside the door.

"Been awhile," I said, the dogs came running around the corner and ran up to Tig, smelling him and wagging their tales. So much for watch dogs, "Here," I said, handing Ava off to him to let the dogs out. He looked a little nervous, slipping off his boots and gently walking around the room, rocking her.

I came back, "How about a tour?"

Tig shushed me, "She's asleep," he whispered.

I led Tig to the nursery and opened the door, "You first," I said, holding out my hand.

Tig looked terrified, "No, no way," he said, shaking his head.

"What?"

"Dolls, Gracie," he said, "Not going in there."

I shook my head, "Do you think I would have dolls in here? She doesn't have any kind of dolls. She does have a Glock, though. And a Bowie knife."

"You're kidding," Tig said, walking into the nursery.

"Pretty much," I said, leaning against the door as Tig put her down.

"You did a good job with her," Tig said, walking up to me, "She's perfect."

He pulled me close and kissed me, I felt my knees weakening. It had been a long time. I turned around and headed for the bedroom, throwing my shirt off before I got to the door. I could hear Tig's belt come undone behind me. Kicking off my shoes, I flopped onto the bed and let Tig work on my pants. In no time, he was on top of me, it seemed like his lips touch every inch of skin on me. He kissed my stomach and the red line of a scar from the c-section, "Pretty hot," he said, tracing it with his fingers, "Getting quite a collection going."

"Tig," I said, ignoring the caressing and kissing, my mind set on only one thing, "Just do me already? Okay?"

Tig smiled, "You got it."

Half an hour later, Tig fell, out of breath next to me. The comforter was on the floor and I pulled the sheets up, a little damp with sweat. I looked over to Tig, "A bit quicker than usual?"

"Well," he said, "It has been building up for fourteen months… I guess we'll just have to work on it."

"Practice makes perfect," I said, sliding under the covers. Though I was a little rusty, I started round two.

Tig and I went out for breakfast with Ava and Dawn the next day. Dawn talked excitedly about college, which she was leaving for in just a few days. Tig held Ava while he ate, she seemed to take to him right away, being totally calm in his arms. She watched his every move, following him with her blue eyes.

We headed back to the house, Opie's wedding was that afternoon. Thankfully, Lyla was closer to Tara than I and she hadn't asked me for help, or to be in her wedding. I was okay with that. I still didn't trust Lyla, I thought that Opie was rushing it and it would end in disaster.

While Dawn was getting ready and Ava napping, Tig and I managed to get in a quickie in the shower, which was always fun. I threw on a little black dress and some wicked heels. I was teetering on the edge of sexy as hell and hooker. But, I was going to a porn star's wedding, I'm sure there would be worse.

I slipped on the dress and noticed it was a little tighter than the last time I wore it. I turned in the mirror, Tig watched as he tightened the bolero around his neck (which I despised but he loved), "You look hot," he said, tightening his belt.

"My ass is huge," I said, staring at it.

"I dig it," Tig said, "I love it. Having a c-section was the best idea you've ever had, trust me. Everything, is still intact, ya know, down there. And, your ass is great."

"Well gee, Tig," I said, rolling my eyes, "So glad I could accommodate your tastes."

"Me too," he said, "Let's get out of here."

Dawn stayed home with Abel, Thomas and Ava, she had wanted to go to the wedding but, Tara and I paid her… well, too well, to watch the kids on our night out.

I rode with Tig. Now, that's when the outfit turned hooker. Straddling a motorcycle in a tiny dress and heels was one of the most un-classiest things I'd ever done. But, I reminded myself "porn star wedding, porn star wedding."

As they said their vows, I couldn't help but feel happy. Tig held my hand and was almost too happy to join in and say, "treat you as good as my leather and ride you as much as my Harley." I rolled my eyes.

The reception was as biker as they come. It was part wedding reception part welcome home party. Thankfully, Clay kept the business at bay for awhile and we all enjoyed ourselves. After a few shots, Tig finally got up to dance with me, placing one of his hands blatantly on my ass, "C'mon man," Jax said, shaking his head.

"This place is full of porn stars, Jax," I said, quietly across the dance floor, "They've seen worse." Jax shook his head. Then night went on from there, some people getting a little rowdier than others.

I was sitting at a table with Tara, eating some cake and watching Lyla sitting with all her porn star buds, admiring the ring and her extra tall, extra slutty shoes. I betcha can't tell I still don't like her much. Kozik came over with three shot glasses and a bottle of vodka, "Here we go ladies," he said, pouring one for both of us and him. We clinked the glasses together and downed the drink, "Let's dance," Kozik said, pulling me up. I couldn't find Tig as Koz dragged me to the floor. Kozik was definitely drunk, I wasn't sure how he was trying to dance but, it wasn't pretty.

_Jax nudged Tig and nodded toward Kozik, who was dancing with Gracie, "You okay with that?" Jax asked._

_Tig stood up and made for the dance floor, "Not really, no."_

"_Shit," Jax said, following Tig, "Here we go."_

"_I got this brother," Tig said, turning around, "Remember those counseling sessions I had to do in Stockton? I'm a changed man. I might just, break his nose instead of biting it off."_

"_Good to know," Jax said._

A few moments later, Tig was behind him. Jax and Opie were standing up and Clay was shaking his head. Tig tapped Kozik on the shoulder and he turned around. Tig jerked his head and Kozik held up his hands and walked away. Tig took his place, "He's drunk," I said.

"I know," he said, pulling me close, "I don't trust him, that's all."

"I know," I said, smiling up at him. I had Tig at my mercy, he was a little tipsy and in a good mood, I struck, "Can we have a wedding?"

"Aw shit," Tig said, "I should let Kozik dance."

"I'm serious," I said, "We should do _something… _I'd like to."

"I don't know, Gracie," he said, whining a bit, "Its so… not us."

"Yeah," I said, really playing it up I sighed, "I guess not."

"Oh fine," he said, "I'll think about it. Maybe."

"Love you," I smiled, "I'll give you a blow job out in the woods if you want."

"When do you want to pick out the dress?" Tig asked, leading me off the floor.

I was just falling asleep when Tig crawled in bed. It had been a long day. To start off, I had to take Dawn to the train station to get her to the other side of the country for school. I was panicking, mostly because she had been my second set of hands at the house, my sidekick. She had found another girl from Oakland who was heading to Harvard as well and they rode the train together. Her mom was a teary eyed as I was, "Call me at every stop okay? There should be enough money in your account for the next few months, but try not to go on outrageous shopping sprees. Call me!" She waved and boarded the train.

After that, I went to the clubhouse with Ava, which was destroyed by our lovely new Sheriff Roosevelt. We were all a little shook up, after Jax and Opie had their little run in with the Russians. But, everyone was whole and was moving past it already.

Something had happened; Tig was standing by himself, inspecting the destroyed door. Gemma took Ava and I walked over to him, grabbing hold of his arm, "Hey," I said, "You okay?"

"Yeah," Tig said, "I'm great."

"Liar," I whispered and kissed his ear.

Tara stepped into the middle of the shredded room, I didn't catch the first thing out of her mouth but, I did hear, "We're getting married!"

The atmosphere instantly turned around, everyone was happy. Except Tig, he was somber as he held Ava. I hugged Jak, "Congratulations," I said, "I'm so happy."

"Thanks, Gracie," Jax said, hugging me again. It had been a long time since Jax had done that, held me, "I'm glad you're here."

"Me too," I said, heading back to Tig who was by himself again. I left him at the clubhouse, he needed Tig time to himself.

Tig pulled me close to him and nuzzled is bristly face into my neck. His breath warmed me, smelled like cigarettes and booze. He sighed, and I knew something was up, turning over, I asked him.

He shook his head, "Clay," he said, "We're running dope now. For a cartel."

It took me a moment to comprehend, "Like, Mexican cartel? Gun toting, kidnapping and murdering cartel?"

"Yeah," Tig said, "Didn't even vote. Didn't even tell me. He's got me running bitch errands like a damn prospect, I can't even do my job anymore. He's making quick cash before his time is up," It was true, Clay's hands weren't getting worse every day, "Cartels aren't a quick deal, it's a long term thing. Getting out… I can't stop thinking about it."

"Out of the deal?"

"Out of SAMCRO," Tig said, his voice was low. The subject was hard for him.

"Bobby and I," he said, "We don't know who to follow. End up dead in a ditch or leave behind all of it." I said nothing. He continued, "If I do get out, Gracie, we won't be able to live like we do. Garage work is good money but, SAMCRO supports most of what we have. You'll have to work too."

I wasn't really sure how to respond. Both of us only knew SAMCRO. We depended on the gun runs and whatever else Tig was assigned to do. The garage was just a supplement. Tig's Reaper paycheck made it possible for me to stay home, take care of Ava and the house, for us to have the things we wanted, a full refrigerator. The house was paid for, the car paid for. We were more than comfortable. The keyword there was "we", I pulled Tig close to me, "I will go wherever you go. We will make any situation work. Whatever your decision, I will back you. Until then, I want to know everything. Everything that happens. I know that we don't do it often but, the time for disclosure, if there was ever time for it, it's now."

Tig kissed my forehead and I scooted close to him, it wasn't over. The drama, the struggle and the fear wasn't over. One battle had finished but, the war was just beginning.

Ava was having one of _those _days, cranky as they come. Ava had latched onto Tig like a leach. It was bittersweet, thankfully she hadn't become too accustomed to Kozik, which made the transition easy. But, having her close to me and me only for a few months made me a little twitchy when Tig took her out of my sight. Tig had been busy since he told me about the cartel and Clay. I knew he would be busy once they got out but, I had expected a little down time with him and Ava. Not with Clay running around playing Scarface. Not only was a frustrated with Ava's constant screaming, I was frustrated with no sex. I had been telling myself for the last fourteen months that I would be a sex fiend when Tig got out. Twice. We'd been _together _twice. We'd been sleeping together, totally exhausted since they were released. We were getting old but, fuck I needed to get some good Tig lovin' before long.

I rocked Ava as she cried, full belly, burped, clean diaper- just moody. I heard a bike pull up in the drive and thanked the Lord Tig would be able to relieve me. I went to get a beer from the fridge, when I came back in I was surprised to see Piney standing in the living room, "Hey there," I said, I handed him the beer, "How's it going?" Ava quieted down to listen to who was here.

"Not good, Gracie," Piney said, easing himself onto the couch.

I sat next to him, Ava silenced herself, sensing the stress, "Cartel move passed?"

Piney stared at me, "You knew?"

My face flushed red, "Am I not supposed to?"

Piney sat the beer on the table and took one of my hands, "Its dangerous knowledge, Gracie. Clay is… he's loosing his grip, physically and mentally. He's forgetting to work for the club and starting to work for his wallet," I wasn't sure how to respond, so Piney continued, "The vote was six, five."

"A vote like that," I said, "Club can't work so divided."

"Exactly," he said, "Tig voted yes," Piney looked at me and I came to my husband's defense.

"He voted that way because he's scared," I said, " He doesn't -," I jumped as Tig walked in the door, Piney stood.

Tig looked from me to Piney, "Hey," he said, "Something wrong?"

"No," Piney said, walking for the door, "Just catching up with my daughter." He nodded at me and walked out the door. Tig shut it behind him.

I handed Ava off to Tig before he could get his boots off and walked into the kitchen. Tig followed, "Voted on the cartel today," Tig said, sitting at the table. I pulled out the ingredient s for spaghetti, staying focused on my search for the pots and pans I needed.

"Oh," I said, I wasn't sure I was supposed to know.

"Piney told you," Tig said, staring at me. I turned and leaned against the counter, folding my arms in front of me.

"Am I that bad at keeping secrets," I said.

"Yeah," Tig replied, "I voted yes."

"Why?"

"I don't know."

I hated Clay right now. Tig's face was creased with confusion. I hated that he didn't know. I was supposed to be the one that didn't know. The tables had turned.

"Cause you love Clay," I said, getting back to the spaghetti, "You've always voted with him. Always followed him," Tig didn't respond, "I understand. We'll figure it out."

Tig nodded, "I don't want anyone to know that you know. It's too dangerous," he paused, "I've been thinking about staying at the clubhouse."

I nearly dropped the pot of water, "What?"

" Don't freak out," he said, standing up and taking Ava, who was finally asleep to her nursery. He came back a moment later.

"Don't freak out," I said, staring at him as he leaned nonchalantly on the counter, "I just got you back! And now you want to leave?"

"I don't want to leave," he said, I cut him off before he could continue.

"Sounds like ya do, Tig," I said, turning back to the stove. I was livid and felt my temperature rising.

"I want to keep you safe," Tig said, pulling my arm and turning me around, "Do you know what cartel's do? What kind of ballgame we're getting into running these drugs? These guys, they aren't like the Mayans, if we mess up with them, they kill us. If we mess up with this cartel, they kill us and then they come after Gemma, Tara, Lyla, the kids and you," he said, staring at me with such intensity it scared me, "and Ava."

My stomach flipped at the thought, tears stung my eyes, "You're not leaving," I said, grabbing his face and kissing him. He pulled me close and kissed me harder. I pulled away and ran my thumbs over the facial hair that was returning, "We are a family. We will stay a family," I kissed him again and returned to our meal that was boiling over, "You're not leaving. End of discussion." Tig pushed the boiling pot of water onto the cooler part of the stove, "Aren't you hungry?" I asked.

"Yeah, I am," he said, he pushed me over to the table with hips, kissing me.

_Thank god, _I thought. I wrapped me arms around his neck as he lifted me onto the table, scooting over the pile of newspapers, a few empty beer bottles and baby bottles. He pulled my legs up and I instantly pulled him closer with my calves. Tig kissed me but, his brains and hands focused elsewhere. He worked at my belt and I did the same, sliding my hands into his jeans and worked. His pants fell down around his ankles. He was hard as a rock and I was more than ready for it.

He reach for my pants and began to wiggle them off of me, his breathing was ragged and I was catching up. It was pure heat, pure want. Nothing romantic, just a good fuck on the way. The door flew open and Tig jumped off of me and grabbed his pants, "Oh shit," Gemma said, turning around and covering her eyes, "Don't you kids lock the doors?"

"Ah fuck," I said, tightening my belt, "Weren't expecting visitors, Gem."

"I can tell," she said, staring at the door, "You covered?"

"Yeah," Tig said, he bashfully ran his hands through his hair, "I'm gonna go get some things done at the garage." He kissed me and then walked out the door. Gemma waited for the sound of his bike to fade away.

She came up to the stove and started on my unfinished dinner, "You know about the vote?"

I rolled my eyes, "Yes, Gem."

She turned and walked up to me, "No, you don't. Got it?"

"Yeah," I said, backing away from Gemma, who was a little bit up in my business, with a slightly violent look on her face, "Okay. I got it."

Gemma walked a few feet away and then turned to look at me, her eyes were scared and the darted back and forth, "This is bad."

"Tig wants to leave, stay at the clubhouse," I said.

"And?"

"And I won't let him," I said, folding my arms. I walked over to the stove, the noodles were a bit on the mushy side now. I'd settle for a bologna sandwich.

"Good," Gemma said, "I think."

"What's going on, Gemma," I said, dumping the noodles and watching them slide down the sink. I turned on garbage disposal and they disappeared.

"Clay," she said, "He freaked out on me, Piney told me about the cartel and I called Clay on it," she sat down and tapped her finger on the table, nervously, "There's something else," she said, "I need your help."

"Of course," I said, grabbing a bottle of wine and two glasses and sitting down at the table, "What?"

"Tara," she said, taking her glass as I poured a bit of the wine into it, "She… oh shit," Gemma took a drink and then filled the glass back up, "John Teller, had another life. Another family in Belfast. Maureen Ashby, they had a daughter."

"Jax has a sister?"

"Yeah," Gemma said, "You. Anyway, Maureen sent some of John's letters home with Jax, love letters. Tara found them."

"So," I said, "Just some mushy crap, right?"

"No," Gemma said, "No, John was crazy. He was paranoid. Thinks that Clay and I had something to do with his death. Tara's got it all; she's got a police report in her office of the accident."

"Jax can't find those," I said.

"Exactly," Gemma said, sitting back, "Jax can't find those."

"I'll take care of it."

The next day, Tara came by with Thomas and Abel. I figured she had been going through the ranks, our own little Sherlock Holmes. After a few moments, she got down to it, "What do you know about John Teller?"

"What do you mean?"

"Do you remember anything around the time he died?" She asked, "Anything strange?"

"We were kids," I said, "The whole thing was strange."

"John seemed to think that Gemma and Clay had something to do with his death," she said, staring at me.

I stared back, "Tara," I said, "That's… dead history. It needs to stay that way, digging into it only leads to the trouble it caused."

"That's what everyone says," she sighed, "I just have a hard time ignoring it."

"Try harder," I said, "We all have things that eat at us, make us wonder. But, we keep it to ourselves. Get a journal Tara, leave it all unsaid."Tara nodded and said nothing more about it.

She was walking a thin line with all of this and it scared me more than it did her. That kind of split was worse than the cartel. We were up to our necks already; a civil war was the last thing we needed.


	28. Chapter 28

It had been a relatively quiet day. Relatively.

As of dinnertime, everyone had their homework done, Ava had a clean diaper, the dogs were back from the groomer and I had had the mani-pedi of a lifetime. I sat down on my end of the table and looked at my flock – Ava, Kenny, Ellie, the dogs begging and… Wendy. She sat at the other end of the table, Tig's usual spot, smiling at Ellie, "It's so nice to have a real dinner! I've been living off of frozen pot pies and T.V. dinners since I got back."

"Well, we'll get you moved in here and you can have all the dinners you want," I smiled. Yes, I know what you're thinking. I invited Wendy to stay with us. She's clean, has a good job and I could use the extra hands. Dawn was still M.I.A.

Wendy looked down and then looked back up, tears in her eyes, "You don't have to do this," she said, "Gemma, Jax… Tara… they won't like this."

I scoffed, "Between you and I, I don't care."

"What's up with that," Wendy said, "Sounds like things are on the fritz."

"Fritz is a mild description," I said, giving Ava a few more green beans, "We better talk about this-"

The front door slammed open and Tig stormed in, "Pack your shit," he said, "Hey kids, Wendy. Wendy?"

"Hiya Tig," she smiled, staring at him. Tig shook his head as if to say, "whatever".

"Why are we packing," I asked, standing up. The dark patch of leather on Tig's cut caught my eye, "Where's your Sergeant patch?"

Tig rubbed his eyes, "Just pack your stuff, we're going to a hotel… we'll call it a vacation."

Kenny and Ellie jumped up, food and plates knocking and spilling, they yelled, "Alright, no school tomorrow!" Ava began to cry with all the commotion.

I threw my hands in the air, "EVERYBODY TIME OUT!" The room fell silent, even Ava looked up at me with watery eyes, "Kids," I said, calmly, "Go downstairs, take the dogs." Wide-eyed, they silently went downstairs. Wendy took Ava into the nursery and shut the door. I turned to Tig, "What the hell is going on?"

"Don't worry about it," Tig said, "Just get everyone together."

"I'm gonna worry about it," I said, I was getting sick of this conversation, "Where is your patch?"

"I don't want to Charming's Sergeant anymore," Tig said, he struggled with the words.

"What about Clay?"

"I DON'T CARE ABOUT CLAY," Tig bellowed.

"Bullshit, Tig," I said, shaking my head.

"We just need to get away from SAMCRO," Tig said, his eyes closed.

I sneered at Tig, I could feel my temper rising, "Get away," I said, my voice low, "You think we can just _get away _from SAMCRO? After all the shit we've been through?"

"Gracie," Tig said, speaking like I should know this plain as day, "I can't work for SOA when I'm worried about you and me and Ava and the kids all day! C'mon! Let's just go and we'll talk about this when we get to Tacoma."

Tacoma. This decision was because of Kozik.

"I don't want to go to Tacoma," I screeched, slamming my glass of water on the floor. It shattered, "I want to stay here. I want you to not worry about me! Just do your job and be my husband!"

"Ya know what," Tig said, pointing at me, "Forget it. I'll go, by myself. If you want to stay and get busted up then so be it."

"Fine," I said, "Go, we don't need you," Tig looked at me for a second, opened his mouth to say something, shook his head and stormed back out the door. His biked roared down the road. I sat down at the table and Wendy poked her head out, "Come on out," I said, holding my head up with one arm.

"Everything okay," Wendy said, holding Ava.

"Not really," I said, wiping tears off of my face, "Can you watch the kids? I need to find him. Ava should be asleep soon," I said, looking at the clock, "Kenny and Ellie are on their own until nine o'clock."

Wendy said, "You want me to stay here, alone?"

I looked around, "Yeah?"

"Oh," she said, surprised, "I guess… sure."

I stood up, grabbed my keys, purse and spare bag of clothes I kept in the coat closet, "I'll let you know if I don't plan on coming home, okay? Help yourself to anything in the fridge," I walked out the door before Wendy could reply.

I knew I was asking for trouble going after him but, this was a major life changing decision. At this point, he couldn't go around making those cause he was feeling pissy.

I pulled into the garage, didn't see his bike but, walked in anyway. It was eerily silent, I poked my head in the door to the garage, Opie was in there, "You seen Tig?"

Opie slowly looked up, "No. Everything okay?"

"Just had a little fight, no biggie," I said, carefully.

Opie nodded and went back to work. I walked back into the hallway, "Anybody around?"

"Me," I heard Clay's voice and walked into the room he was in, he sat on the bed.

"Know where Tig went too," I asked again.

"Nope."

I flopped down on the bed next to him, "Ya know, he really needs you around."

"Don't even start," Clay snapped.

"Oh you, too," I shot back, standing up, "I'm about sick of all of you treating me like shit. I'm not some old lady you can just push around."

Clay jumped up and pushed me, "YES. YOU ARE."

I stumbled backwards and tried to process what just happened, I jumped on Clay and pushed him back, "NO! I'M NOT!"

His eyes widened and he came at me, his big, crippled hands showed me how much strength they had as they wrapped around my neck, I choked out a, "help!" before they closed in. I hands pounded on his face and clawed at his fingers, "You are an old lady," he said through gritted teeth, "You cook, clean and suck dick or you get shot. You got that? I don't care who you love or who you fuck, you are a WOMAN in this club."

He backhanded me and I felt my cheek open and hot blood run down my face. He let me go and I fell to the ground, coughing as I reclaimed my breath, "Fuck you, Clay."

"Get out," he said, sitting on the bed again and rubbing his hands.

I stood up, gathered my things and turned around at the door, "Disappointment can't even begin to describe what I'm feeling right now."

Clay ignored me and I walked into the kitchen, dumped my things and filled a rag full of ice and placed it on my cheek. It hurt like hell. Opie walked in and saw me standing there, "Holy shit," he said, "What the hell?"

"Cat fight," I said, faking a smile, "Gonna be one less croweater around."

Opie shrugged, "You gotta stop beating up girls that come onto Tig."

Tig was right, I thought as Opie inspected my face. I felt tears brewing – why didn't I just leave with him?

"I'm gonna go get Piney," Opie said, hugging me and kissing my head, "Go home, get some rest… I have a feeling Tig will come around."

I nodded and carefully wiped the tears off of my face. Opie gave me a reassuring squeeze, "Come by more often, will you?"

He nodded, I knew he wouldn't. His kids scared him. He scared his kids. I drove home and quietly walked inside. The lights were out except a little one in the living room, Wendy was watching television, "Hey," she said, "Oh my gosh. What happened? Did Tig do this?"

I broke down and cried, "No," I said, sobbing. She jumped up and walked me to the couch.

"Who?"

I looked at her, "Clay."

"Gracie, we have to tell-"

I panicked, "No, oh no… we can't tell. I told Opie that I got into a fight with another girl. Okay? We cannot tell anyone. Okay, Wendy?"

She looked at me for a long moment, "Okay."

Tig didn't come home that night. I lay in bed by myself, crying. My face hurt, my body hurt and I'll be damned if my feelings didn't get hurt. My bed felt incredibly empty and cold. Tig and I rarely fought; if ever and if we did… he never left. I was so used to banishing my to the couch. I would give anything to have him on the couch.

I turned over and reached for my cell phone again, dialed Tig's number and let it ring in my ear, "What?" his voice snapped over the phone. I started crying, "Gracie, what?"

"Please come home," I wept, "I need you."

"I don't think it's a good idea," Tig said, "Maybe we need to cool down and think about this, our future."

"Tig please," I said, "You know our future. It's you and me, right?"

"I think it's safer if it's just me," Tig said, quietly.

"You're not doing this," I said, there was no stopping the tears the now, "You come back right now."

"No, not yet."

Tig ended the phone call and I sat there, dumbfounded, "What?" I said aloud. This was not happening. Not to me. Not to Tig. Not to us. We were the ones who made it and now, we weren't making it. What went wrong?

I didn't sleep that night. The sun came up and I rolled out of bed – my face pounded. I inspected my black and blue cheek, the cut probably could have used stitches – oh well. I shuffled out to the kitchen and made coffee, sitting at the table and staring aimlessly out of the window. The smell of coffee roused Wendy and she came out, too.

_Gracie looked awful. Her eyes were red and her face was wet with tears, the little pronged band-aid was barely holding the gash together. She was pale, amongst the bruising, had dark circles under her eyes, "Tig's not coming back," she said as Wendy sat down._

"_Oh, I'm sure he will," Wendy gave her arm a reassuring squeeze._

_Gracie swallowed down a sob and Wendy saw the red-purple finger prints on her neck. Gracie turned to her slowly, "He won't."_

_Gracie's phone buzzed around the table, she gradually reached over and picked it up, "Hello? … I'm at home… having a bad morning… what's there, Ope? … I guess I'll be there in a few," she hung up the phone and looked up, "I gotta go meet Ope and Jax, can I leave the kids with you? I'm gonna go see Tara and Piney after, I haven't seen him in awhile and then probably over to see Tara."_

"_Sure," Wendy smiled, "That's fine."_

_Jax's bike was already there as she pulled in. The heat was horrible, Gracie was sweating and took off her shirt and left the tank top on underneath it. She pulled her hair back and tied it back in a messy bun. _

_She walked in and was greeted by even more heat oozing from the incinerator. Jax and Opie stood and looked at her, "What's going on?" Gracie saw Piney's cut in Opie's hands and looked in the incinerator, "Oh no," she said, shaking her head, "Oh please not him. Oh not Piney." Unser came in the door behind her and gave Jax and Opie the "really? Right now?" look._

_Her knees buckled and she slid to the floor, "Opie," Jax said, "Who did this?"_

_Opie pulled Gracie up as she cried. It wasn't loud, just… painful. Opie stared hard at Jax, "Clay."_

_Gracie pulled away from Opie and looked at Jax. Jax shook his head, "No, Opie."_

"_He did this, Jax," Opie said, tears in his eyes._

"_Clay did not kill Piney," Jax bellowed. Unser bowed his head and slipped out._

"_I'm going to kill Clay," Opie said, "He killed my wife. He killed my father. Who's next? Gracie? My kids?"_

Jax walked out. Opie turned to me, "I am so sorry, Gracie," he said, he put Piney's cut in my hand, "I am so sorry. I love you," he gently took my face in his hands and kissed me. He kissed me hard on the lips, I stood there as Opie kissed me like Tig did, like David did. And I did nothing. He pulled away and looked me right in the eyes, "I love you." He said it with conviction and I believed him.

_Gemma found Gracie sitting on the floor, staring at the incinerator, holding Piney's cut, "Oh baby girl," Gemma said, kneeling down to see her, her face was black and blue and her makeup and run and made it worse, "Let's go."_

"_Tig is gone," Gracie said, "He left."_

"_He's here," Gemma said, "He's with the guys, at the clubhouse."_

"_He's not coming home," I cried, "Piney isn't coming home."_

"_Where is Opie?"_

"_He's going to find Clay."_


	29. Chapter 29

_Opie watched. _

_He always watched. Opie always watched her._

_Gracie had on a tiny – too tiny – hot pink dress. Her hair was extra big, holding an unknown amount of hairspray. And her hands… her hands were around David Hale's neck as they slow danced. Opie's stomach turned (again) as he remembered how Gracie had confided in him that she and David would be sleeping together – for the first time – that night. _

"_Ope," Donna said, her hands holding onto his own neck, "Opie, hello? Earth to Opie! I'm your girlfriend remember?"_

_Opie focused his attention back to Gracie's sister, Donna. Opie had been "making do" with Donna for a few months now. She was the closest thing Opie could get to Gracie – Donna was falling miserably short._

_Jax watched Opie from the punchbowl, shook his head and resumed pouring booze into the red, fruity drink. It was painfully obvious that Opie was infatuated with Gracie. The way he watched her, spoke to her, spoke about her. His eyes flashed when she said his name. Jax, although he felt sorry for Opie, made him promise not to break Gracie and David. As far as Jax was concerned, David was a good thing for Gracie. Although he knew that Gracie wouldn't end up a croweater or a sweet butt, he figured David could provide for her a good, safe life outside the club. She needed that. Opie, unfortunately was already as deep into SAMCRO as Jax was._

…

_Opie cried._

_Donna's blood was still on his cut, he could smell the metallic tinge still. The kids slept behind him, silently. He would tell them in the morning._

_He tried desperately to calm himself but he continued to sob. Harder and harder he cried, his shoulders shaking. Finally, he forced himself to leave the room before he woke the kids._

_He cried for Donna, of course he did. He kept telling himself that, _I'm crying for Donna, okay!

_But, in all reality – he cried with sick relief. All those years of regretting that he hadn't made Gracie his came to a screeching halt – they turned into disgusting, sweet relief. That could have been Gracie. Could have been Gracie's brains all over the dashboard. __**Gracie's **__kids – now motherless – sleeping in __**Gracie's **__bed. __**Gracie's **__clothes in the hamper, __**Gracie's **__dishes in the sink, __**Gracie's **__blood on his clothes. __**Gracie. Gracie. Gracie. Gracie.**_

_Opie slammed his fists against his temples. He cried harder because it wasn't Gracie._

…

_She was so beautiful. Beautiful even with the tubes full of blood, medicine, pain killers and air going in and out of her, she was beautiful. She was pale white – the dark circles under her eyes looked like bruises. Blood oozed through the gauze on her shoulder. Her hair was still halfway styled from Half Sack's wake. Jax's hand made Opie jump, "We gotta go," Jax said, "She'll be aight, brother – Ireland is waiting."_

_Opie nodded. Jax walked over to Gracie and kissed her. Opie waited patiently for him to leave. Then, he walked up to her and kissed her hair – it smelled like hairspray and the last remaining whiffs of her strawberry shampoo. The closeness of the moment struck a chord in him and he knelt down to look at her, "I don't think you can hear me, you're pretty loaded up on morphine," he held her hand, it was dwarfed by his, "I want you to know that I can never, ever thank you enough for taking care of Kenny and Ellie. You're my best friend – I love you," Opie stood up, "I love you more than you'll ever know."_

…

"_YOU DID WHAT," Opie bellowed, coming at Tig._

"_It was just the Mexican help, Ope," Tig said, throwing his hands in the air, "Just a quick bang!"_

_Opie was a big guy. He slammed Tig against the wall – the impact making Tig's gunshot wound throb and sting, "You don't do that! You have Gracie," Opie said through a clenched jaw. Tig felt the guilt leech into him, "You have _her."

…

_Opie could still taste Gracie on his lips as he sped to the clubhouse… to Clay. If he was going to die tonight, he would die knowing that he told Gracie that he loved her. He felt closure in knowing that she knew. His father, his mother, Donna, Lyla, the kids - they would have been proud. He was proud. Because he had finally said it, finally showed it. He exhaled in a half laughing, half crying noise. He loved her._


	30. Chapter 30

**_Sorry this chapter is so short... I'm trying to figure out where the feck to go with this... SOA-writer's block, I think. To be frank, I was disappointed with the finale, I've heard a few people are... work with me here and enjoy :)_**

I laid Piney's cut, wrapped in tissue paper in the wooden box and put it up in the highest shelf of my closet. It seemed like I had stopped crying but, the tears had been constantly pouring from my eyes. I went into the bathroom, connected to the bedroom and wiped the makeup from under my eyes – I winced when I pressed against the cut too hard. I stared at it, wondering if I had a broken bone in there or if I maybe should take a trip to the hospital.

I walked back out and jumped when I saw Jax leaning in the doorway of the bedroom, "Holy shit, Jackson," I said, walking over to the pile of dirty clothes and beginning to fold them.

"Heard Wendy was staying with you," he said, staying at his spot – trapping me in my own room. Bastard.

"Yeah," I said, focusing on the laundry.

"What's up with that?"

"She needed somewhere to stay," I said, getting irritated, "She's clean, Jackson. In one night she's helped me so much. I just need a friend."

"What am I," he said, walking up to me. I still stared down at the clothes.

"You've got your own family, Jax," I said, turning to him, "Your own problems. I doubt you wanna hear my pity story."

Jax stared at my face for a long time, "Tig do this?"

"Oh God no," I said, shaking my, "C'mon Jax, really?"

"Who?"

I debated. I figured Clay already being shot and in the hospital wouldn't make a difference now, "Clay," I said as Jax squished his lips together like he did whenever he got mad, "Don't make a big deal out of this okay? I stepped out of line."

"Big deal?"

"Yeah, Jackson," I snapped, "Not. A. Big. Deal."

The front door opened and closed and Tig walked in, jerking his chin up at us, "You want a beer, man?"

"Nah, I'm leaving," Jax said, as Tig walked to the kitchen.

"Do not tell him," I said, through gritted teeth, "I will kill you."

Jax nodded, kissed my forehead and left. Tig entered the bedroom but walked straight into the bathroom and slammed the door, still obviously pissed. A few moments later he walked back out, "You gonna say anything, Tig," I said, standing with one hand on my hip and a basket full of Ava's clothes on the other.

"I don't know what the hell you wan-," Tig snapped and turned to me, "What the hell happened to you?"

"Got into a little fight," I said, pushing past him into Ava's room, "The chick you banged last night," I said, talking in a whisper.

"That is a trick question, Gracie," Tig said, whispering next to me, "I didn't sleep with anyone last night."

"Could have fooled me," I said, tossing the laundry basket towards the washer and dryer and walked to the kitchen. Thankfully, Wendy had taken the kids out again and I had only a little dinner mess to clean up.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean," he asked, holding his arms out.

"It means, we haven't had sex in so long I'm beginning to wonder if you're not out with someone else," I yelled, tossing the pots and pans from the stove into the sink with a crash. Okay, so it was a little dramatic. We'd only had sex twice in two weeks since he'd gotten out – during the same day. I was beginning to get a little frazzled, "Its driving me nuts, Tig."

A loud crash made me spin around, Tig was pushing everything of off the table with one arm, "C'mere," he ordered.

I walked over to him, "What the HELL do you think you're doing? Who is gonna clean up that –,"

Tig's mouth fell hard on mine, stopping my words. He tossed his beer bottle on the pile of plates and leftovers, it crashed and shattered, "Fuck you, Tig," I said, wrapping my arms around his neck as he lifted me onto the table and working on my pants. I reached down and already felt him bulging – we were both overdue for this appointment. His belt came off; his pants practically undid themselves and fell to his ankles. I wrapped my legs around him as he didn't waste any time entering me. I quickly lost my breath and had to balance myself with one hand on the table and the other clinging to Tig, "Oh shit," I said, realizing the end was coming too quickly as Tig pumped in and out of me, hard and fast, "Oh its gonna be a quickie," I shouted, breathlessly.

"I think…. So… too," Tig said, into my shoulder. He finished with something that sounded like a "buuuuhhh" at the same time I did. We both collapsed, Tig on top of me, onto the kitchen table.

"I hope no one ever finds out we just banged here," I said, catching my breath.

"I don't even care," Tig said, kissing my neck and biting my ear.

"If you keep that up," I said, a hitch in my breath as he continued with his lips, "We'll be heading for round two."

Tig lifted me up and carried me to the bedroom, knocking the neatly folded clothes off of the bed, he laughed when I slugged him, "Round two?"

I sighed a very happy sigh, "Yes, please."


	31. Chapter 31

Tig was sleeping soundly when I woke up the next morning. Needless to say, he fucked the much needed shit out of me. We did it on the table, the bed, the wall, the bed again and when Wendy and the kids got home we quietly did it in the shower… and the bed again. Two weeks of pent of frustration – gone.

I went about my morning with a smirk on my face, cleaning up the mess on the floor, putting some cinnamon rolls in the oven… I felt good. The house started to wake up slowly, I reveled in the silence of my morning after. Tig came out first in his pajama pants, while I did dishes in the sink, putting his hands on my things and kissing my neck, "Good morning," I said, giggling.

"It is a good morning, isn't it," Tig said, pouring himself a cup of coffee and sitting at the table with a newspaper, "Where's Wendy?"

"Work," I said, sitting on his lap, "You going to the hospital today?"

"Not till later," Tig said, "Why?"

"I was gonna go see Clay, you wouldn't mind watching the kids for a couple of hours, would you," I asked, kissing him – sucking up.

"Oh, c'mon," he said, "I don't wanna be a babysitter."

"Tig," I said, "Two hours, tops. If you play it right, Ava will have a clean diaper the whole time," Tig shuddered, "You are such a baby."

"Two hours," Tig said, finalizing the deal, "No baby shit."

"Deal," I said, standing up as Kenny and Ellie walked in, sleep in their eyes and hair a mess, "Good morning, babies," I smiled, putting a glass of milk and a plate of cinnamon rolls in front of them.

Mumbles that sounded like good morning's came from the kids, I assumed that Wendy had run them hard the night before, I was grateful for that, "Aunt Gracie," Ellie said, "Wednesday is the Christmas recital, I don't have anything to wear."

"Maybe, Uncle Tig can take you to the mall today," I said, patting Tig's shoulder.

Tig panicked, "That's Aunt Gracie's job," he said, shaking his head and focusing on the paper in front of him.

"Fine," I said, "But, we will ALL be going to the recital," I ordered, "No exceptions."

Tig and Kenny grumbled, "Hey, no exceptions," Ellie said, copying me.

Tig held up his hands and laughed, "Okay, okay! Don't get bossy!"

My phone buzzed around on the table, it read Jax across the front of it, "Hello," I answered, walking into the living room.

"Get to the clubhouse," he snapped at me, "Now. Don't bring Tig."

"Okay," I said, he ended the call before I could reply, "I'm gonna get ready and head into St. Thomas, you got these kids? Ava will be awake in a while."

"Sure," Tig said, nonchalantly.

Kenny turned around, "When is Grampa coming back?"

Piney. I felt my breath catch in my throat, Tig looked up and he noticed my instant distress. Tig jumped up and walked behind me to the bathroom, "What's up with Piney," he asked with a sigh.

"Nothing," I said, slapping some makeup on my face.

_Something was up, Tig thought staring at his wife putting makeup on in the mirror. She took her shirt off and leaned forward, examining her beautiful scars and rubbing lotion on her torso and arms, he would take her right there if the kids weren't in the kitchen. He was tired from last night but, he could go a few more times before he really needed a break._

"_What'd Jax want," he asked, "Oh, he just wants me to stop by the clubhouse before I go to Saint Thomas, has some of the kids things."_

"_Oh," Tig said, eyeing her, he knew she wasn't telling the whole truth, he could see it in her eyes. The way she turned her body from him. Tig nodded as she pushed past him to get ready, tears brimming in her eyes, her lipped quivered slightly, "Gracie, what's wrong with you," Tig said as she undressed and pulled jeans and a black shirt on, "I'm not stupid."_

"_I'm just," she paused, thinking, "A little stressed with Clay and everything… you know? I'll be back soon," She walked up to him, kissed him on the lips and smiled weakly. She patted his cheek, "I love you," She quickly walked out, kissing Kenny and Ellie on their heads, "Behave for your Uncle," she said, slipping on her tall boots that Tig loved._

"_Tell Grampa we love him," Ellie shouted with a mouth full of cinnamon roll._

_Gracie turned from opening the door, "He knows, baby girl, he knows."_

I was thankful for the drive to the clubhouse: peace and quiet. I honked the horn and the Prospects opened the gate, we had been on lockdown since Clay had been shot. I pulled in slowly, scanning the lot to see who's cars and bikes were there and who wasn't. Tara, Jax and Gemma stood out front, Jax said something to them and they sulked inside, the door closing behind them. I got out of the car, took a deep breath and walked over to Jax, who hugged me, "How are you," he asked, sitting down at the picnic table, I chose to stand.

"I'm fine, what's this about, Jackson," I said, standing in front of him.

"Clay killed my father," he said, staring at me, waiting for a reaction.

I wasn't really sure I had heard correctly, "JT? Clay killed John Teller? No, Jackson, JT was in an accident. Our Clay?"

"No," Jax said, "Clay Morrow killed my father."

"How do you know," I asked, feeling light headed, please Lord – do not let me pass out here again.

"My mom," he said, "Tara. They found letters, diary entries. Gemma knows."

I stepped back, away from Jax, holding up my hands, "I don't want to know when its going to happen or where its going to happen or even how its going to fucking happen, you got that?" Jax nodded and I turned around, going back to my car. I felt sick to my stomach, screeching out of the parking lot. Gemma and Jax assaulted my phone with texts and calls and I chucked the phone into the backseat – it landed in a pile of toys, books, baby junk and backpacks. I am such a mom.

Thankfully, Saint Thomas was quiet – quiet as in, I didn't know anyone. Of course, with my bashed up face and biker woman repertoire, everyone seemed to know me. I slowly and peacefully made it to Clay's room, Phil the Prospect sat in a chair outside. I nodded to him but, silently entered otherwise. Clay was sleeping, the television was quietly on.

I pulled up a chair next to him and took his giant, swollen hand in mine. It was red and radiated heat, I wondered if the nurses were treating his arthritis too, I made the mental note check with them when I left. I sat there in silence, looking at him – the king of SAMCRO brought down to a wheezing, wounded man.

He stirred and squeezed my hand, "Hey Gem," he said, quietly.

His eyes widened when he saw that it wasn't his wife, it would never be is wife again. Clay looked away, shame and embarrassment in his eyes, he wouldn't apologize and I didn't expect him to. I started, "I know that it wasn't my place," I said, my voice already unsteady, "To speak to you like that, I know that a lot of women aren't treated the same as I am in this world, and I got used to it."

Clay's hand gently squeezed mine, "You didn't deserve what happened, Gracie."

I nodded and wiped the overflowing tears out of my eyes, "You killed Piney," I said, "He knew about John Teller, didn't he," I asked, as it all came together in my head, the truth crashing on me like waves. Clay looked away, "He knew too much, didn't he."

"Gracie," he said, "Don't… don't go there."

"I can't not go there, Clay," I said, lips quivering, "You've taken two of the people I love the most from me, I have the right to know," I was replied to with silence, stubborn ass Clay. I stood up and kissed his hand, then leaned down and kissed his cheek, "I'm sorry, for what's about to happen."

"What's about to happen," Clay asked as I walked to the door, "Gracie, what's about to happen?"

I turned with my hand on the door, "Jackson knows that you killed his father."


	32. Chapter 32

Tig and I sat in one of them many metal, folding chairs in the Charming Middle School gymnasium. Ava was asleep, her head on Tig's shoulder. I held one of his hands in both of my. It was good to have him a neutral environment, although he was anything but relaxed. Unfortunately, Ellie had to have her face painted like a Raggedy Ann doll and Tig could barely even look at her. Kenny and Ellie got a real kick out creeping up behind me and tapping his back but, I had to put an end to it – I was afraid Ellie would get punched in the face. I _really _didn't need to explain that to the emergency room.

As Ellie's class marched up on the stage, all of them smiles and giggles at each other's face paint, Opie sat down in the empty chair next to me, "Hey" I said, as he kissed my cheek. He smiled and I took one of his hands, feeling Tig hold mine tighter at the change.

After the show, cookies and punch were passed around and everyone was letting the kids run off their adrenaline and the sugar. Tig kissed me, "I gotta go," he said, eyeing the thirty-something kids dressed up as dolls running around.

"We'll be home soon," I said, kissing him back. Opie stayed with me awhile longer. Standing next to me in silence, "You gonna come by tonight, Opie," I asked, holding Ava, "Kids miss you, ya know."

Opie looked at the ground, "Wendy still there?"

"Yeah," I said, "But she works a lot. You could sleep on the hide-a-bed downstairs with the kids, we have room for you," I said, in a "duh, you should already be here" tone.

Opie nodded.

Later that night, I put Kenny, Ellie and Opie together on putting the Christmas tree up together. I handed Opie a plastic tub full of mismatched ornaments, "Have a go," I said, "I'm gonna go put Ava down."

Opie nodded and opened the box, the kids jumped into it. Wendy walked in the door, "Hey guys," she smiled, "Opie, how are you?"

I left Opie, Wendy and the kids alone, focusing on Ava. She was getting so big. Poor thing had an afro already, although her hair was the color of Donna's – not black like Tig's or mine. She wasn't fussy like Kenny and Ellie had been. She always seemed like she was attached to me but then Tig would walk in the door and she would get those big doe eyes and wrap him around his finger – when he did show up. My phone buzzed in my pocket as I laid Ava down in her crib, she stretched but quickly fell asleep again.

Tara had sent me a text message, I flipped open my phone: _Clubhouse. _Thank you Tara, that was descriptive. She had been so damn weird these last couple of days. I walked into my bathroom, spruced up a little, pulled down my shirt – a little rough and tumble cleavage always scared the croweaters away.

"I'm gonna go out with Tig for a bit," I said, kissing Kenny and Ellie on top of the head, "I expect this house to look like the North Pole when I get back, "Okay?"

"Aye aye," Kenny and Ellie said – too much Spongebob.

"Beer is in the fridge, bottle of vodka in the freezer, everything else on top of the fridge," I said, grabbing my purse and jacket, I caught the look Opie and Wendy gave each other, "Tig… dolls… Christmas pageants, you know… he stocked up."

I drove to the Clubhouse, Prospect let me in. I rolled the window down and he walked over, "Something big happen?"

"Beats me," he said looking at the dimly lit clubhouse, "Not too many people in there to be honest. I have no idea what's going on."

I nodded, "Great."

I pulled forward, locked the car doors and walked towards the clubhouse. It was dark when I entered, only a few lights were on. I saw Tara open up the doors to the church room and panicked, "Tara, what the hell?"

Gemma saw me and jerked her head towards the door; she was walking in there too. Um, okay? Last time I checked that would get you smacked. I looked around for anyone out here, saw a patch on the corner of the bar. I picked it up, _President. _So it happened. I figured Clay wasn't dead, his cut would have been here if he was. It wouldn't be so quiet if Clay was dead. I picked up the patch and walked up next to Gemma. Chibs was in Tig's seat; Tig in Chibs. I held onto the patch and looked up at Jax with Tara behind him. They both looked scary as hell.

I saw the back of Tig, his shoulders were high – tensed, he was chewing on his thumb nail and his shoe was jumping up and down. I went to move toward him but, Gemma caught my arm and yanked me back. Tig turned around and caught my eye and held out his hand, I took it and stood next to him, I tossed the President patch down the table and it landed short of Jax.

_Gemma watched as the new reign of SAMCRO took hold. Gracie tossed the patch to Jackson had he nodded at her, she nodded back. Tara behind the King, Gracie behind the knights, as always. Gemma watched as Tig ran a hand down the back of Gracie's legs and felt a pang of jealousy. Gemma turned around and left, going home for the night._

I took Jax's hint, bent down and kissed Tig hard, "Come home tonight," I whispered and walked out, waiting for Tara, we closed the doors.

I pulled Tara close, "That was very brave," I said, squeezing her. She walked to the bar, I could see her hands shaking, "You know what this means, right?" I said, wondering if she fully realized what she just jumped head first into.

"Yeah," she said, opening a bottle of booze and taking a swig, "Gemma and Clay… they need to go."

Okay, I guess she got it pretty well.

Back home, the tree was up and was pretty damn gaudy. Ava was sound asleep still, the dogs were downstairs with Kenny and Ellie, sleeping too. I walked back to my room, heard quiet laughing in Wendy's room and peaked in the door, "Were the kids okay, Wendy? OH MY GOD!" Opie riding Wendy as hard as I'd seen anyone do it, he jumped off of her and knocked the two empty bottles of beer and the bottle of vodka off of the nights stand. I covered my eyes and turned around, "What the hell are you guys doing?"

"Um… sex," Opie said, laughing. He was obviously drunk… Opie never got drunk.

"Alright then," I said, turning around, "I'll be outside, smoking a cigarette. Trying to get these images out of my head." I didn't even bother telling him that the guys were at church. I closed the door behind me, grabbed a bottle of wine, a glass and my secret carton of cigarettes and lighter and went out on the back patio.

Two cigarettes and a glass of cab later, Tig slid open the door and fell into the chair next to me. I didn't say anything, just slid the bottle and smokes over to him. He took both willingly, "Thought you quit the smokes," he said, lighting the one between his lips.

"I did," I said, staring at the pool, "Except on nights like these."

Tig nodded, "Ope here?"

I smirked and rubbed my temple, "Oh yes, so is Wendy."

"What's with the tone," Tig asked, "Oh.. time out… did they bang?"

"They're banging right now, Tigger," I said, smiling at him.

"What happens at the Trager household stays at the Trager household," Tig said, taking a few chugs of the wine.

We sat like that for awhile, silent. Smoking a drinking; like Opie, Jax and I used to do in secret on the roof of the clubhouse. I felt my cheeks getting warmer from the drinking. Tig was chewing on his thumb again, "I think Jax will be okay, Tig," I said, playing with the frayed hole on my jeans, "He's… he's been enlightened, I suppose."

"What the fuck does that mean," Tig asked, his voice oozed annoyance.

"I… I'm not sure I'm the one to tell you," I said, suddenly regretting hinting at anything, "Maybe that's something for Jackson to tell you, or Clay."

"Clay is pretty much fucking dead to the club, Gracie," Tig stood up, flicked his cigarette out and walked inside.

I sighed and followed him; I don't know why I expected peace anymore. Tig was undressing and the shower was already on. He pulled the glass door open and stepped inside. I saw his shoulders shudder and realized he was crying. I stepped inside, shut the bathroom door and undressed. I stepped inside, Tig had his arms up on the walls; I wrapped mine around him and felt his body move while he cried. I kissed his back, the hot water ran over both of us. Tig's wrapped his fingers around mine. It was reassuring, as being with Tig always was. But, something about knowing that Tig wouldn't be jumping in front of anymore bullets for Tig, that the tension of Jax ascending to the President's was dissipating, Gemma's hold over Jackson and Tara was over. I even felt happy that Opie was getting some, even if it was with Wendy. I smiled against Tig's back and he turned around and looked down at me, "What?"

"I'm happy," I said, pulling his face down to mine, "Things are going to be better, Tig. You might not see it now but, I do."

Tig nodded, "Only you can see the light in shit like this."

Tig's hands began to wander, his lips found mine. It felt like any other night at home, but as Tig pounded into me I felt the world changing, Charming was changing, SAMCRO was changing. I stood still.


	33. Chapter 33

It was quiet.

Our home was quiet. The clubhouse was quiet. Charming was quiet. There were no cars out, no people anywhere. Tig and I flew through Charming on his bike, the loud rumble echoed off the buildings of downtown. We were going out for the weekend, headed to the valley so I could spend money and Tig could get away from the chaos of change.

Opie had left early, leaving before that awkward morning after could happen. Wendy had volunteered to watch the kids for the day or two we would be gone. I had stocked up on Lunchables, juice boxes and prepackaged snacks to Wendy wouldn't have to work too hard with Kenny and Ellie. Neeta would come over every morning and night to check on them. Even though Neeta had stopped working on a regular basis for Jax and Tara she was still very much a part of our children's lives.

I relaxed a little when he got on the open road, out of Charming; resting my head on Tig's shoulder. The corner's of his mouth tugged up into a grin, he was happy. It had been a _long _time since it was him and I. I imagined us having a wildly romantic weekend but, I figured we might end up sleeping the whole time.

Tig didn't wear his cut, on account of the new "rules". I knew Tig hated it but, it was kind of liberating with no reaper. We didn't have to keep looking over our shoulders to see if another MC was eyeing us or have to worry about some douche bag thinking he could take Tig on because Tig was in a club. We were just like any other couple on a bike… kind of.

Tig sped up as we took the ramp onto the freeway, he sped in and out of cars. I could tell people were saying things like, "Look at that crazy man! He's gonna kill himself!" Of course, to the untrained eye it would look like Tig was a psychotic driver, going over the speed limit and weaving in and out of cars like an obstacle course but to me he was driving normally. Tig never truly screwed around on his bike anymore. Even driving erratically he was calculated, calm and focused.

Women in minivans honked their horns at us. Men in sports cars flipped us off. Tig and I smiled and waved; it would be a good weekend.

_Wendy sat in the waiting room, crying silently. Gemma sat across from her, taping her foot on the ground. Tara was speaking quietly with the doctors in the hallway. Kenny and Ellie were home with Opie. Chibs, Happy and Juice were sitting on one end, silent and stoic. Jax was desperately trying to get a hold of Gracie or Tig. These damn prepaid phones were worthless in the valley. _

_As Jax got another voicemail, Tara came into the room while the doctors waited outside; all of them looked grim. Jax flipped his phone shut. Gemma stood next to him, "She's going to need a kidney transplant," Tara said, Jax shook his head, looked at the ceiling and turned away. It was hard for him to control his anger, fear and sadness all at once. He turned back around. Tara continued, "It's expensive."_

"_Doesn't matter," Happy said, "We will all take care of it."_

_Tara agreed with a nod, "It's not only costly but risky and invasive. The doctor's are looking for a kidney but it could take up a week to find one for her. Until then she'll have to survive on one and that's questionable," she sounded cold but, Tara was slipping into a doctor-patient type of formality, "Even if she makes it through the week, gets the transplant and it takes - she'll have months of recovery."_

"_Do whatever needs to be done," Jax said, dialing Tig's number this time, "I don't care."_

_Tara nodded and went back to speak with the doctor's again. The group dispersed just as Tig answered the phone._

"Hey Jax," Tig said, as we entered our hotel room, "Kids being crazy?"

I giggled, I had had one too many martini's at the restaurant, "Tell him to give 'em a good whippin."

It was silent.

"We're on our way," Tig said, shutting the phone, "Gracie, get your shit. No, leave it. Get your purse, let's go."

I instantly sobered up. Tig's hands were shaking as he grabbed his wallet and his jacket and headed out the door, "What's going on? What happened?"

"It's Ava," Tig said, I felt my heart skip a beat. Tig exhaled a shaky breath, "There was a shooting… at our place… Ava is hurt."

I ran through the hospital, up to the third floor that I had become so accustomed to when Abel was born. Tig ran behind me. I had tears streaming down my face and my lungs and throat hurt.

Jax emerged from the waiting room down the hallway and I sprinted to him, he caught me and stopped me from going further, "She's in surgery," he said, "You can see her after."

I started sobbing, screaming into Jax's chest. Jax put one arm around me and one on the back of my neck. He knew he couldn't comfort her enough. After a few minutes, I didn't calm down but I managed to stop bawling. Jax handed me off to Gemma and she held me. Tig stood stoically, "What happened? Why did this happen," I asked, sitting down on the couch with Gemma.

"Somebody is angry," Jax said, he was giving me the sugar coated version, "Retaliation," Jax looked at Tig, "From the Niners."

Tig put his hands on his head and walked out, I could hear him crying as he walked away, "Retaliation for what," I felt vomit rising in my stomach and my blood began to boil, "Retaliation for what, Jackson," I stood up, unable to control any emotion. I cried and snarled and laughed like a maniac, "FOR WHAT, JACKSON!"

"For Tig," he said, putting his hands on my waist and steadying me, "Tig killed Laroy's old lady."

I screamed and bellowed and ran out into the hallway. Tig had his forehead on the wall, "YOU. YOU DID THIS," I screeched at Tig. I ran at him, claws out and pushed him down the hallway, "Get out of here," I screamed, "This is your fault," Tig sputtered and spat but, could not think of a retort, I slapped at him and my nails caught his cheek, leaving four scratches, "She's you're daughter! Our baby! She's gonna fucking die!" Jackson grabbed me around the waist and told Tig to go somewhere else. I turned around to Jax and went to hit him but I saw the same anger and disappointment in his eyes that I felt inside of me. I let him pull me close and wrapped my arms around his neck and cried into his neck, "She's gonna die, she's gonna die!"

I saw Opie coming down the hall with Kenny, Ellie and Murphy. I could only imagine what happened to Connor. I instantly left Jax and went to them, "Babies," I said, falling down to their level and pulling them close. Ellie cried as hard as I did, Kenny stood silent like his father. I looked up at Opie and took his hand while I held Ellie. They were unharmed but, terrified, "I'm so sorry," I said to them, I stood up and we walked into the waiting room. There was nothing any of us could do at the moment.

Kenny took the chair in between Juice and Happy. Happy put his arm around him and the three of them wore the same scowl. Ellie sat next to Gemma and I. Connor followed me and put his head on my knee, looking at me with sympathy and sadness. Poor thing was as distraught as we were, "Murphy is dead," Ellie said quietly, "He was in Ava's room."

I choked on my breath and squeaked a little as I tried to be a comfort to Ellie. Margaret Murphy walked by and saw us, she stepped in with a somber look on her face, "I am so sorry this has happened," she said, formality reeked in her voice, "Visiting hours have been extended for you all.

"Thanks," Gemma said, before anyone could speak. Margaret walked away quickly.

It was two hours before anything happened. I cried quietly, unable to control it. Happy, Juice and Chibs had all retreated to the clubhouse, Gemma went with them. No one went to visit Clay. Jax and Opie sat in the corner, quietly discussing what would be done. Kenny had fallen asleep, Ellie was staring at the television with a blank stare; I knew she was replaying the night before in her head.

Tara walked into the room, I jumped up. She smiled, "I think she's going to be okay," I sobbed again, Tara continued sitting me down and she sat next to me, "The kidney she needs will be here tonight. She'll go into surgery as soon as it gets here. Her internal injuries were minimal and contained. Recovery will be long, she won't be home for weeks, probably a couple of months."

"But she's okay," Jax asked.

"All she has is the transplant tonight and then she only has minor surgeries from now on," Tara said, "You have a strong daughter, Gracie."

I was crying with relief at this point, "Can I see her?"

"I can only let you look at her through the viewing window," Tara said, "She kind of in lockdown for awhile with the transplant happening."

"I want to see her," I said, standing up and hugging Tara, "Thank you so much."

"I'll call Tig," Jax said, walking next to me.

"No," I snapped, "He doesn't deserve to know."

"Gracie," Jax said, "Ava is his, too."

"No," I said, looking forward. I thought that I should be surprised, should need Tig at my side. That time, that part of my life was done. I could not forgive him anymore. This one could not slide, "Not anymore. He's lost that privilege," saying it out loud didn't make me hurt or sad or anything. I felt numb to him.

The group was silent after that. We stopped at a big picture window and there was Ava. She had one I.V. in her, I had imagined more tubes than that. She was sleeping soundly, dark circles under her eyes, other than that she looked normal. You wouldn't have known she had had a bullet in her or was currently missing a kidney. The nurse came out, "You must be Mrs. Trager," she smiled.

"No," I said. What was my last name? I didn't belong to my biological family. I certainly didn't belong to Tig Trager. I looked from Opie to Jax, "Just call me Gracie, please."

"Alright, Gracie," she said, a little confused, "Your daughter is strong. She was awake only a few minutes ago, she even managed to smile when I was talking to her."

"She's like her mother," Opie said, putting an arm around me.

The nurse smiled again, "Honestly, I think she'll be fine. Doctor Knowles and Mrs. Murphy have specifically assigned me to her care. If you would like go to home and rest, I can certainly call you if anything happens."

I was silent. I didn't want to leave her but, I needed to get Kenny and Ellie recovered and situated somewhere. I needed to get my things. Ava smiled in her sleep, I was reassured by that, "Alright," I said, "I'll get some of our things together. Please, call me if anything happens."

"Of course, Mrs…. Gracie," she smiled and went back into the nursery.

I wiped my face off, feeling reassured by Tara overseeing Ava's recovery and Ava smiling in her bed. I took a deep breath, "Opie, take the kids to your house. Wait for me," I kissed Kenny and Ellie, and stood back up, addressing Jax, "Please take me home. I need to get my things."

Jax nodded. We rode his bike to my home. The police had gone but, remnants of the yellow tape remained. Bullet holes peppered the front of my house. The window to Ava's room was gone, the thickness of the punctures was greater there. It made me sick but, I reminded myself of Ava's willingness to recover.

Tig's bike was in the driveway.

"Wait here," I said, kissing Jax on the cheek. I walked inside, the house was in shambles. The bullet holes in the walls had left dust of drywall and plaster and wood everywhere. It was so quiet. I walked into the bedroom, Tig was sitting on the bed. He looked up at me. I ignored him, grabbing a duffle bag from the top of the closet; I grabbed the box that contained Piney's cut and slipped in to the bottom of the bag. I opened my dresser drawers and began to stuff my clothes away, "Where are you going," Tig asked, quietly.

"Away from you," I said, monotonously.

The bed groaned as Tig stood up, "This was an accident. We're in this together. You and me. I love you."

I spun around, "No," I said, I felt myself shaking, "Too many things, at your hands, have been accidents. First my sister. Now my daughter," my voice trembled with anger, not sadness, "I don't want you anymore. Looking at you makes me sick. You make me sick."

I turned around and emptied the last of my things into the bag. I grabbed another from the closet and started on my clothes there. I filled that one quickly. I drug them out to the door and went to fill one more thing with Ava's things. Opie had already collected his kid's things. Tig stood in the middle of the living, hands on his hips looking distantly at the floor. No expression on his face. His curls hung nearly straight on his head. After tossing Ava's bag on top of mine, I walked back over to Tig. I slipped his ring off of my finger and held it out to him. He looked at me with the saddest face I had ever seen. It did nothing, quietly, "Please, stay," he begged.

I dropped the ring at his feet; it landed silently on the carpet. I walked to the door, heaved the bags up and without looking at him, said, "Stay away from me and my daughter," the door slammed behind me.

_Tig stood in the living room, looking down at the diamond ring. It felt like it was a thousand miles away and so were Gracie and his daughter. He felt the walls closing in on him and crumbling at the same time. He didn't want a drink or a smoke or pussy. He didn't know what he wanted. He barely knew what happened in the last six hours. He knew she was gone. _

Opie's house was a split level on the opposite side of town as Tig's house. It was white with a black roof. It was in need of a landscaping makeover. I hauled my things inside, Opie came inside from the fenced in backyard, "Hey," he said, taking the bags and putting them in the spare bedroom.

I sat on the bed and stared at my feet. Opie sat next to me, I turned to look at him, "I remember when you got that," I said, running my fingers over the tattoo that read "Grace" in script on his neck, "Sixteen… Donna was so pissed that it wasn't her name."

Opie smiled and kissed me, he lingered just a moment too long and I pulled away, "I'm gonna change and go back to the hospital," he nodded and walked out, "Opie," I said, "I didn't even ask if we could come here."

Opie scoffed, "You never need to ask that, Gracie, ever."

I held Ava. She slept soundly, the anesthesia still in her blood. I wore a crunchy blue gown over my clothes, little puffy covers over my shoes and hair and rubber gloves on my hands. I rocked my baby girl in the sterilized nursery. It was four o'clock in the morning; I was beginning to feel it. I didn't want to leave her though, overnight by herself. Jackson quietly came in, dressed in the same blue uniform as I, "Seems like yesterday it was me in your position," he said, kneeling on the floor next to me and kissing Ava's head.

"I think we are good at making strong babies," I said, not bothering with my volume level – Ava wasn't waking up any time soon.

We were quiet for a few moments, both of us staring at Ava. Jax sighed, "You going to go back?"

I didn't look at him, "No."

I made my way home after Ava's surgery; it was successful. A long hot shower relieved the tension in my neck and shoulders. I heard Opie and the kids out in the living room, watching Wheel of Fortune and guessing the words and phrases quietly. I dressed in some knit pajama pants and a black tank top. After seeing most of my wardrobe today, I realized that black tank tops were something I fancied.

As I looked at my bags, I felt reality set in. I really had left him; Ava was really at Saint Thomas. I crawled into bed and began to weep again. That kind of cry you silently do when you don't want anyone to hear you. My door cracked open and Opie stood outside it, "You okay?"

"Not really," I said, wiping my face and pulling the covers up, turning away from the light of the hallway.

He walked in silently and slipped under the covers. Opie pulled me close to him and I pushed my hair under my neck so it wouldn't strangle him. He was shirtless and his skin was comforting against mine. I continued to cry, "Why did I think it would ever work," I said, talking to Opie and myself, "Why did I think it would last," Opie said nothing, only pushed my curls behind my ears and repeated the motion even though no hair was loose, "I don't know how I can see him anymore," I said, "I should have left when I had the chance," I sniffled, "I'm going to end up like Donna and David."

Opie sat up, I knew I had gone too far. He picked me up by the arms and turned me to look at him, "You never say that again," he said, "Everything that has happened has happened for some reason or another."

"What reason, Ope," I asked, "It's my fate to be miserable? For everyone I love to die?"

"No," Opie said, "To end up with the people who love you the most."


	34. Chapter 34

Life without Tig.

Ava was home, she recovered quickly – the doctor's were surprised at the speed. Apparently I had passed on my "gunshot wound recovery speed" onto my daughter. After a few days of dialysis, she was weaned off of the procedure and went home strong and healthy. We had settled into Opie's house, I had wanted to get my own apartment but, Jax and Opie made me stay put. I should have known.

"Time for school," I hollered in the kitchen, it was a Friday morning and the kids were ready for school to be out before the bus even showed up. Opie shuffled out of his bedroom, looking hung over. His long hair was a mess and he could barely keep his eyes open. The kids didn't respond, "Kenny and Ellie Winston you have three minutes until the bus gets here, let's go!"

"Please, for the love of God stop yelling," Opie begged, rubbing his temples.

"Welcome to fatherhood," I said, handing Kenny and Ellie their bags and sack lunches.

I walked them to the door, kissed them both and they ran out to catch the bus with the other group of kids that had gathered on the corner. Opie was sitting on the couch, skimming over the paper. He wore jeans from yesterday but no shirt, "Party at SAMCRO tonight," he said, without looking up, "Inauguration kind of thing. Jax didn't want it but, everyone is riding in."

"Sounds like fun," I said, "I'll call Neeta, send the kids to Jax and Tara's." Opie nodded but went back to his paper and sighed dramatically, "What is it," I asked.

"Tig's been asking about you," Opie said, sitting back on the couch.

"And?"

"And I think you need to reconsider your decision."

_Opie choked out the words he had rehearsed over and over in his head. He didn't want to send her back to Tig but, he would do it anyway. Gracie was a shadow of herself without him; even with Ava back in her arms. He hated seeing her eyes red and face wet from crying. If he could take her up and kiss her like he wanted, sleep next to her like he wanted; he knew everyone would be okay._

I went and flopped down on the couch next to him, "I miss him."

"Tell me something I don't know," Opie said, turning the page of paper.

"I just can't keep pushing everything he's done into the back of my brain," I said, feeling my eyes moisten, "When this all happened, all I could think of was that it was my fault I didn't get out of there sooner. That it was my fault because I brought a baby into a world like this, that I kept her around a man who would have no problem killing someone's wife."

"For Kenny or Ellie or you or Ava," Opie said, "I would kill anyone I had to. It's what we do."

"He killed my sister, Opie," I said, "How could I ever think… how could I ever forgive," I turned to Opie, "How could you stand to look at me? At him? After all that he did?"

"Because you loved him, Gracie," Opie said, "And, I love you."

I smiled at Opie and hugged him, his chin on the top of my head, "I love you too, Ope. You're my best friend."

"Grace," he said, and my head shot up when he didn't add the "ie", "I love you more than that."

"What are you talking about," I asked, thinking this would be a 'I love you this much' game and end in a wrestling match like when we were kids.

"I love you like Tig loves you. Like David loved you," Opie said, his chest rising and falling, his shoulders sagged like an unbearable weight had been lifted off of them, "I always have," he was excited now and he took my face in his hands, "Always!"

And then, he kissed me. For a split second, I had a mind to kiss him back but, I felt my eyebrows furrow and I pushed him away, "No," I choked out, "No! You can't tell me to go back to Tig and then tell me you love me… like _that!"_

Opie looked confused, like maybe that wasn't exactly how he had planned that situation. I stood up and quickly walked to my room, could l love Opie that way? No. Ew? Maybe? What about Tig? Well, fuck. Ava was sleeping so I flopped on the bed and closed my eyes, rubbing my temples.

Well, fuck was right.

Neeta was over, bringing Abel and Thomas with her. All of the kids were watching a movie, Neeta was reading when I left. I wore a tight little number, a black dress with a lace overlay and long sleeves that showed my skin – only on my arms. In SAMCRO, a new president party was much like an inauguration ball. You wore your best – or, as best as it got for some. Mostly the old ladies were the ones who showed off their wardrobe and jewelry. I had decided to take two and a half hours and straighten my hair, with the help of Ellie. It was down to the middle of my back and shown in the lights of parking lot. I loved it; I would do it more often if it didn't take all day. The parking lot was full. Bikes and cars and women.

I entered the clubhouse alone. It was a first in a long time; I held my chin high as I was greeted here and there. Word must have gotten around because there were a ton of skanks on Tig and people were blatantly staring at my ringless fingers. I saw Tara in the corner, talking with Jax, "Is it that obvious," I sighed, looking around.

"Only to everyone," Tara smiled, she wore a short blue dress that sparkled, she looked good, "I like your hair."

I glanced that way again and Tig jerked his head down the hallway. Jax pushed me in that direction, "Just talk to him, he is your baby daddy."

"Fuck off, Jax," I said, walking down the hallway, letting Tig follow. He was wearing dark jeans and a dark blue button up. His hair was freshly washed and extra curly. I pushed open the door to the dorm we usually shared; now Happy had taken over it. I turned around and met Tig's eyes after he closed the door. I was done after that.

I pounced on him, kissing his face; nearly crawling up him. It's funny how he could make me feel that way; like I would explode if I didn't have him right then. Something about the look in his eyes, the way his lips parted slightly. The ends of every nerve in my body were on fire and then they all went haywire when Tig pushed me away, "Stop, Gracie."

Tig just turned down a fuck, shit was about to get real.


	35. Chapter 35

_Tig looked at Gracie, her cheeks were red and her chest was rising and falling quickly in her little dress. It took every bone, muscle and brainwave he had to not have her right now, against the wall. He swallowed his lust, "You're right," he said, leaning against the beat up dresser, "I think we should stay away from each other for awhile."_

_Gracie blinked her eyes like she didn't understand completely, "You serious?"_

"_Yeah, I am."_

_Gracie's face went blank and Tig felt his heart break. She was so damn confusing. He didn't question her love for him or his for her. She was right, he knew it; he was a danger to Ava and Gracie. He obviously couldn't keep them safe, that was obvious. Gracie adjusted her dress, ran her fingers through her hair and turned the door knob. Tig kept his head bowed, "This is the best I can do," Gracie stopped but, continued staring out the door, Tig spoke again, "For all of us."_

I felt like I would puke. Our separation hadn't seemed real until now. I left Tig silently in the dorm and walked like a zombie; blank stare, arms by my sides, through the crowded clubhouse. I walked past Opie and he stared at me, concerned. I could feel him following me out into the cool air, "What'd he say to you?"

Jax quietly joined us, standing at my side as well. He was silent, waiting for my response.

"Nothing that wasn't expected," I quietly spoke, lighting a cigarette I had swiped from the bar. I blew out the hot smoke, "I suppose we will have to call it a mutual separation. Irreconcilable differences," I choked out a chuckle, "meaning neither of us enjoys getting shot at," Jax put my hand in his and Opie put his arm around me and gave a squeeze, he reminded me so much of Piney in that moment, Jax so much of John Teller.

We stood in silence, looking at the packed parking lot, in front of the garage doors. I closed my eyes and could feel myself surrounded by people who I loved and love me. I felt the presence of Piney, Donna and David. Kozik and Half Sack. The ghosts of our pasts were very much the ghosts of our present, preparing us for our futures.

The party went on, Tig stood in one corner and I stood in the other, next to Jax. I was downing the alcohol like no other, I had called Neeta and informed her that I would pick the kids up in the morning, "Sure thing, Gracie," she had said, knowing I would pay her well and Opie would probably pick them up before the night was through, "Be safe."

I took another shot of tequila and lit another cigarette, Jax walked over to me, "You should probably slow down," he said, pushing the bottle away from me.

"Tomorrow, I get to go back to being a housewife in jeans and oversized t-shirts, Jax," I said, slurring a bit, "Tonight, I'm gonna get wasted. And then, I'm going to get laid. And tomorrow, all will be well."

Jax smiled at me and shook his head, "You're a crazy bitch."

"Tell me about it, Pres," I grinned, sipping right out of the bottle. I scanned the room for someone who looked horny, so what that I wasn't. All these years with Tig, I knew that even if I didn't want some and I got it, I'd feel a hell of a lot better. There he was again, everything came back around to Tig. What I ate, what I drank, who I fucked (who I was gonna fuck) what I wore, what I packed in Kenny's lunch. I took another swig and found Tig staring at me from across the room. Again.

I lost it. I grabbed the bottle and a pack of cigarettes, Jax held out a lighter and I snatched it as I walked by, "Thanks."

I pushed my way through the ever thickening, ever rowdy club and outside. I stomped over to the ladder to the roof, put the cigarettes and lighter in my bra and climbed up with one arm and high heels. I could do anything when I was pissed.

I sat on the roof and propped my legs up on the cinder blocks in front of me. Lit another cigarette, it tasted good; that combined with the booze, I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up on the roof. I gave myself five seconds before I started crying, "Always fucking crying," I said out loud, to no one, "Crying like a little bitch, fucking Gemma doesn't cry. Tara doesn't cry… Tara's a fucking crazy bitch anyway," I sniffled and wiped my face with the back of my hands and continued my rant to myself, "And to top it all off, there isn't anyone else I want to bang here anyway. Shoulda bought a vibrator when I had the chance."

Cold wind blew in my face and the clouds above me lit up with lightning followed quickly by thunder. In a split second, giant raindrops poured out of the sky, "You gotta be kidding me," I said, sitting there already soaked in a matter of moments. I grumbled as I walked down the edge of the roof and climbed down with extreme caution. I stumbled through mud puddles probably look extremely dramatic, if not like a hooker. I saw Tig walk out of the clubhouse with a girl following him; she looked familiar but, the liquor and the rain making my makeup run made it hard for me to tell. I went into stealth mode; taking off my shoes and slinking low to the ground among the bikes, holding my shoes and bottle of booze to my chest with one arm. I crawled closer to Tig but, couldn't hear him talking over the rain. Guys were quickly walking out, reluctantly, out into the rain to pull their bikes under shelters and into the garage. I kept my cover and continued to crawl towards Tig, a headlight from a bike shone on him and the woman he was kissing; their hands all over each other. I stood straight up and Gemma saw me, quickly untangling from Tig.

_Gracie's eyes were huge and when someone flicked on the big flood lights for a little extra help in the rain, Tig and Gemma could see her makeup running and her hair trying to curl back into its normal style. She adjusted the load of things in her hands and began to chuck shoes at both of them, "WHAT THE HELL?" She screeched, "You gotta be fucking kidding me!" _

"_Get inside, Gem," Tig said, Gemma obliged. _

I watched as Gemma slunk inside, Opie and Jax came out a few minutes later. I walked up to Tig, "How long has that been going on," I cried above the rain. Tig shook his head and Opie was walking towards me, out into the rain.

"Let's go home," Opie pulled me away but, I wrenched away from.

"Fuck this bullshit," I screamed, I stormed off, still barefoot towards the street, "Do not fucking follow me." My feet were freezing as I walked down the sidewalk in the rain. I couldn't believe Tig and Gemma, something told me that this little coupling hadn't happened in the last few hours. I got a ways down the road and a pair of headlights flashed over me; figuring it was Opie, I continued to walk.

A car pulled up next to me and the window rolled down, "Excuse me, Miss, do you need a ride?"

I hollered as the rain poured down harder and the wind picked up, "Can't a girl take a walk around here?"

"Sure but, barefoot, wearing a cocktail dress and in a downpour isn't the best time," the voice called again. I looked over and saw Sherriff Eli Roosevelt in his old Jeep, "Can I give you a ride?"

"Don't really know where I want to go," I said, continuing my trudge.

"Looks like you're headed somewhere," he said, creeping along next to the curb of the sidewalk.

_How about a nice trip to Go Fuck Yourselfville with a pit stop at suck my dick? _I thought but, probably a better idea to take the offer. I opened the door and got in the car, it was warm in there and I realized how cold I actually was.

"Been at the party," Sherriff Roosevelt asked, he already knew the answer, "Must have been some drama."

"How could you tell," I scoffed, wiggling my toes under the heater. I looked out the window and saw we were about to pass the cemetery, "How about you take me here," I said, pointing out the window.

"Oh… okay then," he said, "I was hoping to take you somewhere not outdoors but, okay."

He stopped the car and I stepped out into the rain again, "Thanks, Sherriff."

"Want me to wait," he asked, "I can do that."

"That's okay," I smiled politely, "I've got some catching up to do with a lot of folks around here."

Roosevelt nodded, "Good luck, Miss Trager."

"Not Miss Trager anymore," I sighed, "Back to the old Gracie Learner."

"Good luck, Miss Learner," he said, rolling up the window and driving away.

My feet squished into the grass, I knelt first next to John Teller's headstone, "Well, I guess everyone knows about you now," I talked to no one as was the theme of the night, "Piney's probably told you everything. I miss him so much," I choked a little, "I need him now more than ever. Tell him I miss him, I love you both."

I carried onto the next grave, Half-Sack's, "Prospect," I said, picking up a few cigarette butts and chucking them into the bushes, "Found some new guys but, they aren't as cute," I smiled, "Or smart. A little slow."

It took some courage to see David. His mom had planted some flowers around his headstone, the rain was destroying them, "You would shit your pants if you saw Charming, Davey," I said, "To see all of us. My kid is all shot up, Opie's wife left him, Jax has two kids now – he's President. Clay is in the hospital. Piney's dead. Tig and I done."

I could see David in his khaki uniform shaking his head, disgusted, "I miss you. I keep thinking that I could just go to your house and hide for a few days but, it's still empty. Well, all your stuff is still there. Your brother mows the lawn; I see your mom has been gardening there a lot."

I stood in front of David for awhile, remembering "the good old days". A loud clap of thunder made me jump and I said good-bye, starting the long walk to see my sister. Donna was on the other side of the cemetery. I was so glad it was dark, and people couldn't see the scary lady walking around the graveyard. I probably looked like the girl from "the Ring" but with a good taste in clothes.

I sat on the wet grass and propped myself up on Donna's tombstone, stretching my legs out, "Opie said he loved me. Tig and I broke up, for real this time. I have Ava. She looks just like you. I'm living with Opie… not like that, although I don't know what he's thinking… about us. I feel like, I'm stealing your man and I don't want you to be disappointed in me," at this point, I was sobbing rather than talking, "I fucking don't know what to do or where to go at this point. Not that I ever fucking knew. I'm so tired of this shit. Crying all the time and not knowing. Always fucking asking "what now" and fucking Tig, he's been with Gemma for fuck's sake."

I heard a motorcycle pull up and turn off and I slid in the mud, in front of Donna's headstone, hiding.

"Grace," I heard Opie's voice and continued to cry. Now like a little child being caught and too embarrassed to fess up, "Grace get over here right now, Sherriff called me and told me where you were."

I cried harder, "Fucking asshole," I said to myself, shrinking lower.

I heard Opie coming closer, "Grace, come here right now! I'm cold and wet and I don't want to be out here," I screamed when two big hands grabbed a hold of me and pulled me upright, Opie was as wet as I was but, looked warmer with his heavy clothes and boots on, "What the hell, Gracie," Opie said, "I was freaking out. Thought the Niner's or something… you're shivering, dammit Gracie. Let's just go home."

Opie took my hand and walked away but, I pulled him back to me, slung my arms around his neck and kissed him. He hesitated for a moment but, lifted me up with one arm and holding my head with the others. It seemed quick, almost too quick. Opie's mouth was warm, heat radiated off of him and I was freezing, "Take me home, please," and he picked me up and carried me to his bike, I cried on his shoulder. I caught his face in the lightning and he was a picture of seriousness. He was a man on a mission.

I walked in the house and struggled with the zipper on my heavy, wet dress as I shuffled down the hallway, "Help me," I said, to Opie behind me. He carefully unclasped the hook and slid the zipper down to my underwear – lacy and black to match the dress.

I felt his lips on my shoulder and leaned back against him, "This want you want," he asked against my skin.

"I'll know in the morning."


	36. Chapter 36

_John Teller watched as Gracie Learner, Opie Winston and his son Jackson Teller walked down the sidewalk to school. It was "uncool" to take the bus anymore. Jax laughed at something and Gracie pushed him off the sidewalk, he quickly jumped back up and slung his arm around her. John knew this was one of the last times he'd see them, if it wasn't the last time already. He had accepted that he would die at Clay's hands and they only thing that worried him was that Jax wouldn't know how much he meant to him, Gracie and Opie wouldn't know how much he loved them…_

_Gracie sat bored, her head propped up on her hand in math class. She doodled on her notebook, daydreaming. Everyone jumped when the secretary's voice screeched over the loudspeaker, "Grace Learner, please report to the principal's office."_

_Gracie eagerly packed up her things and walked leisurely to the office, she was going to make skipping math last as long as she could. When she turned the corner and saw Jax crying into his mom's shoulder, she wished she was in math class. A very young Tig walked up to her, his hair was shorn close to his head and his skin was smooth, "Hey kid," he said, taking the books and notebook from her hands, "John was in an accident today. He's in the hospital, not doing so great."_

_Gracie walked over to Jax and put her arms around both him and Gemma, "I'm so sorry, Jax," she said._

"_We need to go to the hospital," Gemma said, her voice strong as ever._

_Tig let Gracie ride with him; he knew she liked to do that. Her scrawny arms barely reached around him and he had had to build special foot pegs for the kids. Gracie hopped off the bike as Tig went to park and ran to Piney's side, who was waiting for them at the door of Saint Thomas. She took his hand and walked with everyone up to John's room. _

_She waited outside, sitting next to Piney as Jax and Gemma went inside the room. She rested her head on Piney's arm, his shoulder was too high for her to reach yet, "Is John going to die, Piney," she asked. Clay, Tig and Chibs looked at Gracie and then Piney._

_Piney cleared his throat, "He's not doing so good, baby."_

_Gracie's stomach tied in knots sitting outside, waiting. More and more members of Sons of Anarchy filled the hallway. Gracie saw Otto coming around the corner and stood up to greet him, "Hey baby girl," Otto said, hugging her and lifting her off the ground. Otto was a huge guy and Gracie's flip flop clad feet dangled above his knees. Luann at Otto's side, rubbed Gracie's back, comforting her. _

_Gemma came out of the room with Jax and Otto set Gracie down, who was instantly attached to Jackson. She peeked in the room and saw John, his chest and arms wrapped in bandages; his face relatively unscathed. He lifted a hand and winced as he motioned for Gracie to come in. She looked at Gemma, who nodded. Gracie went in and shut the door, backing into it. John patted the bed and Gracie slowly climbed up next to him, tossing her shoes on the floor, she laid on her stomach, propped her chin up on her hands and elbows and stared at John. John stared back._

"_I don't think I'm gonna make it," John said, his voice was scratchy._

"_I think you'll be okay," Gracie said, making John smile. If anyone was optimistic, it was her._

"_I need you to take care of Jax and Opie," John said, "Jax has a long road ahead of him, a tough life with tough decisions. You might not know what I'm talking about now but, remember that Clay can't ride forever. And when we're gone it's up to you three to make everything okay; to set SAMCRO on the right path," John began to cough and blood trickled down his chin, "Things aren't always what they seem, Gracie."_

_A nurse came in as John continued to cough up blood; Gracie jumped off the bed, grabbed her shoes and stood against the wall. John coughed violently and groaned before he went silent, "He's not breathing," the nurse yelled, "Get me some help in here!"_

_Gracie stood in the corner and watched the hysteria around her, wondering why no one was coming to get her. She watched a Doctor slice open John's throat and slide a breathing tube down his throat, deep red blood oozed around apparatus. His chest began to rise and fall again but, the time in between his inhales and his exhales scared Gracie the most. _

_John looked over to Gracie, winked at her and then closed his eyes, "John," Gracie said his name, "John?"_

_Otto and Piney came in the room, not realizing that the fifteen year old girl had been in there during the whole ordeal. Gracie stood in the corner, face white as a ghost, tears streaming down her face. Piney spoke quietly and hurriedly with the nurse, Otto picked Gracie up and hauled her out the door. He handed her off to Tig who sat down and held Gracie who sniffled against his shoulder, "Call everyone," Piney said, walking out of the hospital room, "Call everyone and get them here by dawn."_

"_Take her," Tig said, shifting Gracie to her own chair next to Luann._

_Tig, Bobby, Piney, Clay and Otto stood down the hall discussing their next move, "We're weak," Clay said, "We need to go to lockdown."_

"_We need to vote you in," Tig said to Clay, folding his arms across his chest._

_The group of men nodded their heads, "Lockdown and church, twenty four hours," Otto said, clapping a hand on Clay's shoulder._

_The clubhouse was full of people. Gracie wandered with her backpack full of extra clothes. Gemma had convinced her parents to let her stay with them over the weekend. They obliged, knowing that Gracie would have snuck out anyway. She found Gemma and handed her bags off to a guy named Happy, he was prospecting but his time was near up Gracie figured. He was terrifying but, when he knelt down and hugged Gracie, she felt better, "You must be Gracie," he said, giving her hand a squeeze. She nodded, "I've heard a lot of good things about you, kid."_

"_Someone's here to see you," Gemma said, pointing across the room. Gracie followed her finger._

"_Lenny," Gracie squeaked and ran across the room and jumped into Lenny the Pimp's arms, "Lenny, I missed you so much."_

"_Hey baby girl," Lenny said, his voice scratchy and a bit higher due to the tracheotomy hole in his neck, "I missed you, too. How you been?"_

"_I'm okay," Gracie said, Lennie sat her down, "You?"_

"_Better now that you're here."_

_Gracie stayed close to Lenny, Piney or Otto the rest of the night until they all went into the church room. Then she grabbed some dinner; food was always abundant, and sat next to Jax and Opie on the couches, "I think you're Dad is gonna be okay," she said._

_Jax was silent, as was Opie. Neither one believed her but, they wanted to. John Teller died the next day._

_Gracie rode in the procession, on the back of Lenny's bike. She buried her face in his cut as they slowly entered the graveyard; her ears pounded with the sound of hundreds of bikes followed them. The sound scared her a bit, the loud rumbling, the men she didn't know. Lenny parked the bike and Gracie hopped off, she stared around at the crowd of bikers. Otto walked over and knelt down, unbuckling the helmet and tossing it to Lenny. He tucked a curl behind her ear, "Don't be afraid of them, Gracie, they're your family. They will keep you safe, above everything at all costs," Otto said, "You're safe."_

"_C'mon baby," Luann said, taking Gracie's hand. _

_Gracie followed without question still looking around. Otto's voice rang loud and clear in her head: _Keep you safe, above everything, at all costs.

_Gracie straightened her shoulders, walked even with Luann and stood stoically amidst the crowds of SOA members and their old ladies. She stood between Opie and Luann, silently slid her hand into Opie's. _

I'll be in this life forever, _Gracie thought feeling Opie's hand tighten around hers, _Shame on me if I ever leave, shame on me if I ever choose a man outside of this life, this town. Shame on me if I ever give up, ever turn away or ever betray them, _Gracie vowed to herself, _I will protect them, comfort them and love them. I'll house them, clothe them, feed them and support them.

From this day onward, _Gracie gulped down fears of the future and remembered what John Teller's last words to her had been, _they are my family, I will save them.


	37. Chapter 37

"_Gray-say! What for din- ah, dammit all."_

_Tig took off his boots on his way to the kitchen and left them in the middle of the floor. He pulled out the bread and peanut butter and made himself a sandwich and poured himself a cup of questionably spoiled milk. It had been almost two weeks since Gracie went to Opie's place and Tig was still having trouble adjusting. Sure, Gemma kept him fed and fucked; but she was no Gracie. And Tig was having a hard time remembering that Gracie was gone._

_What had he expected? He hadn't done anything to stop her. He had only said "yeah, okay" instead of anything else under the sun he could have said to make her stay. At this point, all he wanted to do was sleep in a bed with Gracie on one side and Ava on the other. And that was the only thing in this world he wasn't getting. _

_Word of mouth had it that Opie and Gracie were doing more than just being roommates. A little bug in Tig's brain ticked away at him, "Seems fair," it said, "You took Donna from him, why shouldn't he take Gracie from you. Eye for an eye."_

_It was quiet in the house. Tig wasn't used it and it made him uncomfortable; between the kids, the dogs and Gracie it was chaotic at best. Other than the buzz of the air conditioning it was silent. Even the pool was lonely; slowly turning green in the summer sun. Tig had no idea how to take care of the dumb ass thing, "Piece of shit," he grumbled._

_Chibs sat in the garage, on a low stool, tinkering with his bike. One, half full beer bottle sat next to him and an empty one next to that. He had just gotten off the phone with Fiona, they had argued a bit. Chibs was afraid to leave his club and especially Jackson at a time like this but, Fiona and Kerrianne needed him over there. He was torn between being a father to his daughter and filling in for Jax's. Where the fuck was Piney when he needed him? _

_Opie came rumbling into the parking lot, parking his bike next to Chibs; akin to their order at the table. Opie wore a sparkle in his eye and a little spring in his step and Chibs took notice, remembering the rumors flying of Opie and Gracie. Chibs shook his head and sighed, oh the drama._

_Opie felt better. He felt more alive than ever. The wind felt warm on his face and when it became too warm, a whoosh of cool would send him back to comfortable. His bike sounded amazing, never better. His kids were happy and giggling when he left home, Gracie was smiling, Ava was mimicking her, he hit every green light on the way to Teller-Morrow and he had found twenty dollars in his jeans that morning._

_He wasn't afraid of the drama he was probably causing, the heartache he was rooting in Tig. Because, for once in a very long he was having a damn good day._

_Jax was mulling over papers, bills and I.O.U.'s at the head of the church table. He rubbed his temples; he didn't know how he was going to get out of this mess with the Cartel or whoever the fuck they were. He heard Opie's bike pull up in the parking lot and tried to snap to attention. Jax had heard the rumors from most of the Crow Eaters._

_Opie pushed open the door with a shit eating look on his face, "Hey," he said, sitting in Chibs' old chair._

_Jax jerked his chin up, "Heard you and Gracie been shacking up?"_

_Opie stared at the table, "Not gonna say we didn't."_

_Jax stared at Opie for a second, making Opie clearly uncomfortable, "Well, how was it," Jax asked._

_Opie released a breath of air and shook his head, "Not too shabby, brother."_

"_That's so weird," Jax said, joking. Kind of. Of course he'd probably be able to sleep with Gracie too, she had a bangin' body. But, she was too much in the friend zone for that, "How're the kids handling it?"_

"_They don't know," Opie said, "At least, I don't think they do. We're gonna slow way down, take it easy. We don't need that kind of drama."_

_Another bike rumbled into the lot, sounding like Tig's, "I think you might get it," said Jax._

_Gemma sat in the office as Tig came inside, his face was red; either too much sun or already too much booze. Probably the latter with the gossip flying around. Tig sat in the chair across from the desk and his hands sat limp in his lap, he looked pitiful, "How you holding up," Gemma asked, leaning back and putting her feet on the desk._

"_How do I look," Tig snapped, running his hands through his frizzy hair, "Cause I feel like shit. She really fuckin' Opie?"_

"_Why don't you ask her yourself," Gemma said, nodding out the window. Gracie was pulling up in her big SUV; she looked good. She wore her signature black tank and jeans, her hair was straight again, shiny and falling well past her shoulders. She wore sunglasses and heels that were unfathomably tall and dangerous and looked so good, Tig thought as she walked on by without even looking at them._

"_Hey Gracie girl," Chibs said, hugging her and smacking a kiss on her cheek. His voiced dropped and he lowered his sunglasses to look at her, "Is it true… about you and Ope?" _

I sighed. Tara had text me earlier and warned me about the rumors, "Yeah, it's true," I said, "Well, only slightly. It's not like we're having wild sex parties every night, Chibs," I shook my head, "It was once."

"Well Opie's loved ya forever," Chibs said, smiling, "He's been skipping around here like a leprechaun on crack."

"Nice," I said, heading for the clubhouse door. The blinked a few times in the dark commons room after coming in from the sunny day. I heard Opie and Jax talking in the church room. I took a deep breath started walking towards them and stopped. What the hell had I put myself in the middle of? The door slammed behind me and there stood Tig. Well shit.

"Hi," I said, he _obviously _wasn't going to speak first.

"Hey," he said walking over to the bar. He was silent.

"I'm fine," I scoffed, "Thanks. Your daughter's alright, too."

"Good to hear," Tig said, taking a drink of vodka straight from the bottle.

"It's ten in the morning, Tig," I said, taking the bottle from his hand and putting the cap on it. He grabbed another from under the counter and drank some more.

"Leave me alone," he said with his lips against the bottle.

"I just came by to see if you wanted to come see your daughter," I raised my eyebrows in the "you have to or else" look.

"Yeah, I do," he put the lid on the bottle and put it away.

"Good," I stepped forward and kissed him once, quickly, casually, "Call me when you decide to. I have to pick up the kids around three so, it'd be nice if you came over then."

"Sure."

Tig stomped out and I heard Jax and Opie resume talking and I poked my head into the church room, "Am I interrupting?"

"Not really," Jax said, tossing papers down and staring at me. I looked down to Opie who desperately tried to conceal a smile by cocking his jaw and making funny faces with his lips.

"You told him," I shook my head and folded my arms, "Can't get away with any secrets around here can we? How are we not all in prison?"

"We don't keep the juicy secrets," Jax smiled, "You two shackin' up and getting down to business, that's the stuff we like to tell, sister."

"I get that," I sat up on the table and put my feet up on Opie's lap.

"Watch those spikes," Opie said adjusting himself away but keeping my legs under his arm.

It was quiet before any of us spoke, nowadays it seemed that our minds wandered to business and reality rather than shopping, sex or parties. I sighed, "What do we do with Clay," I looked from Opie to Jax, "He's got to get out of Saint Thomas sometime."

Jax scratched his head, "I know," he gritted his teeth together, "You know I want to kill that bastard. I just want to gut him in the parking lot."

"We all do," Opie stared at the table. He had lost so much.

"But we can't," I whispered, "What would it accomplish? It would make us feel a fuck of a lot better but, it would get us nowhere," it was silent again, "Look," I said, taking Opie's hand in mine, "Why don't we clean this place out? Get rid of anything that could steer us in the wrong direction. Keep running guns, go ahead but… take it far away from here. Let's make Teller-Morrow what is was when we were kids. _Safe. _A place where our kids can grow up. A garage, a home away from home, a place to make legitimate money. SAMCRO has become sloppy. We need to make it right for our families… not for our bank accounts."

Jax nodded, "Why aren't you President?"

I hopped off the table, kissed Jax and then Opie, "Because I'm a girl," I walked out and hollered back at them, "I'll pick up some steaks tonight, you all come over. Bring Tara and the kids."

"Yes ma'am," Jax said, getting back to work and Opie leaning towards the papers with him.

I walked outside into the garage and slipped my sunglasses on, "Come over with Jax tonight, boys. All of you."

Even without Tig, my life would go on. It would. I would focus on my family, my club, my town. We would crawl out of this damn hole and return to normal if it killed me. Jackson would take his rightful place. Opie and I would flourish, our children would grow and we, as a whole, would survive.

We always did.


	38. Chapter 38

"_Where is she," Jax asked Tara after releasing her from a long hug._

_Tara sighed, "Stockton called before I could tell her," Tara swayed a sleeping Thomas, "She dropped the kids off this morning. I can't find her."_

_Tig silently joined them, "She gone?"_

"_Yeah," Jax said, "Opie will be here tonight. She needs to be here."_

"_I've looked everywhere, Jax," Tara's voice trembled._

"_You do your thing, brother," Tig clapped a hand on Jax's shoulder, "I'll find her."_

_Tig roared off on his bike, Tara and Jax silently watched him go, "Gracie wanted you to tell them," Tara turned back to her husband, "She was more than adamant about that."_

"_She didn't tell them," Jax clenched his jaw and shook his head._

"_She's afraid," Tara ran a soft finger over his chin, "She's afraid to tell them that one more person is dead. Can you blame her, Jackson? She has no one left save those kids. She's had to tell them about Donna, Piney and Dawn. Now Opie?"_

_Jax nodded._

_Tig sped down the highway. He stopped at David Hale's old place, the café, the cemetery. She was gone. Tig couldn't think of anywhere else. But one. Tig took off, out of Charming and after speeding through the hills for awhile, he turned off on a gravel road. Tig breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Gracie's SUV in the familiar clearing. Tig parked his bike and turned it off, breathing in the clear, crisp, fall air. The last time he was here with Gracie, it seemed a lifetime ago. Tig walked through the trees until the pine needles gave way to sand. There she was. She sat in the sand and pebbles, her knees pulled to her chin, her arms around her legs. She looked incredibly childlike, "Grace," Tig called to her, "Grace."_

_She didn't move. Tig sat down next to her, wanting to smile as he looked out on the lake that held happier, dirtier memories. But he couldn't smile. _

"_I don't know what to do," Gracie said wiping her nose on her sleeve, "How am I supposed to explain this to the kids?" Tig picked at an invisible spot on his sleeve. Gracie sobbed but continued speaking, "You know," she cried, "I thought I'd be okay with Opie. He was gonna leave the club. After Stockton, after protecting the three of you… we were gonna slip away," she was crying so hard, Tig thought his heart would break in two. He felt his jaw quivering and tears were stinging his eyes, "I've lost everyone, Tig. I feel like I'm just waiting for the next person to go. Like it's a fucking list or something and I'm just checking them off until I'm alone. I can't take anymore, Tig. If Jax or Chibs or Tara or, or… you," she looked at him with mascara smudged eyes, "I can't lose you."_

"_I'm so sorry," Tig finally broke down._

"_I can't lose anymore," she screamed, "I can't give anymore," Gracie picked up handfuls of sand in her hands and threw it, "Oh God," she screamed and buried her face in her knees again._

_Tig moved closer to Gracie. He gently, carefully ran a hand through her unmanageable hair, "Grace," he pushed her hair away from her face, "Grace, I love you."_

_Gracie leapt at Tig, rage and sadness clouding her vision, "YOU KILLED THEM," she screamed, clawing at Tig, slapping him, "You killed them," Tig grabbed Gracie's wrists, fighting her as she screamed. She fought him for a moment longer, "You killed them," she whimpered, looking down at him, "You killed them… and… you hurt me." Gracie sank down to her knees, Tig still holding her arms, "I hate you," she bawled, "And I love you. And I hate that I love you. And I miss you." She was quiet as she fell into Tig's arms, burying her face in Tig's chest. For a moment, Tig hesitated to hold her, afraid that, just like his dreams, she would disappear into thin air. Finally, Tig held Gracie as if he would never have to let her go._


	39. Chapter 39

I walked through the clubhouse, pushing through the sea of bodies. I stumbled out of the crowd and into the empty space between it and the clubhouse. Jackson turned and I was in his arms in an instant, "I'm so sorry," he said into my shoulder, "I am so sorry."

I buried my head into the curve of his neck and wept for a moment before pulling away, "He's here," I glanced at the coffin in the church room and swallowed the painful lump in my throat.

On legs made of rubber I walked towards Opie. Chibs wrapped my hand in his and I steadied myself against him. He pressed a kiss against my temple, "It'll be alright, girl."

I nodded and reached out for the edge of the coffin, moving from Chibs to the table. I felt the floor swirling beneath me as I soaked in the view of my Opie. I ran my fingers over the tattoo on his neck, "Grace" it read. Tears, uncontrollable, streamed down my face. Jackson stood next to me and slipped a picture of the three of us into Opie's cut, "See you later, brother," he whispered.

I stepped back as the lid was slid over Opie and locked tight. The guys dawned their leather gloves and hoisted Opie into the air. Jackson led the procession and for a moment, I hesitated. My body found Tig's and I slipped my hand under his cut and walked next to him as he held Opie above his own shoulders.

As they slid Opie into the hearse, Tig pulled me close and I rested my head on his chest where his Sergeant at Arms patch used to be. He rubbed my back, warming me up as I shivered in the cool, fall air and watched Opie drive away.

_Tig walked Gracie back into the clubhouse and she trudged towards the apartments and sat down on the bed. She silently pulled her shoes off and took off her belt and her earrings, tossing all of it onto the floor. She crawled up onto the bed and lay down, sighing shakily. Tig pulled off his own boots, belt and cut and slid in behind her. He carefully wrapped an arm around her and she pulled his hand against her, lacing her fingers between his, "I don't know what to do," she whispered, staring blankly at the wall. _

"_Where are the kids," Tig asked, his scruff scratching her neck._

"_With Mary," Gracie sighed. Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she sat up, pulling it out and flipping it open, pressing it to her ear. Tig rolled onto his back and listened, "Thanks, for calling Sherriff," Gracie said, "I'd appreciate that, very much. I'm going to pick them up in a few days," there was a moment of silence, "Thank you. Thank you very much. No… that's all I need for now." Gracie hung up and she turned to look at Tig who was about to ask what the fuck was going on with the Sherriff, "He's having some guys of his keep an eye on the kids and Mary, that's all."_

"_Seriously," Tig felt his anger rising, "We can protect our own."_

"_No. You can't," Gracie said through gritted teeth. She moved to get off the bed but Tig caught her arm._

"_Don't… don't leave me," his eyes pleaded with her, working against the monotone of his voice. She eyed him for a moment before lying down next to him. _

"_We'll talk about this in the morning," Gracie stated, "About everything."_

I drove home and changed into fresh clothes. I picked up the house as much as I could before I had to head back to Teller-Morrow. Some lawyer was coming to the garage to settle Opie's affairs. I drove slowly, deliberately to the clubhouse. I winced as I walked past Piney's bike with the _for sale _sign tacked onto it. I quickly pulled it off and ripped it up. A shiny Mercedes Benz sat in the lot and I could only assume the lawyer had beaten me here. I took a deep breath, pulled my chin up and walked inside. Gemma leaned against the counter and stood up, walking towards me in that swingy way of hers, "Gracie, we need to talk about the kids," she said but, I brushed past her and she caught my arm.

I whirled around, "Take your hands off of me," I said through gritted teeth, "Take. Them. Off."

"You bring those kids here," she snapped in my face, "We don't let the cops take care of our own."

"We can't take care of our own," I desperately tried to control my anger; "I'm doing what I have to do. Now, take your hands off of me."

Gemma released, "You're making a mistake."

"The only mistake I ever made was letting you near my husband," I felt another round of uncontrollable tears prick at my eyes; "This is no longer your house."

Gemma's lip quivered and I could barely stop the corners of my mouth from pulling up: I had it the soft spot. I knew Gemma was struggling with her new status and it made me incredibly happy, "Go back to your pimp," I turned and walked into the church room.

A man in an expensive suit stood up, "Mrs. Trager," he held out his hand, "Nice to meet you. I'm so sorry for your loss," I nodded and sat down, "We're just waiting for Mrs. Winston, Mr. Teller and your husband." My mind played tricks with me. For a quick moment I imagined Donna, John Teller and David walking into the room… Jax, Lyla and Tig filed into together and took their seats at table, "Thank you all for coming. Now," the lawyer began shuffling through papers, "Now, Mrs. Winston my files show me that you never applied for adoption of Kenny and Ellie and that, in this unfortunate circumstance, they are officially in the custody of Mr. Teller and Mrs. Trager."

Lyla looked panicked for a moment and then relief washed over her face, "I… I think that's best."

I looked for Jax to Tig to the lawyer, "I'd like to apply for full custody of the kids," I blurted out, "Adopt them, whatever you want to call it."

"Well, that would be between you, Mr. Trager and Mrs. Winston," the lawyer looked over his glasses at Tig and I.

Tig rubbed the patch of hair under his bottom lip, "Okay," he nodded.

I looked to Jax who also nodded in approval, "Whatever Gracie wants."

The lawyer pushed a few sets of papers over to Lyla and then they were passed to Tig and I, we signed them quickly, "Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Trager, Kenny and Ellie are now yours."

"Now we move on to Mr. Winston's monetary affairs," the lawyer pulled out a new document.

I cut him off, "Lyla can have it all," everyone looked at me with wide eyes, "She can have it. The kids and I are taken care of."

We signed a few more documents and it was over. Everyone stood up to leave except me, "Tig you stay," I stood and hugged Lyla, "I want you to stay in Opie's house," I pulled her away so I could look in her eyes, "I want you to be a part of Kenny and Ellie's life. They love you and I want you to stay close." Lyla nodded, "You're part of this family," a very tiny part of my heart broke as I accepted Lyla into my life. I had put it off so long, "I'll be by to gather my things."

She walked out quickly, silently crying. Jax kissed me quickly, "I'm proud of you," he said, "I'll be around the shop today if you need me."

I shut the doors behind Jackson and Tig sat back down. I quickly lit a cigarette and took a long drag, "I think you know what we need to talk about." Tig rubbed the bridge of his nose, "I'm going to move back into the house with Ava and the kids," Tig avoided eye contact, "But you… if you can't get your act together and keep your dick in your pants, you're gone."

"Are we back together," he asked.

"No," I snapped, "You… you have a lot to make up for, Tig. I don't know if I can forgive you… Gemma? I mean… of all the people I had to catch you with, you picked her?"

"You left me, Gracie," he said, "_You _left _me. _You can't get pissed if you leave and I hook up with someone else."

I sighed, "Point made," I stamped the butt of the cigarette out in the ashtray and glanced over to him, "Was she…. Better than me?"

Tig grinned, "Not by a long shot."

I slugged him in the shoulder, "Whatever," I shook my head.

"I'm serious," he managed that sweet smile, "She was… pretty scary, actually."

"I missed you," I said admitted, "I was so angry but, I missed you so much."

"The house is a mess," Tig said wearily, "I can't clean. I think I broke the washer."

"What did you put in there," I wasn't surprised… at all.

"Two pairs of boots and a few pairs of jeans with the belts still on them," he grinned.

"You're so dumb," I stood and kissed the top of his head, "Let me get the place picked up and we can go get the kids."

I walked out, feeling a bit of weight lift from my shoulders. Gemma argued at the bar with Jax, I walked on as I didn't hear her bitching about me and giving Lyla everything. I drove to my and Tig's house. A mountain of newspapers made it impossible for me to open the door, "Good Lord, Tig," I said as he turned off his bike and walked up to the porch, "Couldn't you have tried to move them or… burn them… or let them not be here?"

"Sorry," he looked the opposite direction, away from me kicking the papers out of the way. I finally pushed the door open and stepped into our home. Everything was covered in dust and the air was stale. A pile of envelopes that had been pushed through the mail slot were littered on the floor.

"Have you been paying the bills," I asked, picking them up by the armload.

"You want me to lie," he asked, pushing past me.

I groaned and found the trash bags under the sink and tossed Tig one, "Just, put anything that's in a pile in a trash bag."

Four hours later, ten trash bags, two cans of Pledge, a bottle of Windex and a bottle of wine later… I had some semblance of a home again. Tig followed me out to my SUV, "I'm going to go pack my things tonight. I'll bring home the kids tomorrow." I was exhausted. My mind, my heart and my body. I only wanted to sleep.

Tig followed me home. I pulled into the driveway and jogged to the door, waving at Tig before he could even turn off his bike. I unlocked the door and quickly slid inside. I pressed myself against the door and felt the days emotions come pouring out of me. I could barely cover my mouth to control the sob. _Opie, I can't do this without you, _I thought, _I can't do it. _

Lyla came around the corner and I quickly wiped my eyes, "There are some things I packed up for you," she said, "In the bedroom. I'm gonna go to my mom's for a few days, let you get back to normal."

I scoffed, "I don't even know what normal is."

Lyla nodded, "It feels like this is normal… heartbreak."

"It won't ever seem normal without Opie," I looked around at the living room; signs of his life were still all around. His boots were on the floor, kicked off while he watched football on the couch. I walked to the kitchen and saw our dirty plates from our last dinner together. The half empty beer bottles on the kitchen table from that last night. _Jackson needs my help, _he had said, _when I get out, you and me and the kids are getting out of this shithole of a town. I promise. _I had fought relentlessly, knowing that, with our luck, you just didn't go in and go out of something… specially, prison. I walked him to the door and he leaned down and kissed me, my arms wrapping around his neck and his own arms pulling me off the floor, "Please don't go," I begged him, holding his face close to mine, "Let's just leave now." _I'll be back before you know it. Pack everything, _he had smiled at me, _I love you. _"I love you," I replied and kissed him once more.

…

I sat at the old-new place and sorted through the stack of bills on the table. The insurance on the house had lapsed, like months ago. I rubbed my temples and closed my eyes. The kids were out in the backyard and Ava was down for a nap.

Tara knocked on the door and let herself in, "Hey," she said, letting Thomas run out into the backyard yard to play on the swing set.

"Hi," I leaned back in the chair, pushing the stack of bills over.

"How are you holding up," she sat down across the table from me, "Haven't heard from you in a few days."

"We're okay," I sighed, "It's been like moving in slow motion these last few days. The kids seem okay but, their little brains are fucked up as it is. I don't know what to do."

Tara shook her head, "I don't really know either… I know that you and I are kind of it right now. Gemma is all kinds of crazy."

I snorted, "Yeah. No doubt," seizing the opportunity, "Tara do you mind watching the kids for awhile? I need to take care of some things," I nodded towards the pile of bills, "Tig isn't much of a housekeeper."

"Sure," she said, "I don't mind."

I relished the warm sun and cool breeze of autumn as I walked to the insurance agency. My boots clicked on the sidewalk and I almost fell asleep from the peace and quiet. I puffed on a cigarette and realized I was actually feeling okay. Not happy but, not terribly sad and crying. The blinds were drawn at the office, strange for such a nice, sunny day. I pushed the door open and the bell jingled above my head. I looked up and saw Jax, "Hey," I smiled and then took in my surroundings, "OH MY GOD."


	40. Chapter 40

"OH MY GOD," I dropped my file folder of papers, "What the fuck… WHAT. THE. FUCK."

"Uh," Juice, who was holding the camera, taping a man… woman… no, that's an Adam's apple… taping a man riding my insurance agent. Naked. The agent's eyes were taped open and the man-woman was clearly enjoying herself. Himself.

Jax smiled, "Hi there, Gracie! How ya doin'."

I bent down to collect the things I had dropped and looked up at the freak show, "Oh God," I snapped back up, "Terrible angle."

"What are ya doing here, Gracie," Tig took my elbow and led me to a back office. A lone metal desk with piles of papers and files sat on top of it. The fluorescent lights flickered. Sketchy.

"Taking care of our bills," I couldn't stop staring, craning my neck back to the front, "The real question is why are you making a gay porn with a bunch of manly ass men?"

"Shut up," Tig pressed me against the wall with his hips and his lips crushed onto mine, his tongue pushing between my teeth.

I pushed my hands against his chest, "Really," my mouth hung open in an "O", "THAT'S TURNING YOU ON?" I slapped Tig in the chest but, my hand didn't come away from it. I stared at my hand, feeling the heat beneath it, knowing the chest hair I had missed was waiting for me. I felt a fluttering in my stomach knowing I could kiss Tig's chest, feel his heartbeat on my cheek, "Fuck it," I said and I jumped, wrapping my legs around Tig's waist. He laughed, loudly and freely and it made tears prick at my eyes.

Tig stopped and his smile fell, "We don't have to," he ran his fingers down my cheeks.

"I want to," I wiped my cheeks dry and kissed Tig.

He quickly put me down and walked over to the desk, turning to give me an evil ass grin and pushed everything off the desk, "C'mere Gracie," he said, he wasn't smiling anymore; only a determined line set his face. He lifted me up onto the desk and pushed my dress up to my hips. A maxi dress was the best idea of the day, "No underwear?" Tig's eyes flashed at me, "Slut."

"Dickhead," I braced myself on the desk as Tig plunged himself into me, "OH MY GOD!" A series of highly regrettable sounds issued from my mouth and I pressed my mouth against Tig's shoulder. It had been _so _long. Too long. I ran my fingers through Tig's soft curls, ran my cheek and nose against the stubble on his face. His eyes were closed as he rocked his hips, "Look at me, Tig," I said, breathlessly. I turned his head until we were nose to nose, "I love you," I cried, tears streaming down my cheeks, uncontrollable tears containing every emotion known to the human body, "I love you."

_Jax walked back to the office, they had finished their little movie and were heading out. He pushed open the door and stopped, Gracie and Tig were a tangle on top of the desk, Gracie's legs were wrapped around Tig while he held her close, "I love you," she told him and it broke Jax's heart. _

_A lifetime ago, Jax and Gracie had been sitting on the roof of Teller-Morrow, "You believe in soul mates, Jax," Gracie asked, smiling with sparkling eyes. Jax shrugged his shoulders. Tara had been back for a few months now and he knew he loved her, knew he couldn't be with anyone else. Gracie sighed, "I do. I believe in soul mates," she snorted quietly, laughing at herself, shaking her head, "I used to think that it was David but… it's Tig. I know it is," she laughed out loud, "Who knew, I would fall in love with… him."_

_Jax watch a moment longer before letting the door close and walking away. _


	41. Chapter 41

School was out and summer break was in full swing. The basement had been remodeled to fit Kenny, Ellie and Piper. Kenny and Piper shared a room, it was all boy past that door. They shared a bunk bed that was usually barricaded with pillows and blankets as they were always defeating Storm Troopers. Ellie's room on the other hand was neat and tidy, Murphy and our newest addition, Princess, Tig's rescued pit bull were her roommates. The three of them were my helpers, babysitters and my confidants.

Ava's nursery was shared with Thomas on most weekends and whenever Tara had to work overtime at the hospital. Two cribs and a treasure trove of toys made it nearly impossible for anyone to function in that room. Abel usually slept with Tig and I, he was always a cuddly baby. Tig called him clingy. I called it adorable.

Tig and I were back to normal. As normal as we could make it, anyway. It was the general consensus that if we were with anyone else, that person was doomed. Can't live with Tig, everyone will die if I'm without him.

Tig was stretched out in his recliner; the kids had picked it out for him for Christmas. It was a monstrous leather thing with heaters, massagers and one arm flipped open to reveal a cooler for his beer and the other held all of his remotes. Ava was stretched out on top of him, sleeping and drooling up a storm. The kids were out splashing and screaming in the pool, Abel was running through the sprinkler, his scar that ran down his torso was bright red against his pale skin. He screamed in delight when the freezing water sprayed him. Thomas was asleep in the nursery.

I was pinning clothes of on the line outside, Tig's shirts always looked better when the wind did the drying. One of his new shirts had a dark brown stain that I couldn't get out. I knew most of Tig's stain histories but this one was new. I finished and walked the shirt inside, "What's this one?"

Tig looked up at me, away from the football game, "What?"

"This stain," I sat on the arm of his chair, "You usually tell me when you have to do _things._"

"I didn't want to upset you," he said, looking back to the television. He put his hand on my leg and kept it there.

"Tig," I said.

"It was the prison guard," Tig said quietly, avoiding eye contact, "The one that arranged it," Tig's breath caught in his throat and my question was answered. I wasn't happy but, I felt better. A lot better. Amidst all of this death and pain, it was strange that another death could make me feel okay. I kissed the top of his head and walked away, casually throwing the shirt in the trash. The morning's paper was on the table, I hadn't read it yet and stopped to flip through it. On the front page, Sheriff's Roosevelt's wife's picture was plastered across it.

"Tig," I said, "Tig did you read this?"

"What is it?"

"Roosevelt's wife was killed," I said, I grabbed my phone and dialed the Sheriff's cell. It rang and I thought it would go to voicemail.

"Hello," Eli answered, his voice was raw and riddled with exhaustion.

"Sheriff," I said, "It's Grace Trager, I just heard. I'm so sorry, is there anything I can do."

"Keep your doors locked."

"I'll bring some food over, alright," I said, "I'll see you this evening."

"You really don't have to."

"I have to," I said, "You've done so much for my family."

"Thank you, Grace."

The Sheriff hung up and Tig was standing in the behind me, holding Ava, "You gonna take stuff over?"

"Yes," I said, I could hear the annoyance in Tig's voice.

"He's a cop, Gracie."

"He's a friend," I said shortly, "We need to be on good terms with him, Tig. Even if it's for the kids," Tig opened his mouth to retort but, he didn't and I was relieved.

"I'm tired of dead people," Tig said, "I'm tired of depressing shit."

"It has to end sometime," I sighed, getting some things together to make a dinner for Roosevelt, "This can't go on forever. Things were good once, they can be good again."

I drove to Roosevelt's house on my own. He only lived a couple of blocks away. I made a generic casserole and felt ridiculously Stepford for it. I knocked on the door and Eli answered, "Hi," I said, "Can I come in?"

"Sure," he said, his eyes were rimmed in red and he wore blue jeans with a wrinkled shirt, "Sorry about the mess. CSI just left."

The house was torn apart. Remnants of yellow tape were skittered across the hallway, a decoration I was all too familiar with, "I brought you gross food."

Eli chuckled and put it in the fridge, "You're the only one, really. I don't have much family and all of Rita's lives on the east coast, they'll be here in the day after tomorrow."

I stood awkwardly in the doorway, I couldn't tell if I was welcomed or being a pest, "If I can help you out with like, housework or… something, you will let me know," Eli crossed his arms and nodded his head. He tried to fight his trembled lips but a sob escaped and he hung his head and cried. I pulled him to me and he wrapped his arms around me like a little boy and cried into my shoulder.

"She was all I had," he sobbed.

"You've got me," I held him, "And the kids love you," Eli sniffled and stood up, I wiped his face up, "Well, they like to ride in your car."

Eli laughed through his tears, "You're oddly comfortable in this situation."

"I'm used to it," I said, realizing how psychotic that sounded.

Eli looked at me in pity, "I shouldn't be so emotional, you've lost everyone."

"Well, not everyone."

"Oh God," Eli said, "That was horrible… I've never said anything so horrible."

I laughed now, "I've heard worse, actually," my phone buzzed in my pocket, Ellie text me to let me know Tig was still home alone with six children, "I should head back. Tig is in charge of the zoo and he doesn't fair well with bodily fluids."

Eli nodded and then opened the door, "Thank you, Gracie."

"Call me if you need anything," I said once more, "I mean it."

"Yes, ma'am," Eli said. He waited until I had pulled out of the driveway to shut the door.

Tig was too happy to hand Ava over to me with a full diaper. The kids were hungry after a day in the pool, Thomas was waking up and the first whimpers of a cry were coming from his crib and Thomas was wet and freezing but still running around with the sprinkler and a Popsicle.

Chaos.

Happy, loving, romantic, beautiful, chaos.


	42. Chapter 42

"I asked Tig to go up to the cabin until I get there," Jax loaded the boys into Gemma's car, "He'll be home before midnight, I promise."

My hands were on my hips, "I can watch the boys, Jax," I protested again, "Really, it's okay."

"Mom needs this, Gracie," Jax sighed, I had been fighting this all day, "Once she can get her family back in order, she'll be fine."

I rolled my eyes, "Anyone staying with her?"

"No, Gracie," Jax shut the door and Abel rolled down the window.

"Look at that face," I said, "He wants to stay with me."

"Gracie," Jax put his hands on my shoulders and kissed my forehead, "Shut up and stay home."

"You are the worst," I hugged him and then went to the window and poked Abel's round toddler tummy, "You call Aunt Gracie if you need her, right? Where's her phone number?"

"Backpack," Abel smiled triumphantly.

"What do you do if you need me," I reiterated the question.

Abel threw his hands in the air, "Call Aunt Gracie!"

"He's a genius," I said, walking back up to the porch, "I've raised you a genius, Jackson Teller."

"I am forever indebted to you," Jackson climbed in the car and pulled out of the driveway, I waved and went back inside.

The sun had gone down enough to put the backyard in the shadow of the house, everyone had climbed out of the pool and they were sprawled out on the living room floor catching up on the latest episodes of the Dr. Oz show. They were freakishly into Dr. Oz and someone always had a new malady every day. It was educational so, I let them watch it, only censoring episodes that were about "dangly bits" as Piper called them. Dangly bits; must be the porn star for a mother.

I curled up on the couch and propped Ava up on my lap, she watched intently as I flipped through a magazine. Ellie took it upon herself to order Chinese for all of us, "I like to hear their voices," she smiled, "One broccori and beef, one broccori and chicken," she mimicked them. Abel was the only genius I appeared to have raised I thought to myself.

Everyone was stuffed by bedtime. They went all went without a fight and I was in bed, stretched out and actually enjoying the entire thing without Tig trying to get it on or little feet jabbing me in the ribs.

It was after midnight, closer to two, "I was sleeping so well," I mumbled into my phone to Tig on the other end, "What on God's green Earth could you possibly need. And if it's phone sex… I will rape you."

"Gracie," Tig's voice was low and serious, I sat up in bed.

"What happened," I asked, getting out of my warm, comfortable, fantastic bed to prepare for a very long night.

"The boys were in an accident," Tig said, I could hear the hesitation in his voice, he didn't want to tell me, "Just get to Saint Thomas, okay? I already called Neeta, she's on her way."

I didn't say goodbye. I quietly woke up Ellie, "Come sleep in my bed, baby girl, I have to go meet Tig, okay?"

"Is something wrong," she asked, she walked upstairs with Princess and Murphy following behind her. All three crawled into my bed and I pulled the comforter up over Ellie.

"Gemma and the boys were in an accident," I said, "They're fine, I'm just going to go check on them, okay? I'll stay until Neeta gets here. You know where the guns are," Ellie nodded, "Good girl," Neeta arrived a few minutes later, made herself a pot of coffee and shooed me out the door, "The spare bedroom is all yours," I said, "Make yourself at home. You know that."

Neeta nearly kicked me to my car, "Yes, Gracie. I know where the guns are, have everyone on speed dial and have my overnight things."

I kissed Neeta's cheek, "I owe you everything."

"I love these babies, like my own," she smiled, "And the pay is good."

"I bought a few good bottles of wine," I said with the window rolled down and pulling out of the driveway, "Test them out, I'll be back to make you breakfast."

Saint Thomas was a familiar place nowadays. It was small so I knew most of the employees. The Trager household were frequent flyers in most departments. I went up to the pediatric floor and found the SAMCRO family in the waiting room once again. Tig was waiting at the elevator for me, "Are the boys okay," I asked as Tig hugged me.

"Thomas is fine, just a little shook up," Tig swallowed and bit his lip, "Abel is in surgery. His heart went irregular and they are trying to reverse it. He busted up his head, too. Didn't need stitches but he's got a good bandage going on."

We walked into the waiting room, Tara stood up and nearly ran to me, "My boys," she cried and we held each other for a moment.

"Abel is strong," I whispered, I held her and reached out to Jax who took my hand, "He's so strong."

I curled up on the uncomfortable loveseat of a double chair, Tig put his arm around him and kissed the top of my head, "Everyone was okay at home?"

"Yeah," I said, "Ellie took over our bed with the dogs, Neeta came over and was ready to go."

"Good," Tig flipped through the pages of an old Highlights magazine. We were all quiet after that.

After a few hours, the Doctor came in and we all stood up and surrounded him. He was more than used to us rough and tumble bikers, he wasn't intimidated, "Abel will be fine, he'll need to take it easy and rest here for a couple of days of observation. They're getting him sewn up and you can see him in an hour or two."

Tara cried into Jax's shoulder and Tig hugged me, "Let's make a coffee run," he said, I nodded and kissed Jax and Tara. Tig and I walked hand in hand down to the twenty-four café.

"We should take a vacation," I said, waiting for the barista to make ten different coffees. I was impressed that I could recite everyone's favorite drink.

"To where," Tig asked.

"I don't know," I shrugged, "The kids have been through so much, they just need to get away. Take a weekend and spend it on the beach."

"They need to go to Disney," Tig said without a pause, "I've been thinking about it, too. They haven't had too much of a childhood."

Tig and I carried the coffees back up the elevator, "We'll talk about it once Abel is better, then we can plan it."

Tig nodded and we passed out the coffee and took our place on the loveseat once again. The volume on the television had been turned up and Tara went to speak with Abel's surgeons. We all chatted quietly. I turned to Tig, "Why did Gemma crash?"

Tig looked to Jax, "It's over now, Gracie," Jax rubbed his eyes.

"Jackson," I said, sitting up slowly, every fiber of my being on point, "Jackson, why did Gemma crash?"

Jackson shot me a look that would have made any Croeater shut up, "Oh no," I said, "You tell me right now."

Everyone was silent and Jax stood up, I followed him outside the waiting room, down the hall. Tig quietly followed behind, giving us space but close enough to hear us and restrain me, "Gemma was high. And drunk."

"Son of a bitch," I took off for Gemma's room, "Where is she? Where the fuck is she?"

I saw her through a window in one of the doors, "Gracie, stop," Tig said but, I was already in the room.

"How _dare _you," Tig wrapped his arm around my torso and hauled me backwards but, I was strong and pulled him towards Gemma, "I am going to kill you, I swear to God," Gemma cried and hid her face in her hands, "Don't hide, you bitch," I screamed.

Tig and Jax pulled me outside, Tig had his arms around me, pinning my own arms down, "Calm down, baby," he whispered in my ear, his beard rubbing against my skin, "Calm down," I stopped wiggling and pressed my head against Tig's cheek.

"I can't do this, Tig," I said, my voice shook but I wasn't crying, "Tig, I need to get out of here for awhile."

"Once Abel can go with us, we'll go," Tig whispered, "Just a little while longer."

Once Tara and Jax had settled down in Abel's room with Thomas, we all went home. The sun was rising, Neeta had gone to bed. Tig and I couldn't disturb Ellie and the dogs so we just took over the couch. Tig was out cold in a few minutes, I was too sleep. After an hour Tig groaned next to me, "If you don't go to sleep, I'm going to chokehold you until you do."

"How could I have ever doubted you were Prince Charming," I yawned and fell asleep, narrowly avoiding a chokehold from my one true love.


	43. Chapter 43

I had just fallen asleep, I felt a rhythmic buzz against my back, "That better be your phone," I grumbled pushing my face into the couch cushion. Now that I had had a good few minutes of sleep, I was exhausted. All nighters were not as easy anymore.

Tig answered his phone, "Yeah," he said. I was using his arm as a pillow and I laced my fingers in his, he tightened his grip, too, "Well shit, do you need us? We just got home from Saint Thomas."

I turned over so that I was facing Tig, he hung up the phone, "Lyla got shot, Chibs got pistol whipped," Tig held my face before I could freak out, "Everyone is fine, chill out."

Tig held me until I calmed down, "I'm not going to get to sleep, Tig," I said, "You want breakfast?"

"Go. To. Sleep. Gracie."

I was tired but, I was also full of adrenaline and freaking out. Tig wrapped his arms and legs around me, caging me in until I did fall asleep.

…

Tig was gone when I woke up, I was curled up in a ball, drooling. I stood up and stretched, "Anybody home?"

"We're out back," Tig said, "Night swimming."

Tig, Jax and Chibs were sitting on the porch while the kids swam and Thomas and Ava played on a blanket in the grass, the dogs looking on. Abel was still recovering at the hospital, "We'll pick him up in the morning," Jax said, reading my mind.

I procured beers for all of us, I kissed Chibs' on the head, avoiding his staples, "You should really avoid the head trauma," I poked fun at him. Tig pulled me down onto his lap and held me close.

"Yeah, I suppose," Chibs said quietly. We were all quiet for awhile, watching the kids play and have fun, not caring about anything or anyone.

Jax cleared his throat, "Otto killed a nurse at Stockton today."

"What," Tig said, I lifted my head from Tig's shoulder, Chibs slowly looked over to Jax.

"Tara brought him one of Luann's crucifix necklaces and he stabbed a woman to death with it," Jax went on, I looked to the kids to make sure they weren't listening, thankfully they were too busy playing Marco Polo.

"She's an accessory," Tig said, "Shit, man."

"She's pretty shaken up," Jax rubbed his eyes, "I'm exhausted."

I stood up, "Time for bed kids," I looked at my phone, "It's almost midnight, none of you should be up. I turned around to Chibs and Jax, "Both of you, get to bed."

"What," Jax looked up at me, confused.

"You take the spare bedroom and Chibs can take our bed," I ushered everyone in the house, "Everyone is sleeping, no one is leaving until after breakfast is served, clear?"

"We have a shit ton to get done, Gracie," Chibs noted but he was already heading to the bed.

"All of you are wiped out, I don't care what you have to get done, it can wait," I crossed my arms and Tig flopped down on the couch again, everyone else quietly went to their appointed rooms; Jax took Thomas for some bonding time.

"You're getting kind of bossy," Tig said as I crawled on top of him and rested my head on his chest.

"I prefer maternal," I said, already falling asleep. I should have done laundry or something since I slept all day but, I didn't care at this point in my week.

I lay awake listening to everyone sleeping, Chibs was snoring like a chainsaw and I could hear the boys giggling downstairs about it. Jax and Thomas were playing, I could hear Thomas' laughing and Jax cooing and talking to him. Tig slipped his hand under my shirt, just resting it on the small of my back, skin on skin.

…

The "everyone stays until breakfast" plan didn't work out. Tig kissed my nose and I woke up, "I gotta go, Jax took Thomas home to Tara," Tig said, "Stay here for awhile, call me if you plan on leaving?"

"Everything okay," I asked, stretching out.

"Yeah, just going to get some shit done," Tig kissed my again and left. The kids were asleep, Tig's bike the only thing disrupting the glorious silence.

A few hours later, we were all bored. The kids helped me clean, we did every load of laundry we could and the pool was spotless. Although, I did most of the pool cleaning, "Let's go to the clubhouse," Piper said.

"Yeah," Kenny agreed, "Swing set and the Xbox is there!"

"Alright," I said, "Get ready, I'll go get Ava and her bag."

We were all so bored, we made it to the clubhouse in no time. Ava was happy to see Thomas in their playpen and the kids were self sufficient. The church doors were shut, I found Chucky in the garage, Gemma and Unser stood in the doorway of the office. Gemma avoided eye contact with me, Unser nodded and they went back inside. Jax and Tara may have forgiven Gemma but, I couldn't forgive her anymore. I always said that but, everyone seemed to find their places back in my life again. I wasn't sure she could do it this time.

"What's new, Uncle Chuck," I said, watching the kids swing on their playground.

"Guys are in church," he said, "Clay came out awhile ago, just went back in."

Clay walked back out, we all heard the shouting and went to the front of the building. Jax was on top of Clay, hitting him over and over. Finally, Chibs pulled him off. Tig held his hand up and I stayed back until he came to me. I walked over to the kids, who had stopped playing and stood staring, "Don't worry about it, guys," I smiled at them, "Just ignore it."

"Can we go on the roof," Ellie asked.

"Sure," I said, "Let's getcha some snacks," I corralled the three of them, found some glass root beer bottles and a bag of chips. They ran off and climbed up the ladder. Two boys and girl looked scarily familiar on the top of the clubhouse.

"Hey," Tig said, standing next to me. He put his arm around me.

"What happened," I asked, putting my arms around his waist.

"Clay is out," Tig said, he stared up at the kids, "Out, forever."

I thought Tig was going to cry. He exhaled shakily and I held him tighter, pressing my lips to his chest, "It's okay, Tig."

"Yeah," Tig kissed my forehead, "I gotta go. You guys go home. Not sure if I'll make it back tonight."

I caught Tig's hand, "Hang on," I pulled him back, "Don't disappear on me, okay," I stood up on my toes and waited for Tig's lips to touch mine, he moved closer but stopped short, waiting for me. I kissed him, "I love you."

"I love you," Tig mumbled and walked away.

…

Back home, everyone was pretty quiet after seeing Jax beat Clay up, especially Ellie. I walked down to her room, "Hey," I leaned on the doorframe, "You okay?"

She shrugged and went back to her coloring. Her wall was slowly filling up with pictures of dogs and princesses and motorcycles. She was working on a very detailed picture of Tig although; his hair was more of an afro than curls, "Is Clay going to die?"

"I don't know," I said, "Clay isn't a member of the Club anymore. He is on his own now; I don't know what will happen."

"Okay," she said, she never looked up.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"No, thanks," she replied.

The doorbell rang and I gave one more look to Ellie, she was drawing intently and obviously didn't want me around at the moment. I walked back upstairs, Tara was at the door with the boys, "Hi," I greeted her and let her in.

"I need you to take the boys for awhile," she panicked, "It's Wendy, she wants custody of Abel. She wants to see him."

My shoulders sagged, "I just want a vacation."

"You and me, both," Tara said, "I have to go, Abel's meds are in his bag, instructions are on them. Make sure he doesn't scratch his incision. Thomas already ate and was changed," Tara kissed me on the cheek and practically ran out the door.

"Well, alrighty then," I smiled at Thomas who, blissfully, smiled back.

…


End file.
